New James Bond Movie

[Stetten's Long Thumbers]

I just saw a poster for a new James Bond movie. I'm going to bet my entire life savings of $17,000 that this is the plot:

James Bond has to train a new agent, who's going to be a white girl loaded with snippy sarcastic quips. He doesn't respect her until 1/3 into the movie where her quick thinking saves his life. At the end of the movie Bond gets shot, and he gives her the "you have to save the day speech". She gets the bad guy, comes back to find out that Bond didn't make it. Cut to her being congratulated for being promoted to the next 007. They actually fucking call her Jane Bond. They steal the same exact ending from The Dark Knight Rises and show Daniel Craig living his retirement out somewhere in Asia or South America.

 

[aRTie02150]

I just saw a poster for a new James Bond movie. I'm going to bet my entire life savings of $17,000 that this is the plot:

James Bond has to train a new agent, who's going to be a white girl loaded with snippy sarcastic quips. He doesn't respect her until 1/3 into the movie where her quick thinking saves his life. At the end of the movie Bond gets shot, and he gives her the "you have to save the day speech". She gets the bad guy, comes back to find out that Bond didn't make it. Cut to her being congratulated for being promoted to the next 007. They actually fucking call her Jane Bond. They steal the same exact ending from The Dark Knight Rises and show Daniel Craig living his retirement out somewhere in Asia or South America.

17k isn't bad for savings

 

[Stetten's Long Thumbers]

No Time to Die - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org

Top fucking kek, already made Bond a chick. I swear I saw the ad on my way back home and came straight to post this. Except I clearly wasn't woke enough cause she's a black girl, probably a lesbian. They did not however, call her Jane Bond.

• Lashana Lynch as Nomi:
  A new "00" agent who entered active service some time after Bond's retirement and was assigned the 007 number.[22][23] Lynch has said that she hopes her character brings a new layer of relatability to the world of espionage: "When you're dealing with a franchise that has been slick for so many years, I wanted to throw a human spin on it—to deal with anxiety and be someone who's figuring it out, completely on her toes".[24]

 

[JoshFromMichigan]

You're not far off. Bond is already retired and the new 007 is a butt ugly black woman.

 

[Stetten's Long Thumbers]

You're not far off. Bond is already retired and the new 007 is a butt ugly black woman.

Guaranteed LGBTQ and they trans her up for the next one, and actually name her James Bond

 

[Punished Dan Mullen]

wtf...i got one of those nokia phone like 2 years ago and they kept saying its 007 related, cant believe this shit is still on going, who the fuck care???

 

[fenrir]

You're not far off. Bond is already retired and the new 007 is a butt ugly black woman.

Nice Groucho Marx eyebrows, stupid

 

[Will Tate]

Last good Bond movie was Casino Royale.
However I grant special dispensation to the opening car chase scene in Quantum of Solace and the car chase through Rome in Spectre, that shit was lit af tbqh witchoo nigga.

 

[sShenaniganz]

James Bail Bond

 

[Cuphead]

Spectre was fucking terrible and I expect this will be too.

 

[Stetten's Long Thumbers]

You Only Nig Twice

 

[analeggsalad]

 

[Snake]

Don't care for anything beyond Goldeneye.

 

[SensibleKeks]

There's no need to throw a tantrum Ms. Bond. White moves first in chess.

 

[guest]

I was 'bout to make a payment. I needs ma car fo work! Yes I do! I works fo' the gov'mint. Y'all makin' a mistake fo' real. Don't touch me! Heeelp! Dis white boy attackin' me an shit! Tryin'a steal my car!

 

[WigwardFromSouthHampton]

Daniel Craig sucks. Boring ape. Casino Royale was his only good movie. Skyfall was shit and gay too btw.

 

[bumbum8]

Don't care for anything beyond Goldeneye.

View attachment 6547

I don't know, the one where that chick Bond was supposed to be in love with goes all "you can't kill me, you love me too much!" and he instantly shoots her dead made me laugh pretty hard.

 

[Punished Dan Mullen]

i would die happy if the next bond looks like this



anyway this is the phone i got it was already a year old when they have this negress use it, i wouldve gotten a chinaman 5G phone if i knew they would waste their money on this kind of shit instead of using it on system fixes and updates. at this point this model is almost 2 years old and this fucking movie isnt even out yet wtf are they doing?

 

[TheRevAlJolson]

17k isn't bad for savings

You'd have to be independently wealthy to have that kind of money laying around

 

[Cyberatorquer]

I hope they inject the same brilliant comedy into James Bond as they did with the Ghostbusters remake. Then it will silence the doubters forever