What's the cringiest thing that ever happened to you in school?

[TorpidSloth]

You learn about earfquakes and tsunamis and wildfires and tectonic plates and shit.

My younger son would lose his mind for that. He's obsessed with tornados etc. Must've seen Twister 10 times.

 

[TheGhostOfAbeVigoda]

One time we were all sitting in gym and one of the girls started screaming. Turns out the tard was shitting her pants and it was basically just liquid. I don't know why she was even in our class - she wasn't able to understand or participate in anything.

When I was in like grade 3 we had this fat girl in our class for a while who in hindsight had to be at least a little retarded. She had these crazy long coughing fits where she'd turn red as fuck with her eyes all watering and bulging out and she'd get all sweaty. One day we had a substitute and she'd been doing it all day but she started dying coughing in gym while this guy was trying to explain some bullshit game he was going to have us play and he finally snapped and was like "ELIZABETH GO GET A GODDAMNED DRINK FROM THE FOUNTAIN OR SOMETHING!" Like he yelled at her in a way that would've made any other girl cry but she just like gave a thumbs up while she kept hacking and fucked off.

I took karate for a while (gay fucking shit) at the school and I got paired up with her one time and she kicked me in the nuts twice. The second time was on purpose because she thought it was funny.

 

[TheGhostOfAbeVigoda]

I took that shit too out of sheer laziness.

Absolutely.

 

[TheGhostOfAbeVigoda]

View attachment 246821

NO! THAT'S A DIFFERENT GROUNDHOG IN THAT ONE!

 

[BonnieMcFarlaneMe2]

NO! THAT'S A DIFFERENT GROUNDHOG IN THAT ONE!

I like that Bill and Chevy hated each other when they made that movie. Interestingly enough, they got in a fight at SNL because John Belushi was instigating it by saying a bunch of shit that Chevy was allegedly talking. This is what he said on Stern so he could just be trying to absolve himself.

 

[Sgt Zogbot Delta Operator]

I think I read Bill Hicks’ It’s Just A Ride for my speech class. Top that faggots

I shared Ben Folds Five's "Brick" in music appreciation class. Beat you.

 

[ミスタースパーコル]

My younger son would lose his mind for that. He's obsessed with tornados etc. Must've seen Twister 10 times.

I read that as "He's obsessed with tomatoes." (I'm sorry)

 

[TheGhostOfAbeVigoda]

I read that as "He's obsessed with tomatoes." (I'm sorry)

Nothing beats a nice homegrown summer beefsteak tomato.

 

[Patrick O'Neal]

This whole thread is a psychiatrist's wet dream to be honest with you.

I'm tempted to make up some bullshit to pretend I fit in here somehow.

 

[:sumaturry:]

My younger son would lose his mind for that. He's obsessed with tornados etc. Must've seen Twister 10 times.

FINGER OF GOD

 

[SoloJoeAcousticShow]

We had this obstacle course set up in the gym where the first obstacle was like a 6ft horizontal bar you had to climb, straddle over and then jump off. My teacher had me do the first run with everyone watching and I immediately fell off and landed on my back losing my breath, quickly ending the exercise.

I heard the giggles. They sometimes haunt me to be perfectly honest witcha. Fucked one of those chicks a year later so I guess I had the last laugh.

 

[aRTie02150]

I think I read Bill Hicks’ It’s Just A Ride for my speech class. Top that faggots

I would have been laughing uncontrollably at that. You know the teacher made fun with the other faculty.

 

[UnPRePared]

Any time my brother gets to being a snooty cunt like he's better than me, I remind him of this story:

In our neighbourhood growing up was a retarded kid - not a favorite term of mine, but I'm calling him retarded BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT HE WAS!

Anyway, 'Tard was infatuated by Coira, who was one of the prettiest girls our age (we weren't even ten yet ). I can't fault his taste, even Steve and I would argue over her, but she had a bit of an attitude - boys fawned over her and she used it to her advantage. So, you know, she learned Bitchy early.

And because she was a bitch, she was very rude to 'Tard. Needlessly, even, but he kept taking it because he thought he was in love. And he was, well you know. It amused all of us but I did feel bad about it.

However, one day he approached our friends and I in the park, asking how to get Coira to like him. I was prepared to tell the kid it was a lost cause, but Steve cut me off and took 'Tard aside, saying something along the lines of "You gotta show her just how much you love her!" 'Tard gets the biggest smile on his face and runs off. I'm disappointed in my brother for basically setting the dumbass up for heartbreak, but Steve shrugs, "what's the fucking worst that can happen?"

How about flashing his cock at the poor girl, because we found out later that's exactly what happened.

So yeah, I knock him down a peg or two with "remember when you convinced the local retard to show his dick to the neighbour girl, Steve?" whenever he's being a cunt.

 

[Dennyislife]

I did a really big long fart in assembly ( literally the whole school of 200+ kids) where we have essentially a school meeting every morning. Only the oldest kids got to sit on benches the rest of us had to sit crossed leg on the gym floor.

I pointed at the nerd nearby. I should have claimed it. It was a good 10 second ripper

 

[Niggerotchi]

I pulled this dudes pants down at the big bus line at the end of the day and the motherfucker was wearing a diaper. The cops were called, the cops came to my house and berated me for 20 minutes calling the diapered retard a hero.

 

[TorpidSloth]

Any time my brother gets to being a snooty cunt like he's better than me, I remind him of this story:

In our neighbourhood growing up was a retarded kid - not a favorite term of mine, but I'm calling him retarded BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT HE WAS!

Anyway, 'Tard was infatuated by Coira, who was one of the prettiest girls our age (we weren't even ten yet ). I can't fault his taste, even Steve and I would argue over her, but she had a bit of an attitude - boys fawned over her and she used it to her advantage. So, you know, she learned Bitchy early.

And because she was a bitch, she was very rude to 'Tard. Needlessly, even, but he kept taking it because he thought he was in love. And he was, well you know. It amused all of us but I did feel bad about it.

However, one day he approached our friends and I in the park, asking how to get Coira to like him. I was prepared to tell the kid it was a lost cause, but Steve cut me off and took 'Tard aside, saying something along the lines of "You gotta show her just how much you love her!" 'Tard gets the biggest smile on his face and runs off. I'm disappointed in my brother for basically setting the dumbass up for heartbreak, but Steve shrugs, "what's the fucking worst that can happen?"

How about flashing his cock at the poor girl, because we found out later that's exactly what happened.

So yeah, I knock him down a peg or two with "remember when you convinced the local retard to show his dick to the neighbour girl, Steve?" whenever he's being a cunt.

Mate, at this point, who are these even for?

 

[UnPRePared]

Mate, at this point, who are these even for?

Someone has to know my pain, lad.

 

[Niggerotchi]

I pulled this dudes pants down at the big bus line at the end of the day and the motherfucker was wearing a diaper. The cops were called, the cops came to my house and berated me for 20 minutes calling the diapered retard a hero.

Has anyone else ever been motherfucked by a diaper before?

 

[TheGhostOfAbeVigoda]

I did a really big long fart in assembly ( literally the whole school of 200+ kids) where we have essentially a school meeting every morning. Only the oldest kids got to sit on benches the rest of us had to sit crossed leg on the gym floor.

I pointed at the nerd nearby. I should have claimed it. It was a good 10 second ripper

The only two assemblies I ever went to in highschool, the same kid had a seizure both times. One time it was during a moment of silence (hilarious) and the other some girl was singing a Dixie Chicks song. You'd just hear chairs crashing around and then you'd see this kid flopping around on the ground. This kid was totally normal and no one knew he was epileptic or anything so everyone but the teachers were like "he's faking it" while his head is bouncing off the gym floor. The Dixie Chick got all pissy because he interrupted her and refused to finish the song lol.

 

[ミスタースパーコル]

The Dixie Chick got all pissy because he interrupted her and refused to finish the song lol.

I assume he was treated like a hero that he was after that and not teased mercilessly (or the incident was forgotten about).