• Reminder: Do not call, text, or mention harrassing someone in real life. Do not encourage it. Do not talk about killing or using violence against anyone, or engaging in any criminal behavior. If it is not an obvious joke even when taken out of context, don't post it. Please report violators.

    DMCA, complaints, and other inquiries:

    [email protected]

They picked me randomly

fricklefrackle

Forum Clout
46,945
This is his punishment.
His entire day, rather than being spent in pursuit of some higher endeavor, to simply provide for his family or even himself, or to raise and shape the lives of future generations, is spent meticulously staging photographs of completely pedestrian meals, rolling the dice yet again in the hope that this time he will hit, that this will be the plate of chicken that cements his place among the greatest minds of our time. He hits "Tweet" imagining the job offers for punditry that will arise from his viral Chicken Plate.
But as the minutes and then hours go by, he comes to the realization yet again that this one was not to be. Maybe it got eclipsed by some other news story; maybe it was buried by the algorithms. Maybe the world just wasn't ready for chicken and citrus fruit adorned with lightsaber chopsticks. No matter.
There is always the next meal, and the next tweet.
Each time hoping that this tweet will be the one to make him famous. This will be the one which will allow him to prove them wrong. Everyone who said you need to get a job, you're an addict, it's a dying platform, this is not good for your mental health - he's going to show them all. All it takes is that next perfect tweet.

This is his life, and it's every bit of punishment he deserves.
Well said.
 
G

guest

Guest
This is his punishment.
His entire day, rather than being spent in pursuit of some higher endeavor, to simply provide for his family or even himself, or to raise and shape the lives of future generations, is spent meticulously staging photographs of completely pedestrian meals, rolling the dice yet again in the hope that this time he will hit, that this will be the plate of chicken that cements his place among the greatest minds of our time. He hits "Tweet" imagining the job offers for punditry that will arise from his viral Chicken Plate.
But as the minutes and then hours go by, he comes to the realization yet again that this one was not to be. Maybe it got eclipsed by some other news story; maybe it was buried by the algorithms. Maybe the world just wasn't ready for chicken and citrus fruit adorned with lightsaber chopsticks. No matter.
There is always the next meal, and the next tweet.
Each time hoping that this tweet will be the one to make him famous. This will be the one which will allow him to prove them wrong. Everyone who said you need to get a job, you're an addict, it's a dying platform, this is not good for your mental health - he's going to show them all. All it takes is that next perfect tweet.

This is his life, and it's every bit of punishment he deserves.
This was poetic.
 
G

guest

Guest
Patrick,
I know you have an account on here, or at least one of your friends do where you read these replies. I am being 100% legitimate with you dude, I think everyone on this message board will agree that they will completely stop messing with you if you fight me.
I live in Northeast Iowa. It's a day trip for me to come to you. We can put the gloves on, go to an actual boxing gym and have it out until one of us wins.
I will give you as much time as you want to train, and I will give you five hundred dollars if you are man enough to take even ONE punch from me. Even if the one punch knocks you out I'll still pay you.
But I don't think you'll do it dude. Because you may have just as much talent as Uwe Boll, but I don't think you have the sack to get into a boxing ring with your detractors like Uwe Boll did.

I'm calling you out man to man and this is not a joke. I will box you for real (or cage fight or street fight however you want to do it) and I will pay you $500 under the condition that the fight gets to be filmed and uploaded to the internet.

The easiest half grand you'll ever make AND you'll get to put one of these pussy internet trolls in their place.

I eagerly await your response.

Edit: I said I would give you all the time you wanted to train, but you will have to wait at least 4 weeks for this to go down because I'm having my nose surgically reset from the fight I got into on Thursday. Because unlike you, I'm man enough to talk the way I do on the internet in real life unlike most people. I'm not going to post my full face on the internet (that's always a huge no no) but here is proof I can take a punch. You know, so you know you're not wasting your time with a weakling and you'll be able to properly beat the troll out of me.

Here's what backing up the shit I talk did to my eye on Friday:
56d294a5-b171-47fb-9086-5d6ebc9eff26 (1).jpeg
 
Last edited by a moderator:

'THE NIGGER MAN'

Shane Noakes' rabbi raped his 9 year old dick off.
Forum Clout
47,450
Patrick,
I know you have an account on here, or at least one of your friends do where you read these replies. I am being 100% legitimate with you dude, I think everyone on this message board will agree that they will completely stop messing with you if you fight me.
I live in Northeast Iowa. It's a day trip for me to come to you. We can put the gloves on, go to an actual boxing gym and have it out until one of us wins.
I will give you as much time as you want to train, and I will give you five hundred dollars if you are man enough to take even ONE punch from me. Even if the one punch knocks you out I'll still pay you.
But I don't think you'll do it dude. Because you may have just as much talent as Uwe Boll, but I don't think you have the sack to get into a boxing ring with your detractors like Uwe Boll did.

I'm calling you out man to man and this is not a joke. I will box you for real (or cage fight or street fight however you want to do it) and I will pay you $500 under the condition that the fight gets to be filmed and uploaded to the internet.

The easiest half grand you'll ever make AND you'll get to put one of these pussy internet trolls in their place.

I eagerly await your response.

Edit: I said I would give you all the time you wanted to train, but you will have to wait at least 4 weeks for this to go down because I'm having my nose surgically reset from the fight I got into on Thursday. Because unlike you, I'm man enough to talk the way I do on the internet in real life unlike most people. I'm not going to post my full face on the internet (that's always a huge no no) but here is proof I can take a punch. You know, so you know you're not wasting your time with a weakling and you'll be able to properly beat the troll out of me.

Here's what backing up the shit I talk did to my eye on Friday:
View attachment 22295

Hey piggy or whatever kidfucker minion monitoring the farms:

Take your chances with Worm Killer or accept NigSam's offer:

Defeat me for $23k. You're a trained faggot or something, right?

But after this redneck troll stomps Patso's fucking guts out, Patrick S Tomlinson's social media goes away forever.

Who's the baddest? Some fat queer internet loudmouth or a random troll from parts unknown?

Oink oink
 
G

guest

Guest

Hey piggy or whatever kidfucker minion monitoring the farms:

Take your chances with Worm Killer or accept NigSam's offer:

Defeat me for $23k. You're a trained faggot or something, right?

But after this redneck troll stomps Patso's fucking guts out, Patrick S Tomlinson's social media goes away forever.

Who's the baddest? Some fat queer internet loudmouth or a random troll from parts unknown?

Oink oink
Maybe we can both show up and he can take his pick. Or he can bring a friend and you can fight him and I'll fight his friend. I'll get down regardless just so we have a video of this.

And Pat no I'm not a trained professional I've never been in any kind of fighting contests, I'm almost as old as you I'll be 38 next month, I'm sloppy and overweight from covid and the only experience in fighting I've ever had is in bars and while I was in prison.

Why don't you repost this message on your Twitter Fatrick and see how hardcore your "fans" are? You asked them if you think it's worth fighting one of us.

I just know me personally dude? I wouldn't ever let a group of people bitch me out for this long. I wouldn't try to take them to court either because I'm not a punk ass cop caller who sues people either. Only Sue I care about is lightning baby.

Be a man for once in your pathetic fucking life. Dude even if I knock you out, do you have any idea how much respect you will have earned from your friends and your fans for having the guts to stand up to somebody who is been ruining your life for years?
 

'THE NIGGER MAN'

Shane Noakes' rabbi raped his 9 year old dick off.
Forum Clout
47,450
Maybe we can both show up and he can take his pick. Or he can bring a friend and you can fight him and I'll fight his friend. I'll get down regardless just so we have a video of this.

And Pat no I'm not a trained professional I've never been in any kind of fighting contests, I'm almost as old as you I'll be 38 next month, I'm sloppy and overweight from covid and the only experience in fighting I've ever had is in bars and while I was in prison.

Why don't you repost this message on your Twitter Fatrick and see how hardcore your "fans" are? You asked them if you think it's worth fighting one of us.

I just know me personally dude? I wouldn't ever let a group of people bitch me out for this long. I wouldn't try to take them to court either because I'm not a punk ass cop caller who sues people either. Only Sue I care about is lightning baby.

Be a man for once in your pathetic fucking life. Dude even if I knock you out, do you have any idea how much respect you will have earned from your friends and your fans for having the guts to stand up to somebody who is been ruining your life for years?
I'd teabag Rakdaddy or drop-kick Paul out of his wheelchair and sodomize him with a telephoto lens. No extra charge.

We need Boomia and one more country-strong brothaman and we can Four Pigmen? this gimmick. BaconSlam 2022.
 

Brooke Shields

Patrick Tomlinson hates me because I am a woman
Forum Clout
67,875
Patrick,
I know you have an account on here, or at least one of your friends do where you read these replies. I am being 100% legitimate with you dude, I think everyone on this message board will agree that they will completely stop messing with you if you fight me.
I live in Northeast Iowa. It's a day trip for me to come to you. We can put the gloves on, go to an actual boxing gym and have it out until one of us wins.
I will give you as much time as you want to train, and I will give you five hundred dollars if you are man enough to take even ONE punch from me. Even if the one punch knocks you out I'll still pay you.
But I don't think you'll do it dude. Because you may have just as much talent as Uwe Boll, but I don't think you have the sack to get into a boxing ring with your detractors like Uwe Boll did.

I'm calling you out man to man and this is not a joke. I will box you for real (or cage fight or street fight however you want to do it) and I will pay you $500 under the condition that the fight gets to be filmed and uploaded to the internet.

The easiest half grand you'll ever make AND you'll get to put one of these pussy internet trolls in their place.

I eagerly await your response.

Edit: I said I would give you all the time you wanted to train, but you will have to wait at least 4 weeks for this to go down because I'm having my nose surgically reset from the fight I got into on Thursday. Because unlike you, I'm man enough to talk the way I do on the internet in real life unlike most people. I'm not going to post my full face on the internet (that's always a huge no no) but here is proof I can take a punch. You know, so you know you're not wasting your time with a weakling and you'll be able to properly beat the troll out of me.

Here's what backing up the shit I talk did to my eye on Friday:
View attachment 22295
I just told Patrick this and he finally texted me back.
He says that since you originally said he gets to choose how long he trains, he wants to train until whatever day you have your surgery and fight during the appointment.
Your move wormkiller, he said.

Bro you got this, take fatty down
 
G

guest

Guest
I'd teabag Rakdaddy or drop-kick Paul out of his wheelchair and sodomize him with a telephoto lens. No extra charge.
I will throw hands with him for real. Referee and everything. He can bring as many people as he wants and I'll only bring one person so they can film it. I'll even hand over the money to a neutral party before the fight starts.

Anything for the satisfaction of feeling that right cross just connect to that big fat face and watching him fold faster than Superman on laundry day.
 
G

guest

Guest
I just told Patrick this and he finally texted me back.
He says that since you originally said he gets to choose how long he trains, he wants to train until whatever day you have your surgery and fight during the appointment.
Your move wormkiller, he said.

Bro you got this, take fatty down
I think even while under the anesthesia, my muscle memory still gives me a 50/50 shot of winning.
 
Top