If SNL was legally bound to produce a sketch written exclusively by the Forums, what would you pitch and who would be in it?

[Mustard]

It can be as gruesome and un-PC as you want it to be, they have to do it.

 

[BrotherMan1488]

Certainly Joe Cumia drinking Child spit at the Big Apple Ranch

 

[BrotherMan1488]

Certainly Joe Cumia drinking Child spit at the Big Apple Ranch

Pete Davidson plays Joe naturally

 

[antlovessue]

Jews just handing out cash for 2 minutes

 

[Uncle Floyd]

Rape Lady. Dana Carvey plays a woman who gets raped on live TV every week.

 

[Nigger John]

John Stamos goes in a school and blows his head off while screaming “nigger”.

 

[Lamont & Tonelli]

Rape Lady. Dana Carvey plays a woman who gets raped on live TV every week.

The Nonconsensual Adventures of Professor Rape

John Stamos goes in a school and blows his head off while screaming “nigger”.

Jump Rope Fitness with... Uh... Jim.
Deep Thoughts with Abe Vigoda

 

[Brooke Shields]

I got 2

One would be a couple of guys at a bar or something, guy 1 says cool tattoo and 2 shows it to him and explains what it means.
Then guy 1 says I have something to show you, and brings out a crude drawing on looseleaf of something and starts explaining it (like homos with tattoos do).
And then he does it with another one, uses the popular phrasing that tattoo fags use or something, like "I got this one here after my trip in Utah" , the joke being it's just a picture he didn't "get" it and who cares it's just a picture(what tattoo people should realize about themselves)
I don't really have an ending, could be 2 asks 1 why he doesn't get these as tattoos and 1 exclaims "What do you think I'm fucking retarded?"


other one would be about how the music is done on the show Survivor, like behind the scenes stuff
You know how during transition shots there's always drums banging & jungle music and then some guy going "AHHHHHH" or "wwwUHH wwwUHHH wwwwAAAAHHH"
And the truth of it is some guy just has a black guy captured and does creative ways of torturing him in order to force those yellings. So it's filmed straight like a behind-scenes, and theres cuts to him using real instuments and equipment, and then there's a shot of him blow-torching a teeball bat which he then uses to slice down the guys back and he goes "OOOHHHH AAaghghhhh" and then they show how all of those sounds were used in a cutscene of the show.

I like #2

 

[JoeCumiawearsDIAPERS]

Some sort of bit centered around Anthony having sex with Sue Lightning and buying her tits.

Or maybe one about Anthony (Punkie Johnson) filing for divorce because he found out his older brother (Kenan Thomson) is having sex with Jennifer (host Ron Perlman).

Just something that makes everybody realize he’s a homo.

 

[StlakerFatti]

i would have the Weekend Update (w/ guest Dan Mullen) present the Fatrick swattings news storyline, then do an exposé on him bringing up his pedo connections, arrest record, fake tough guy act, bernell murder, torswats accusations etc and shortly after have the venue swatted for a bomb threat in the middle of the next segment

 

[Easily_Remembered]

I just want the loud, fat, black woman to play Anthony Cumia.

 

[HR@PaneraBread]

Chris Kuhn in court dropping as many O&A quotes and references into his defendant statements as possible.

 

[Cartoon Redux]

Holy shit none of you niggers are funny and SNL is the lowest bar for comedy there is

 

[StlakerFatti]

Holy shit none of you niggers are funny and SNL is the lowest bar for comedy there is

you haven't read my idea

 

[PogromStallone]

I'd just get the cast on stage and have them scream 'nigger' til they're all red in the face. It's not exactly funny but it will go down in the history books.

 

[StlakerFatti]

I'd just get the cast on stage and have them scream 'nigger' til they're all red in the face. It's not exactly funny but it will go down in the history books.

it's the simple concepts that are the most effective!

 

[DominusOdium]

Fucking yuuuuuuuuck.

 

[Mustard]

Fucking yuuuuuuuuck.

hence by the forums.

 

[JoeBrotheChildSpitGuzzler]

I'd just get the cast on stage and have them scream 'nigger' til they're all red in the face. It's not exactly funny but it will go down in the history books.

Jimmy Fallon as Says the N Word Guy. It will be shot on location in the South Bronx and nobody will come to his aid

 

[BrotherMan1488]

I just want the loud, fat, black woman to play Anthony Cumia.

Leslie left the show , child she needed to graze