Joseph Cumia is opening a guitar shop out of his house

[NoBacon]

I can see angry customers banging on his door over poor work and Joe telling Layla and Carol to get down, be quiet, and act like they aren’t home.

“It’s a good thing I wasn’t HOME or he would have been in BIG trouble” as he hides upstairs.

 

[JebJoh]

His “my retirement years” gimmick is hilarious. He hasn’t worked steadily or paid into social security, let alone held down a serious job in like 40 years. Just because he turns 65 doesn’t mean he’s automatically “retired” lmao.

Also, can he run a business out of the condo?

He’s going to run it like a military operation. Anything that can’t be fixed using Layla’s arts and crafts scissors will be returned broken.

I see my local guitar shop is installing a laser measuring system that measures and balances every part of a guitar so the tech can repair everything perfectly. I’m sure Joes repairs will be done with similar precision.

 

[Anthony's Lime Rickey]

He’s going to run it like a military operation. Anything that can’t be fixed using Layla’s arts and crafts scissors will be returned broken.

I see my local guitar shop is installing a laser measuring system that measures and balances every part of a guitar so the tech can repair everything perfectly. I’m sure Joes repairs will be done with similar precision.

It’s really not some hobby Joe thinks he can just do. His only experience if I had guess might be restringing his chink guitars, which makes him an expert!

 

[JebJoh]

The comments are gold
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Joe is going to use this “business” as an excuse to sniff glue all day.

Except he only has Elmer’s arts and crafts glue. His whole workbench is just junk. A few pliers, a pack of screwdrivers he bought at the supermarket and some glue.

 

[JebJoh]

It’s really not some hobby Joe thinks he can just do. His only experience if I had guess might be restringing his chink guitars, which makes him an expert!

His guitars don’t break because they barely get used.

 

[JebJoh]

Joe is literally stealing his uncle's claim to fame, and trying to use his name and his reputation to cash in, but only after he's dead. Joe doesn't know fuck all about guitar repair/building, woodworking, craftsmanship, tools and etc. He did have the opportunity to learn it, but that would have been real work, so like a Cumia, Joe shied away from that, and just stuck to his bullshit cover band nonsense instead. Now the guy is gone, and there's Joe, greedily trying to piggyback on his uncle's craft, like it's his craft too. Just absolutely shameless, and lowdown.

His uncles shop shut down for awhile. Why didn’t he contact Joe to fill in after he got sick? He could have kept the business running.

 

[captainjapan]

He had to take photos of himself eating sushi and do a survey of the price of eggs for Trump

 

[Dusty Dan]

* ring ring *

"Hello, Joe's Moooooosic Repair Services"

"Oh good afternoon. I recently refretted my vintage Gibson Les Paul with Jescar stainless steel frets. Now I’m experiencing inconsistent intonation, particularly on the high E and B strings when playing above the 12th fret. The frets are leveled and crowned perfectly, the nut slots are set to proper height and angle, and the bridge saddles are correctly adjusted. However, the strings feel slightly stiffer than before. Could this be related to the stainless steel frets altering the guitar's overall setup or neck relief, or is it more likely an issue with the fretwire tang affecting the neck’s geometry?"

*click*

 

[JebJoh]

It’s really not some hobby Joe thinks he can just do. His only experience if I had guess might be restringing his chink guitars, which makes him an expert!

He did show photos of himself pulling hardware off one of his guitars, the only thing I remember about the photo was that all the wires were black and different lengths so to replace the pickup he had to cram the wires back into the hole. Looked shoddy but im no guitar expert like Joe.

 

[TaintofGeorge]

If his house or whatever is in a zoning area for business he's fucked. A call to Codes in his area and they will shut it down.

I'm amazed that a grown man lives his life this way. He's the lowest of the low. Pure, unadulturated SCUM

 

[lowend73]

* ring ring *

"Hello, Joe's Moooooosic Repair Services"

"Oh good afternoon. I recently refretted my vintage Gibson Les Paul with Jescar stainless steel frets. Now I’m experiencing inconsistent intonation, particularly on the high E and B strings when playing above the 12th fret. The frets are leveled and crowned perfectly, the nut slots are set to proper height and angle, and the bridge saddles are correctly adjusted. However, the strings feel slightly stiffer than before. Could this be related to the stainless steel frets altering the guitar's overall setup or neck relief, or is it more likely an issue with the fretwire tang affecting the neck’s geometry?"

*click*

‘’Hey Joe, my Rickenbacker has 2 truss rods, can you adjust for me ?’’

’’do you have a PLEK machine ?’’

Joe, are you an authorized Dealer ? Fender and Gibson would like to know you are selling counterfeit goods. Im guessing all his uncles stuff is sitting in a garage. I don’t think Joe has enough room

 

[JebJoh]

‘’Hey Joe, my Rickenbacker has 2 truss rods, can you adjust for me ?’’

’’do you have a PLEK machine ?’’

Joe, are you an authorized Dealer ? Fender and Gibson would like to know you are selling counterfeit goods. Im guessing all his uncles stuff is sitting in a garage. I don’t think Joe has enough room

His uncle has his own kids. Even if they aren’t guitarists his guitars sell for over 10 grand. It’s their inheritance and we already know Joe stole and sold one on reverb when his uncle got sick.

 

[JebJoh]

‘’Hey Joe, my Rickenbacker has 2 truss rods, can you adjust for me ?’’

’’do you have a PLEK machine ?’’

Joe, are you an authorized Dealer ? Fender and Gibson would like to know you are selling counterfeit goods. Im guessing all his uncles stuff is sitting in a garage. I don’t think Joe has enough room

Park machine, that’s the name I couldn’t remember. I was told those sell for 100 grand for the pro version. Joe might get by with a plek station but I think you need to be certified to use it commercially.

If Joe wants to adjust all of his guitars using a plek station to diagnose the deficiencies of Chinese made instruments in a legit music shop, it would cost him 20 grand.

 

[TorquieTwoBeers]

Except he only has Elmer’s arts and crafts glue. His whole workbench is just junk. A few pliers, a pack of screwdrivers he bought at the supermarket and some glue.

That stood out to me, too. Doesn't have a work bench in a designated space with specialized tools. Just has a card table in the corner of his dining room with a bunch of cheap, basic tools that look like bottom-of-the-barrel quality. Like when you're at Lowe's and you see all of those shitty flat head screwdrivers that don't even have a brand name for $1.49. That's where Joe shops. Not even Harbor Freight/Pittsburgh quality.

 

[lowend73]

That stood out to me, too. Doesn't have a work bench in a designated space with specialized tools. Just has a card table in the corner of his dining room with a bunch of cheap, basic tools that look like bottom-of-the-barrel quality. Like when you're at Lowe's and you see all of those shitty flat head screwdrivers that don't even have a brand name for $1.49. That's where Joe shops. Not even Harbor Freight/Pittsburgh quality.

Im sure he’s got the Stew Mack tools for a genuine Joe Cumia instrument ‘’set up”. Joe is no better than crackheads who will loot a friends house given the chance. Hopefully the Uncles kids see what is happening

 

[satanssockpuppet]

That stood out to me, too. Doesn't have a work bench in a designated space with specialized tools. Just has a card table in the corner of his dining room with a bunch of cheap, basic tools that look like bottom-of-the-barrel quality. Like when you're at Lowe's and you see all of those shitty flat head screwdrivers that don't even have a brand name for $1.49. That's where Joe shops. Not even Harbor Freight/Pittsburgh quality.

Joe posted some photos of his uncle in his guitar shop, and you could plainly see the well-used equipment in the background. It was obviously a working, actual shop. Meanwhile, Joe sets up an end table, plops a box of tools on the floor, and declares his workshop open for business, like that's the same thing. It shows you how little respect he has for the work, and for his uncle's gay career.

 

[JebJoh]

Joe posted some photos of his uncle in his guitar shop, and you could plainly see the well-used equipment in the background. It was obviously a working, actual shop. Meanwhile, Joe sets up an end table, plops a box of tools on the floor, and declares his workshop open for business, like that's the same thing. It shows you how little respect he has for the work, and for his uncle's gay career.

That post may have been a message to his cousins he probably thinks they should hand over his shop to Joe. I’m sure they already know what type of freeloader Joe is but who knows, he might end up with 20 pieces he has no idea how to use.

 

[JebJoh]

Joe posted some photos of his uncle in his guitar shop, and you could plainly see the well-used equipment in the background. It was obviously a working, actual shop. Meanwhile, Joe sets up an end table, plops a box of tools on the floor, and declares his workshop open for business, like that's the same thing. It shows you how little respect he has for the work, and for his uncle's gay career.

Who would trust him with a valuable guitar? Nobody hands an important piece of equipment to a guy on his stoop. They will expect to watch the entire diagnosis. No way anyone will leave their guitar in some dank basement with no humidity control, no real work bench, no paint fume hood and no tools that can’t be found in the trunk of a junkyard car. As dumb as he is, he must understand this. There is a grift afoot.

 

[satanssockpuppet]

Who would trust him with a valuable guitar? Nobody hands an important piece of equipment to a guy on his stoop. They will expect to watch the entire diagnosis. No way anyone will leave their guitar in some dank basement with no humidity control, no real work bench, no paint fume hood and no tools that can’t be found in the trunk of a junkyard car. As dumb as he is, he must understand this. There is a grift afoot.

There are two possibilities. One, he merely wants to show his social media followers how busy and successful he is, and how guitar magic is embedded in his DNA. Or two, he's trying to glom something from his uncle's estate, and believes "following in his footsteps" is the best way to do so. As you stated, anyone in the market for legitimate guitar repair/modification is going to flag Joe as a fraud within a few minutes.

 

[Smeckler's Powder]

Most of the guitar luthiers are grifters with little to no business acumen. They make their money from dentists who want “my dream guitar’. They end up just taking a bunch of deposits. Post a couple pictures of a stripped body and neck, and you are in business. Read up on Ed Roman. He was buying BC Rich guitars, stripping the necks and putting them on generic bodies.

Shit never knew that about Ed Roman, there used to be a store here that closed not long after I moved here