Sometimes I'd like to eat food and not have it fuck my stomach up

[Sgt Zogbot Delta Operator]

Tell us a story about it.

 

[TheGhostOfAbeVigoda]

Tell us a story about it.

I don't tell stories no more.

 

[TheGhostOfAbeVigoda]

I don't tell stories no more.

"Go get your fuckin' storybox"

 

[Sgt Zogbot Delta Operator]

I don't tell stories no more.

You're a good boy.

 

[chiquita banana]

Really abe? I had no idea!





















Edit: I’d like to point out that I specifically requested management enable multi-quote so that I could do this to you more easily.

Tomatoes are one of the worst things for acidity. Sausage and pepperoni have preservatives so they are worse than regular meat for acidity. Cheese is heavy so it's hard to digest. If it's pan crust then it has oil.

I could eat Pizza Hut without any issue but if I ate like that for 2-3 days, incl coffee, liquor, coca cola etc. then I would start to get a lot of acidity and have to go back to a less acidic diet.

 

[Hudson Margera-Hughes]

Like 90% of anything I consume gives me hardcore heartburn/indigestion/whatever bitch stomach problem. I'm sick of it. SICKOFIT!

I live off generic Walgreens esomeprazole! Take one or two every single day first thing in the morn. NOT that faggot ass fake scam bullshit Omeprazole trash! It has to have "es" at the beginning. Esomeprazole! Fawwwwkin' works wonders for acid reflux/indigestion!
That shit rules. You can eat all kinds of garbage you're not supposed to and still walk around like Mr. Iron Guts Eternal. With that said, your asshole may pay the price dearly later on, but up until then it's bon appetite, nigga!

 

[Hudson Margera-Hughes]

Omeprazole brotherman, change your life. Eat more ginger and drink lemon tea. Dr. Hellhole is here to help - sit down at certified Psychiatrist @Phish's anxiety relief booth and boof the answer to all your problems.

Bro, Omeprazole is GARBAGE! It's Esomeprazole that rules! If there is no "es" then there is no digest!

In fact, Esomeprazole's slogan on the packaging is a take off of Johnny Cochran's... "If yellow bile isn't coating your shit then you must acquit!"

 

[Hudson Margera-Hughes]

I'm a Tums/Gaviscon man. I don't drink pink liquid because that's fucking gay as shit.

Heard they make a white milky/watery version of it and they swear *wink wink* that it's not made to look like and have the consistency of cum to humiliate and/or turn men/boys into flagrant, flaming homosexuals. The box itself says "side effects may include a bout of HIV, high fevers and bright red bleeding sores inside your anus. If you have any of these side effects DO NOT call 911, instead call yourself a nigger nosed kike boi and jump head first off the tall bridge... Nigger."

 

[Africa.com]

I'm allergic to corn, and only corn. I was on River Street in Savannah on Saturday and I stopped and ate at a seafood place. Couldn't resist and got hushpuppies for a side bc they were served with honey cinnamon butter. I've been pissing out of my asshole ever since. When I was a younger man I might feel this way for a half a day, but it's getting worse. I love corn but I can't live like this, what should I do? I'll hang up and listen

 

[Steve Ramone]

I used to get awful heartburn no matter what I did. Turns out it was the brand of beer I was drinking. Switched to Budweiser and have never had a problem since.

 

[TheGhostOfAbeVigoda]

I'm allergic to corn, and only corn. I was on River Street in Savannah on Saturday and I stopped and ate at a seafood place. Couldn't resist and got hushpuppies for a side bc they were served with honey cinnamon butter. I've been pissing out of my asshole ever since. When I was a younger man I might feel this way for a half a day, but it's getting worse. I love corn but I can't live like this, what should I do? I'll hang up and listen

Isn't there some form of corn in like everything?

 

[Africa.com]

Isn't there some form of corn in like everything?

I don't get the reaction from corn syrup etc.

 

[TheGhostOfAbeVigoda]

I don't get the reaction from corn syrup etc.

I love corn.

 

[Turry Precision ™®©]

I used to get heartburn from the gel caps I was selling 2CB in but that's it. Cast iron stomach, brushed aluminium leg for the fawkin win.

 

[Africa.com]

I love corn.

Who doesn't? If/when my wife gets a promotion and I can retire in 10 years, I'm gonna do a food truck and it's gonna be corn heavy, pal

 

[Hudson Margera-Hughes]

I'm allergic to corn, and only corn. I was on River Street in Savannah on Saturday and I stopped and ate at a seafood place. Couldn't resist and got hushpuppies for a side bc they were served with honey cinnamon butter. I've been pissing out of my asshole ever since. When I was a younger man I might feel this way for a half a day, but it's getting worse. I love corn but I can't live like this, what should I do? I'll hang up and listen

 

[guest]

I try my best to ignore things that people I like do that disturb me. Terry had a posting pictures of super malnourished dogs phase. I didn't like that, so I just pretended I didn't see it. I used to try to ignore your poop art, but I've even grown to appreciate it.

Abe, if you're gonna masturbate to feces it's probably better psychologically if you do it to dog shit that's whitened. I know you can't get those anymore but I've got some on a thumbdrive that are from the early 90's. Primo shit.

It's less personal if the poo picks are unfresh and interfeces. Straight sex is also an option.

 

[WifeStoreWill]

I’ll second whoever said to do Omeprazole. I did a 14 day course of that and I was good for like 6 months. Got it at Costco for peanuts.

 

[Hudson Margera-Hughes]

Who doesn't? If/when my wife gets a promotion and I can retire in 10 years, I'm gonna do a food truck and it's gonna be corn heavy, pal

Make sure you use ex-lax instead of cooking oil for everything and then put a nice, brand new porta potty right next to the truck but always keep a padlock on it so niggas gotta shit right down their legs into their shoes and stand there in while you loff and loff and give 'em a good ol'

 

[TheGhostOfAbeVigoda]

Abe, if you're gonna masturbate to feces it's probably better psychologically if you do it to dog shit that's whitened. I know you can't get those anymore but I've got some on a thumbdrive that are from the early 90's. Primo shit.

It's less personal if the poo picks are unfresh and interfeces. Straight sex is also an option.

I don't masturbate to it. It's still gross. I just appreciate CHH's craft. He should go on NPS and have an in-depth pontificating session on the art of poop comedy with Dan "Danny Dogshit" Mullen. He sells some sort of rubber dogshit software.

@chocolatehellhole give em some poop.