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What's the biggest animal you think you could take in an unarmed fight?

TheGhostOfAbeVigoda

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A cow can easily fuck you up, they weigh not far off a ton and can trample you like nothing. Plus imagine how hard it would be to knock a cow out. :image_9247:
One kicked me in the head when I was putting the milking cluster on it's tits one time. I wouldn't recommend getting kicked by one. Fucking rocked my shit.

Or were you talking about a moose cow? I got kicked by a Holstein. Lol
 
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Jesse Ventura

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I would lose but I’d like to fawkin’ go a coyote 1v1.

My friend had a huge sheepdog as a kid and the thing was raised by a family if morons so it was completely retarded. My friend’s older brother would lock it in the laundry room and yell “steak!” and the dog would start slamming it’s head into the door trying to get out.

Anyway, that piece of shit bit me on the leg once and I gave it a Joe Frazier left hook right to the dome and it didn’t even flinch. I lit it up with all of my being and it just shook it off and kept acting like a retard.

That’s my dog fighting experience. I consider it an L.
 

Jim Norton’s Wife's Cock

Those breeches will stay open!
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I would lose but I’d like to fawkin’ go a coyote 1v1.

My friend had a huge sheepdog as a kid and the thing was raised by a family if morons so it was completely retarded. My friend’s older brother would lock it in the laundry room and yell “steak!” and the dog would start slamming it’s head into the door trying to get out.

Anyway, that piece of shit bit me on the leg once and I gave it a Joe Frazier left hook right to the dome and it didn’t even flinch. I lit it up with all of my being and it just shook it off and kept acting like a retard.

That’s my dog fighting experience. I consider it an L.
Growing up a lad on my street had a Golden Retriever that was a fucking faggot, it used to get really aggressive and go for you when you walked through the back gate in his garden. We used to get stoned with the lad, and one day we were in his back kitchen doing bongs whilst his parents were out.. and some dipshit emo kid who he was friends with walked in the back gate lol. The dog barked like fuck and scared the guy so he backed up against a wall, then it latched onto his leg and started swinging it's head around. The lad who's house it was ran out like a bolt and punched his dog in the head and it was dazed for like 30 seconds, couldn't walk straight and had to lay down for a bit.
 

TheGhostOfAbeVigoda

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I would lose but I’d like to fawkin’ go a coyote 1v1.

My friend had a huge sheepdog as a kid and the thing was raised by a family if morons so it was completely retarded. My friend’s older brother would lock it in the laundry room and yell “steak!” and the dog would start slamming it’s head into the door trying to get out.

Anyway, that piece of shit bit me on the leg once and I gave it a Joe Frazier left hook right to the dome and it didn’t even flinch. I lit it up with all of my being and it just shook it off and kept acting like a retard.

That’s my dog fighting experience. I consider it an L.
You could fuck up one coyote
 

Jim Norton’s Wife's Cock

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Well we obviously also didn't meant the puppy bullldogs who are 1 month old.


:colin_sm:
I know. I mean your run of the mill "family" Pitbull dog. They aren't very big nor muscular, and it would still be a pretty tough fight but i reckon i could beat one. When you say Pitbull, people instantly picture the huge nigger ones. Most of them are just medium sized, athletic dogs. A Rottweiler would be harder due to them almost always being bigger and stronger, i used to have a Rottie and it was as strong as an Ox.
 

Jims_Maroon_Pants

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I reckon i have a 50/50% chance of beating one shitbull as long as it's not one of those oversized meathead ones they use in dog fights. While it's mauling my arm i could probably choke it out with the other. Or knock it out with a kick before it lunges at me. I reckon i could also beat a nigger.
I was going to say the same thing. Plus you can pick it up and slam it on the concrete
 

Jim Norton’s Wife's Cock

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I was going to say the same thing. Plus you can pick it up and slam it on the concrete
Yeah man, plus the average Pitbull weighs around 16-27kg. It would be a pain in the ass wriggling about and mauling you, but you could fuck it up for sure by slamming it into the ground.. or gouge it's eyes out and kick it to death lol.
 

Jims_Maroon_Pants

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I always thought so but I saw one run by me randomly while I was at University and the thing was way bigger than I expected. It threw off my whole perception of which animals I could kick to death.
I was walking with some friends at this port in Greece at night, and this wharf rat ran across our path and I got so startled and without thinking I just kicked the fucking thing! It was so much bigger than any rat I'd seen in a pet store before. I swear this thing was the size of a small Chihuahua. Anyhow, all I managed to do was make it fly about 4 feet straight up. It landed and took off toward the water haha
 

TheGhostOfAbeVigoda

The Backbone of America
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I was walking with some friends at this port in Greece at night, and this wharf rat ran across our path and I got so startled and without thinking I just kicked the fucking thing! It was so much bigger than any rat I'd seen in a pet store before. I swear this thing was the size of a small Chihuahua. Anyhow, all I managed to do was make it fly about 4 feet straight up. It landed and took off toward the water haha
I used to work at a huge chicken farm that was full of mice. I'm pretty sure rodents can fall from any height and not die. It's fucking crazy. I've seen them fall the equivalent of a human falling from an apartment building roof and they just keep scurrying as soon as they hit the ground.
 
G

guest

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I'd take my chances with a raccoon. Got one on a homemade snare pole once and ruined his night. Get away from my homeless encampment you piece of shit raccoons.

A snare pole is just a broom handle with a hole through it slid through a steel pipe with a corresponding hole - bridge the holes with a steel cable and you're stranglin'.
 

Stent

jewery duty
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I could probably fuck up a whale.

seinfeld-golf.gif
 

Jesse Ventura

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I'd take my chances with a raccoon. Got one on a homemade snare pole once and ruined his night. Get away from my homeless encampment you piece of shit raccoons.

A snare pole is just a broom handle with a hole through it slid through a steel pipe with a corresponding hole - bridge the holes with a steel cable and you're stranglin'.

My buddy in high school used to walk dogs as a part time job. He had this Jack Russell off leash at a park and it chased a raccoon. The raccoon ran into a pond and the dog followed. The raccoon latched around the dogs head and drowned it. My buddy went into the pond and grabbed the coon as it thrashed and bit at him and he strung it up in a tree and whipped it to death with a thin stick.

He was a troubled youth.
 
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