What's the worst job you ever had?

[Dummy Gaynuts]

I worked one day for an insane rage-filled jewish manlet at a sticker company in Astoria. He broke a coffee cup because his wife pissed him off so bad

 

[Carl Winslow]

I was in the Air Force for 12 years, and legit wanted to kill myself a large chunk of that time.

Reason why I didn't get out sooner was because I got locations, but it was always the people that ruined it.

The 12 years I was in, I enjoyed 6 months in UAE, 6 months in Qatar (my 2nd time there), and my year in Korea... so 2 years out of 12 I really enjoyed lol. basic and tech school was cool too.

 

[FrogmanKurlan]

I worked at a car wash in high school. It really sucked at first and i really wanted to quit the first few weeks but I didn’t want to bitch out. I worked hard and got promoted to crew lead and that was a good learning experience. I only left there when I started college.
I worked at Academy, that’s a big sports retailer for you non Americans. It was alright, I worked in the hunting and fishing section and eventually got to where I could work behind the gun bar. I did quit because I wasn’t making enough money. They only paid minimum wage and gave you no more than 30 hours a week. Talking to customers about guns and stuff was fun but the managers would always give us pointless busy work. Retail work is pretty retarded.

 

[TheNanaDook]

I've been lucky - done a bunch of things and every job had a big upside. Either good money, getting off early, or doing something creative (never more than one of those together, of course).

I've also had several jobs that involved doing fuck all, which is nice for a while but gets depressing eventually.

Are you in your 30s? I used to get bored when i got too far ahead in my job to where there wasn’t much to do, but now in my late 30s, I’m enjoying it. I’ve automated most of my wfh software gig and i know there will be crunch times, but 90% of the time i can keep my laundry done, grass cut, and whatever else i need done, all while on the clock.

 

[MunchausenByProxy]

Number 2 - warehouse gig at 16 - summer job. Funny older guys working there, but it served as a motivator.

As a teen I had a summer warehouse job too, putting produce orders on pallets. I was such an airhead as a kid that it didnt even occur to me how depressing it was that some dudes did this for their whole lives. All I knew was I was saving money for a shorehouse and senior summer was going to fucking rule. The harsh reality of life wasnt even sniffing me yet, I wish I could still live in the moment like that in such a pure way.

Anyway, the only 2 kids there were me and this guy I went to school with and we had the same sense of humor so we’d crack each other the fuck up all day so it wasnt that bad. If I had half a brain though I wouldve seen it for the wage slavery that it was. Any adult there was an ex-con with no future

 

[1950'sSpaceProgram]

Only cashiers had to do the Wagie Waggle, stock cucks were safe.

 

[guest]

As a teen I had a summer warehouse job too, putting produce orders on pallets. I was such an airhead as a kid that it didnt even occur to me how depressing it was that some dudes did this for their whole lives.

There was an older Irish guy called Tom at the place I worked at. He gave me a shorter and blunter version of that speech Affleck gives Damon in Good Will Hunting which basically boiled down to "work hard in school, you don't want to be doing a job like this when you're my age."

 

[Stent]

You're a striver, funster. And now you're living high on the hog and not being frivolous with ribs.

Ribs are for funsters only!

I was a paper boy. Me and you seem to have a lot in common

I'm not falling for that trick again. Molest me once, shame on you etc.

my first job was retail in a clothes store, but that still beats prepping railings outside along with some literal retard who brags the way antH does
my dad made the trade sound like a fucking buzz and it probably was through the 90s but now it's filled with literal retards and jaded old cunts
quasi made me realise IT's the route to go, few quid and he's teaching me java and kotlin, thank you brother
(btw, love the doner kebab pot noodle)

Good to see you didn't die.

 

[guest]

I never molested you

 

[Cuphead]

I worked in sales/customer support for a branding company when I was out of college. Hated so much I really did contemplate not showing up again several times with no back up job. The job was boring as fuck and most of the time was just spent cold calling via email and virtual calls with clients that seemed like they went nowhere. The pay was shit to the point I was still bartending part time to make extra cash and the benefits were subpar compared to every other company I've worked for even though they tried to convince you were getting amazing ones. The people who enjoyed working there were all fucking weirdos and I'm pretty sure my team lead was a pedophile and everyone else I knew there fucking hated it and was miserable. At the end of the year, I complained to my team lead during reviews about a bunch of stuff and 4 days later I got fired because apparently I wasn't aligning with the company values or some bullshit anymore. Apparently I had offended him or something and he went to his boss and convinced them to fire me. Fawkin scummbag. All worked out in the end though because a company I interviewed for a few days before hired me the next day.

Runner up was I waited tables at a chain restaurant during High School that was the most unorganized shit hole of a restaurant I've ever worked in. The owner was probably the biggest kike I've ever met.

 

[Stetten's Long Thumbers]

This may be the most pathetic thing I've ever seen.

My phone auto corrects pathetic to Patrick. It's quite brilliant

 

[BonnieMcFarlaneMe2]

I’ve been having a blast roofing for the past 3 months. Idk if the navy just sucked so bad that everything else is great in comparison, but me and my foreman, who’s the same age as me, just drive around doing jobs and fucking around. Maybe I’ll change my mind when it starts getting hot though

I always assume roofing to entail being on a crew of 5 to 10 and staying on one site all day until it’s finished or you can finish in the morning. At least, those were the jobs I was “recruited” for.

 

[BonnieMcFarlaneMe2]

This may be the most pathetic thing I've ever seen.

My phone auto corrects pathetic to Patrick. It's quite brilliant

It’s hilarious that like 4 people are obviously filming this moron at once. I’d just walk out.

 

[DMAN]

My teen years were spent working awful retail jobs in NYC listening to O&A on a headset with mic. It looked like something you could only get at a workplace, at the time, so I got away with it.

Dealing with the public has made me look at humans like cattle. When you encounter so many who are so similar in their arrogance and demands of you. I would never let people pull the karen cards with me back then. I would just hang up on people, or laugh at what the said, and walk away. You don't get paid to fight with people.

It was like 2002 and those motorized scooter carts for old people and fat pieces of shit were really being adopted everwhere. Whenever I would see someone waddle in, and sit on one of them, it took everything in me not to become visibly irritated. Those people are an absolute lost fucking cause. If you can't even walk around a store to shop, and you're going to sit tight in other crusty fat fuck's swamp ass.... Lazy consumer pieces of shit. And they're always lingering and trying to sniff out a jew discount. Beggars. Wearing giant "VETERAN" hats just so you know they are special and you are not. BEEP BEEP

My first workshop job i was on an old milling machine putting blades on large 2' circular steel disks. They were too big to fit on the shops lathe. There was a handcrank you had to turn to rotate the disk and I had to make around 3 revolutions to finish one half of one disk. The cutter would spit white hot metal directly into the path of the handcrank so you could only perform the cut while getting burned to shit. When the cutter started getting blunt the crank became almost impossible for scrawny 17 old me to turn so it became 4 or more revs of moltern red metal getting spat in my face. On the 2nd day I came in with my head shaved as so much of my hair was burned away and this way the turnings would more likely bounce off than singe and melt into your head. I had one flake of molten metal go into my mouth once and hit the back of my throat, I immediately vomited in response all over the machine.

After that and one more shit job order I started working on CNC machines programming the jobs and the found some old Polak to do the shit jobs nobody wanted. The job was 6.5 days a week, we finished 30 mins early on Friday (Half day Friday) 6am-1700 with one unpaid break and 2 20 minute tea breaks.

Edit: I still preferred this job to being a waiter dealing with peoples petty bullshit.

Hey dawgsie, ever heard of a welders mask? You're welcome.

 

[guest]

Killed geese for a few days once. Well, I caught them but at fourteen I wasn't hard enough to cut their heads off. It was for Christmas so we ran out of work pretty quick. Cold-calling sucks, I've done a lot of grueling work but the worst has to be laborer for a general contractor. Either you're doing fucking nothing all day or you're cleaning up after the Indian drywall crews who pretend they don't speak English. Or dragging propane tanks around for heaters. Or moving something today so you can move it again tomorrow and so forth.

I'd rather break rocks.

 

[Smeckler's Powder]

This was long before the pit bull menace. I don't think I ever saw one or there were so few, I can't remember. If I remember correctly the ladies said some farmer adopted the horse, but it was so long ago it may have gone to the glue factory and I'm just tricking myself into a happy ending.
You try not to get attached to the dogs but sometimes you can't help it. One that got me was this Siberian husky never got adopted (which was rare pure breeds or ones that looked mostly pure got adopted) I used to walk this dog and got real attached. One morning I had to go in the freezer and there was the husky in a rubber trash can and someone put a cigarette in its mouth. Seeing it like that really got me

fucking hell brotherman

 

[Smeckler's Powder]

I got him back for that years later

How so?

 

[Smeckler's Powder]

First job was janitor at my high school. Didn't want to do it, but looking back, great gig.

Next job was at the pepper/onion processing plant that sent them across the river to Ore-Ida to turn into the shit you buy at stores. I was in peppers and there were two positions they switched you back and forth from. One was standing on either side of the conveyer belt as peppers got dumped on it and you would grab them and smash out the core on this steel rod and throw them down a shoot. They got chopped up and spat out onto another conveyer belt where depending on which side you were standing on, picked out the bad bits and threw them to the trash half or the good ones and vice versa. So much gross shit never got pulled out of the supposed good side of the belt. Knowing what I do now about how shit our food supply is, they must have been dying them green/red either there or at Ore-Ida so they probably didn't need to give a shit that "quality control" was seriously lacking. I'm talking like full on rotten peppers making it all the way through, and shitloads of them. Holy fuck did time move slow at this job. Conveniently, the bitches slicing onions were positioned below the pepper line, so it was great having that shit burning your nose/eyes all day. Occasionally there was an ammonia leak. I'd try to sing songs in my head the whole time to try to make the time go faster, and I'd get through the entirety of "Stairway to Heaven" only to look at the clock and have it be 5 minutes earlier than when I started the song. Fucking hell that shit sucked.

Next job was getting hired at this farm to do various things. I don't know if I made it a whole week before the guy was like "yeah maybe this isn't for you." It probably would have been an okay gig in a lot of ways but siphon tubes are heavy as shit and if you've ever tried to set them you know that you can get all the way across the field before realizing you did them all crooked and if you tried to turn them on they would separate and shit. I had already applied at the Wal Mart and they called to hire me so we amicably parted ways.

Wal-Mart hired me to push carts, because evidently, the assumed I was retarded or something because when I was filling out the application at the machine in the store, thinking I'd be able to go back and edit it it before submitting it, I put in a bunch of gibberish for references and stuff. So they called my house and my mom answered and gave them all the info lol. So I got hired to work with a cart pushing crew that was 90% mild to heavy retarded dudes 9% felon goofballs who were 19 with 19 kids and myself. It was actually not that bad a gig. Lots of freedom and goof off time that I don't know if I appreciated properly at the time. When I decided to move to Las Vegas they transferred me to a location here where I started spending the mornings hanging in the car listening to Carolla which turned into getting exposed to Owen A. The other dudes working the Vegas location were different than the ones back home, not entirely retards, dudes slinging weed/ecstacy/blow in the parking lot type of shit. Had some funny run ins with Jimmy "Dynomite" JJ Walker who used to come in there to try and bang one of the CSMs.

Worked at a survey call center for a short amount of time. Awful. Fucking really bad.

Working at Red Robin started out shitty since they hired me as a host and kept dangling "we'll make you a server" in front of me forever. One bad scenario after the next and I'm living in my car, sleeping in the parking lot. When I finally got them to make me a server all a sudden I was making great money and the bartender was getting me wasted. Worked out great for awhile, then they closed our store and sent us to other locations which were shitty and made me less money. I didn't care much that it sucked shit because I had a lot of other shit going on outside of that job playing music and such and my rent was not that expensive. Eventually when music world/getting loads of poontang/doing loads of great drugs went into a lull I started hating that job more and with jobs like that there's usually a lot of turnover in management and when you get a niggercunt that hates you, it becomes an awful environment. I started stealing as much shit as I could from the place and causing just general chaos around the place. They didn't have anything specific to fire me for so like someone else had said earlier I was fired for my "values no longer aligning with those of Red Robin" and shit. I later went back in to bring another ex employee some shrooms and caused quite a disturbance while wasted and on mushrooms/some mystery pill. Walked in the side door and right up to a family eating dinner and grabbed the dads glass announcing to the whole restaurant "anybody wanna see something funny?!?" and smashing the glass on the ground. Licked a girls face, yadda yadda.

So glad I didn't get involved in any pyramid schemes. I had two different people try to recruit me really hard while I was at that first Red Robin. The first was this chick who had eaten there and she starts talking to me on her way out and gets my number and shit. I think I'm gonna fuck this chick. Nope, she's working at some bullshit place trying to get me to join. lol. Next dude I thought just wanted to hang out and he had a hot bitch with him so I figured I'd go hang out with the dude. We went to the Plaza hotel and ate dinner(which was good) while they tried to convince me to join whatever their bullshit was. Dude was giving me the hardest fucking sell ever. I was like no way and didn't hear from the guy again. About a year later I'm in a Wal Mart in another part of town entirely and I hear a familiar voice loudly yelling "we're clapping in unison!" or some such nonsense and I turn and look and it's that same dude that tried to recruit me for the pyramid thing, wearing a Wal Mart uniform and trying to hi-five his co-worker. Felt like some full circle type shit.

 

[Maybe even kiss you]

This may be the most pathetic thing I've ever seen.

My phone auto corrects pathetic to Patrick. It's quite brilliant

The fucking jerkoff leading the chant is probably the only one there with a salary you can somewhat live on.

 

[stillreal2medammit]

I've had a bunch of dirty, physically demanding jobs and I like to go hard. It makes the day go quicker. I can think of two that I particularly hated. I had a temp job when I was a teenager delivering carpets to high rise condo buildings that were in construction. I'm strong as fuck and that was the most back breaking shit I've ever done. You had to carry entire giant rooms worth of carpet on your shoulder all day long. I got rug burn all down the side of my face and fucked up my ear from throwing the heavy ass rolls onto my shoulder. Every day I did it I felt like I wasn't going to make it to the end of the day.

The other one was a huge chicken farm. I liked the work and was basically by myself all day just doing chores but there were some jobs that I had to do with other people and every single person who worked there was fucking miserable and they all hated eachother. The family that owned the farms were some of the biggest cunts I've ever met too. Also, showing up to a giant chicken farm hungover is a nightmare.

Honest question did you get cauliflower ear?