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Under USATF Competition Rules and Pat's own admission - he cheated

AntSucks

★ ★ ★ ★ ☆
Forum Clout
20,827
The Brewers Mini Marathon is USATF certified course, so that means it must be measured according to the principle of the "Shortest Possible Route". Here's a diagram from their handbook.

Notice how the examples follow the contours of roads. Notice the LACK OF CURB CUTTING

Screenshot_1.png



Screenshot_2.png


At 14:15 of "The Interviews Part 3" he overexplains his cheating as "twisted his ankle stepping off of a curb wrong".

It's a USATF certified course, Pat.

WE GOT YOU

columbo.jpg


Marathon police are coming, nigga. Wait quietly for the knock

7153934-3x2-940x627.jpg
 

CarolMaxheinie

Runner, Unlike Fatrick
Forum Clout
21,344
Ok gonna make some notes as i listen to fatass whine about his mini-marathon and enjoy my post run shit. I hate him so much. Sorry in advance for the weaponized running autism.

Tl:dr: Fat Pat makes several wild claims, and I punch through those with FACTS and LOGIC. 🐮

Outright Lies:

- He says “runs half marathons” [13:50 of Part 3] as if he’s actively in shape or training. He couldn’t run 1.31 miles much less 13.1. I hate him.

- “they (me and the handsome and eloquent Coonskin) are there… to send harassing texts and leave harassing voicemails”. Not so. I have never texted or called Patso. Not even once. He just wishes I did because he loves me and @covidcumia and wants a thruple.

- “There’s no way they could have seen the timing mat data”.Not so. Sometime between 2018 and now, they consolidated the data from ChronoTrack and they’re using some other system now. Here’s their own website with timing mat and photo data for the life of the race:

Results and Photos - Milwaukee Brewers Mini Marathon

Choose to run a half-marathon, 10K or 5K and race through Milwaukee and around the field warning track at Miller Park!
www.race-brewers.com
www.race-brewers.com
I have screenshots showing two “NA” entries, meaning he did not cross the mats at the 5K (3.1 mile), 10K (6.2 mile) and 15K (9.3 mile). He did cross at 5 and 10 mile. These correspond perfectly to the map showing where he cut the out and back portions just after the 2 mile marker and the bigger cut was miles 7 and 10

- “Not everyone gets their picture taken at every spot” [14:45 of Part 3]. Not so, chubs. See the numerous examples on the 2016 race page. Most runners have ~30 pictures from the course. Fatass has around a dozen. He’s conspicuously and autistically farting up the finish - we’ve all had a great laugh at his ugly face trying to run past the limping soccer moms. Not much from the course itself, backing up my finding that he cut the course in the middle section(s).

Bullshit from Fatass:

- Pretends not to know how to pronounce “Maxheinie”. He loves me and knows my name on here, as well as real life.

- “Five miles into it I stepped off a curb”. [14:16
of Part 3] Not so, this isn’t how races work. There’s no curb five miles into any sanctioned race, ever. He was fat and out of shape but wanted the Twitter dopamine hits from claiming to have finished, so he cut the course. If he tripped over a curb, it’s because he was off course waddling toward a part to cut back in.

-“Even though *chuckle and pause to think of how to continue the lie* that was my far my worst marathon time”. [14:15 of Part 3] Not so. Pat child didn’t run a marathon. He didn’t even run a half. He’s clearly lying here and it’s obvious he has never run a marathon and has no idea what it’s all about. The fat, lying asshole deserves the same fate as fellow marathon liar Dr Frank Meza. As someone who works my ass off to run marathons competitively, it irks me that he’s sitting on his couch stealing running valor for Twitter attention.

- “5000 participants… (at the 2016 Brewers Mini Marathon)”.[14:40 in the Part 3Not so. 1,831 runners completed the race. Patso came in at a pathetic 1570th place. Proof: https://results.chronotrack.com/event/results/event/event-23424

- He says he walked the rest of the course [14:58 of Part 3] after stepping off a curb Mile 5. Then says he “ran the entire course” [14:50 of Part 3] Which is it, lardass?

Projecting Pat:

- This fat fuck says I’m obsessed with him but he visits my Instagram (currently 282K followers) daily and randomly block and unblocks. Sad to say he probably unblocks, jerks off to me, then blocks me back out of shame. Don’t sweat it Piggy, lots of old fat trolls like you jerk off to me. You’ll never get the real thing so enjoy pig
 

AntSucks

★ ★ ★ ★ ☆
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20,827
Yes, you're correct. Marathon photos are basically video run through software that identifies the runner based on their tag. They will get everybody who passes the camera, provided their tag is readable, but even if it isn't they will be in the same photo as someone else. There are probably other pictures of him available by searching other people's names. Look in the seniors category for names with possible similar times.
 

archive_bot

Forum Clout
5,871
i'm not projecting, child. Just as I don't cheat at my half marathons. These are both delusions your obsession demands you believe.




The depths of your delusions really are astounding, child. No, little one, I have no plans to cheat at this half-marathon, or any others. I have never bragged anywhere about sub 2 hour half marathon times, because I have never run a sub 2 hour half. That's my goal, which I've been working towards for several years. My best time is 2:15, and yes, that was at a bibbed, matted, and timed race that your "friend" is free to inspect to his heart's content. It will show I ran the full race, slower than I'd like, but without cutting corners. Just like all the others I've run. Listen, kiddo. I get it. You lack discipline and ambition. You would never be able to finish even a half marathon honestly, because you don't have the mental fortitude or commitment needed to put in the months of training towards even a modest goal. So you assume that everyone else must be cheating, just like you would have to. As always, the demonstrably false things you choose to believe end up saying a whole lot more about you than they do about the people you're trying, and failing, to troll.


Sweetheart, that's not how any of this works. Those icons are aid and water stations, not timing mats. There are many more mats in a given race placed so people can't take advantage of the shortcuts you pointed out, and no, I didn't cut any of them, as the official mat trap times show. I never have. I've run every foot of every race I've entered. If I'd cut through either of the places you pointed out, I would have missed at least one mat, probably more, and would have been immediately DQed as soon as I crossed the finish line. My time would not have appeared in the official results at all. That's the whole point of the mat system. And no, I've never had a 30 minute improvement year over year. My personal best time of 2:15 comes from a few years back. My personal worst time of 2:40 something was my last race two years ago because at around Mile 5 I hit a pothole at an odd angle and gave myself a high ankle sprain which I had to run with through the rest of the eight miles of the race at a significantly reduced speed. Again, the actual mat trap times reflect this. I've never said I was a fast distance runner, because I'm not and never will be. This isn't about competition for me, but fulfilling personal goals and milestones, even if they are modest ones compared to many people. There's absolutely no reason or motivation for me to cheat, because I'd only be cheating myself. It's almost endearing how desperate you are to believe your own lies. I understand, though. You, personally could never do even this simple thing because of the commitment and discipline it requires. So you project your shortcomings onto me, someone you are desperate to feel superior to based on, well, absolutely nothing. But the reality is million of people do it every year, or multiple times per year. And even the very slowest among them is still better than you.
 
G

guest

Guest
Ok gonna make some notes as i listen to fatass whine about his mini-marathon and enjoy my post run shit. I hate him so much. Sorry in advance for the weaponized running autism.

Tl:dr: Fat Pat makes several wild claims, and I punch through those with FACTS and LOGIC. 🐮

Outright Lies:

- He says “runs half marathons” [13:50 of Part 3] as if he’s actively in shape or training. He couldn’t run 1.31 miles much less 13.1. I hate him.

- “they (me and the handsome and eloquent Coonskin) are there… to send harassing texts and leave harassing voicemails”. Not so. I have never texted or called Patso. Not even once. He just wishes I did because he loves me and @covidcumia and wants a thruple.

- “There’s no way they could have seen the timing mat data”.Not so. Sometime between 2018 and now, they consolidated the data from ChronoTrack and they’re using some other system now. Here’s their own website with timing mat and photo data for the life of the race:

[HEADING=2][URL='http://www.race-brewers.com/race-info/results-and-photos/']Results and Photos - Milwaukee Brewers Mini Marathon[/URL][/HEADING]
Choose to run a half-marathon, 10K or 5K and race through Milwaukee and around the field warning track at Miller Park!
www.race-brewers.com
[URL='http://www.race-brewers.com']www.race-brewers.com[/URL]
I have screenshots showing two “NA” entries, meaning he did not cross the mats at the 5K (3.1 mile), 10K (6.2 mile) and 15K (9.3 mile). He did cross at 5 and 10 mile. These correspond perfectly to the map showing where he cut the out and back portions just after the 2 mile marker and the bigger cut was miles 7 and 10

- “Not everyone gets their picture taken at every spot” [14:45 of Part 3]. Not so, chubs. See the numerous examples on the 2016 race page. Most runners have ~30 pictures from the course. Fatass has around a dozen. He’s conspicuously and autistically farting up the finish - we’ve all had a great laugh at his ugly face trying to run past the limping soccer moms. Not much from the course itself, backing up my finding that he cut the course in the middle section(s).

Bullshit from Fatass:

- Pretends not to know how to pronounce “Maxheinie”. He loves me and knows my name on here, as well as real life.

- “Five miles into it I stepped off a curb”. [14:16
of Part 3] Not so, this isn’t how races work. There’s no curb five miles into any sanctioned race, ever. He was fat and out of shape but wanted the Twitter dopamine hits from claiming to have finished, so he cut the course. If he tripped over a curb, it’s because he was off course waddling toward a part to cut back in.

-“Even though *chuckle and pause to think of how to continue the lie* that was my far my worst marathon time”. [14:15 of Part 3] Not so. Pat child didn’t run a marathon. He didn’t even run a half. He’s clearly lying here and it’s obvious he has never run a marathon and has no idea what it’s all about. The fat, lying asshole deserves the same fate as fellow marathon liar Dr Frank Meza. As someone who works my ass off to run marathons competitively, it irks me that he’s sitting on his couch stealing running valor for Twitter attention.

- “5000 participants… (at the 2016 Brewers Mini Marathon)”.[14:40 in the Part 3Not so. 1,831 runners completed the race. Patso came in at a pathetic 1570th place. Proof: [URL]https://results.chronotrack.com/event/results/event/event-23424[/URL]

- He says he walked the rest of the course [14:58 of Part 3] after stepping off a curb Mile 5. Then says he “ran the entire course” [14:50 of Part 3] Which is it, lardass?

Projecting Pat:

- This fat fuck says I’m obsessed with him but he visits my Instagram (currently 282K followers) daily and randomly block and unblocks. Sad to say he probably unblocks, jerks off to me, then blocks me back out of shame. Don’t sweat it Piggy, lots of old fat trolls like you jerk off to me. You’ll never get the real thing so enjoy pig
also this:

milwaukee 9.10.16.JPG



I'm no @CarolMaxheinie but I run now and then and theres no way in hell I could run 13 miles in a hoodie and pants like that when it's 61-68 degrees outsdie. no one who runs would even leave the house like that, its insane
 
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8,540
Milwaukee-Half.jpg


So this is a coincidence the upcoming Milwaukee half-marathon goes right by his house. But it's the part of the course that would be easiest to cheat at, going from mile marker 4 to mile marker 6.

Look at how close the 5 mile marker is to the hovel:

marathon.jpg


Pat can use his anger to motivate him into running. Lose the fat he's put on, then when the Milwaukee mini-marathon happens complete it without cheating, maybe have Niki waiting to take a nice sweaty picture of you for the twitter. The results will come back that you didn't cheat and Carol will be "defeated", at least in your head.

Or you can continue to sit on your couch with your blanky and lie about your old athletic accomplishments that no stranger cares about.
 

CarolMaxheinie

Runner, Unlike Fatrick
Forum Clout
21,344
Imagine you're running with the pack and everything is going normal, until you see some fat blob veer off the course and immediately eat shit. The laughter from seeing that would kill any possible chance of a PR

I would literally injure a rib laughing at that! Of course, I would miss it because I would be way ahead of fat losers like Patso. I guess the volunteer sweepers making sure people get off the course would feel like they won the laughter lottery.
 
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8,540
Don't suppose there's time for Carol to assemble a crack team of his running buddies to enter this and yell "child" and "quietly is the key" when they go by 2811 N. Oakland Ave.

Just take a nice selfie on that Newberry Avenue turn that's 2 blocks from his house. Upload it to the instagram, maybe with a coded message. THE THRILL OF RUNNING MAKES ME FEEL LIKE A CHILD!
 

HotDogJoe

Professional leech since 1994. Anyone can do it.
Forum Clout
79,959
I'm just sat here laughing that a random Reddit post from September 2018 with a total of 13 comments about some sci fi author who "seems feisty" has led to all this.

We've got fucking diagrams, detailed maps and weather records from 2016; pictures, tweets and quotes - all to prove a fat nobody from Wisconsin cheated at a mini marathon 5 years ago. That's not even mentioning the 9 month undercover operation that involved multiple cyberstlakers, a NYC club owner, disgraced ex cop and apparently a Rockstar employee - all so we could laugh at the world's self-aware man.

The CIA probably doesn't go to these lengths trying to uncover national security threats.

I fucking love this place.
 

Slackjawed Cow

I laugh at them because they're all the same.
Forum Clout
268,558
I would literally injure a rib laughing at that! Of course, I would miss it because I would be way ahead of fat losers like Patso. I guess the volunteer sweepers making sure people get off the course would feel like they won the laughter lottery.
Imagine being way out in front and you see this tubby fool jump out of the bushes into the race.

 

Easily_Remembered

It looks like she don't have an ass crack lmao
Forum Clout
67,880
That's some prime copypasta material right there.

And the sheer fact that he writes such a convoluted, essay length word salad about it just makes him look that much guiltier. I mean, the overly explaining, ridiculously detailed lie is practically a trope.

Someone should have, "No child, you didn't / No child, it wasn't" that entire thing, lie by lie.
 
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