How many retards were in your school

[Heyfellas]

At my school the retards had to do the teachers laundry, wash their cars, and do the gardening at the school. We had around 20 or so

 

[Meownaw]

Lotta retards in this thread, i tell you hwat.

Pat was in Paris the Eiffel Tower is actually 6 feet tall.

 

[eggfeller]

in elementary school it was just one severely autistic named Michael who would say things like “orange so-TAH!” (soda) over & over. since he was the only one it seemed like he was always at the center of some sort of controversy, which looking back i have a hard time remembering if it was more because he was problematic or the people around him were. his goddamn fuckhead parents were at the school all the goddamn time giving us talks about how michael was different & we needed to be patient with him, etc.

in 3rd grade the weird trend began of the special ed teacher handpicking 3-4 kids who would eat lunch with michael in the retard classroom on certain days. i of course was one of them just bc they knew the quiet/meek kids were pushovers & would comply. it actually wasn’t that bad because they brought in take-out a few times/incentivized it with food. michael wasn’t really annoying so i felt bad for him & have often wondered how his life turned out. doubtfully good. he added me on fb a few years ago & i felt like a piece of shit for wanting to ignore it.

in middle school i moved to a different town & got picked for retard patrol AGAIN. it actually had a name at this school: GAP (Guardian Angel Patrol). i was completely checked out by that point & wanted nothing to do with it/basically felt it was an insult/a sign of the teachers thinking i was a loser fag. i didn’t participate at all & was confronted about it & basically gave my resignation. i sometimes wonder about my actions regarding all that & the lack of guilt/compassion i felt makes it undeniable that i am indeed a bad person. some of those kids didn’t even make it past their teens. thank-you for sharing my journey

 

[chocolatehellhole]

We had a whole 10-12 person brigade of them that were isolated from normal functioning humans. One of them, Sergio, was PFG. His bit was grabbing their handler's tits. Someone I'd invite to a party for sure.

 

[BakersfieldChimp]

See the joke was I am the retard.
Annnnnnnnnd punt

Yeah but I wanted to tell my retard story too.

I was also the retard.

 

[guest]

i sometimes wonder about my actions regarding all that & the lack of guilt/compassion i felt makes it undeniable that i am indeed a bad person.

It's not genuine compassion if it's mandated. I wouldn't worry about it.

 

[Meownaw]

Yeah but I wanted to tell my retard story too.

I was also the retard.

Fawwwwwwk that one flew over my water head. Erock bring up a list of famous trainables. I love a good list *sniff*.

 

[PickleRickle]

They isolated our tards. They also had the retards making pizza pretzels that were then sold to the rest of the school. Fuckin disgusting. Thats some serious goyslop. Someone pulled a fast one on the tards once and handed them an IOU for a shit ton of these pretzels, so every time they'd drag the tard out to do the morning advertisement for their handmade travesties over the intercom, he would say "AN WEHMEMBEH NO I O YEWWWS"

Speaking of which, what the fuck is with the indentured servitude of forcing retards to bake bullshit?

 

[medium wyzzz]

Pretty wild when I was taking ceramics and the tard wrangler decided it would be a good idea to put the most non functioning one on a pottery wheel. Nigga had clay shooting all over the classroom running that wheel at full speed.

Based

 

[medium wyzzz]

At my school the retards had to do the teachers laundry, wash their cars, and do the gardening at the school. We had around 20 or so

that's smart.

 

[BonnieMcFarlaneMe2]

See the joke was I am the retard.
Annnnnnnnnd punt

I just wore a helmet on the bus because Bob Burnquist was my idol.

 

[DeadWithoutMyDavid]

They isolated our tards. They also had the retards making pizza pretzels that were then sold to the rest of the school. Fuckin disgusting. Thats some serious goyslop. Someone pulled a fast one on the tards once and handed them an IOU for a shit ton of these pretzels, so every time they'd drag the tard out to do the morning advertisement for their handmade travesties over the intercom, he would say "AN WEHMEMBEH NO I O YEWWWS"

Speaking of which, what the fuck is with the indentured servitude of forcing retards to bake bullshit?

Wasn't everyone afraid to eat food made by retards? Hey I asked for pepperoni, not pennies!

I feel like this was an O&A bit I'm repeating and I'm sorry. I'm sorry I did that.

 

[DeadWithoutMyDavid]

WWAW the army having a special retard division to clear mine fields and zerg charge machine gun nests? My numerous letters to the joint chiefs go unanswered.

 

[Libby Son Of Loin]

They isolated our tards. They also had the retards making pizza pretzels that were then sold to the rest of the school. Fuckin disgusting. Thats some serious goyslop. Someone pulled a fast one on the tards once and handed them an IOU for a shit ton of these pretzels, so every time they'd drag the tard out to do the morning advertisement for their handmade travesties over the intercom, he would say "AN WEHMEMBEH NO I O YEWWWS"

Speaking of which, what the fuck is with the indentured servitude of forcing retards to bake bullshit?

@TheGhostOfAbeVigoda worst nightmare

 

[guest]

Pat was in Paris the Eiffel Tower is actually 6 feet tall.

Fix your aspect ratio.

You’re going to the pound, catster. Enjoy it, we will.

 

[Dennyislife]

There was a plenty of kids with your bog standard learning difficulties but there was this one kid who would pick coins off the floor and was clearly on the spectrum. So out of the kindness of our hearts we would throw coins at him as hard as possible and he would pick up 5p and 2p coins all week. By the end he was making a few quid a week enough to buy himself something to eat.

Good times.

 

[PickleRickle]

Wasn't everyone afraid to eat food made by retards? Hey I asked for pepperoni, not pennies!

I feel like this was an O&A bit I'm repeating and I'm sorry. I'm sorry I did that.

Nobody else gave a fuck but me! I still cant believe it. Retard germs!? Are ya fuckin kidding me?

 

[chocolatehellhole]

Nobody else gave a fuck but me! I still cant believe it. Retard germs!? Are ya fuckin kidding me?

There was an auxiliary retard run "convenience store" in my school that was open during lunch periods. I remember making the teacher who was overseeing everything howl by stating "Service is so slow here, you'd think the place was run by a bunch of retards"

 

[TheGhostOfAbeVigoda]

The only retard I ever had in a class with me was this non-verbal wheelchair retard they'd wheel into our regular class for like two periods a day in grade 4. It was fucking distracting. Any time the kid made a noise everybody laughed. I remember one time, the kid sitting next to him got in shit because his handler put a kleenex up to the retard's face and he blew a massive load of snot into it. The kid next to him was like "Oh for FUCK'S sake" and stormed out of the room.

In highschool there was a whole fuckin gang of retards. They'd get moved around while everyone else was in class. Again, distracting. They'd go single file down the halls holding a rope. There were a bunch that just made high pitched screams and squeals the entire time and several of them wore sick skate helmets because they'd try to bounce their heads off the lockers repeatedly.

Then there was Gorgeous Gordon. The giant leader of the retards. He was "on" the football team. He'd come to the practices and everyone would just rile him the fuck up until he was chasing people around and he would always end up crushing someone. The coaches never discouraged fucking with him. He never got any playing time and when they would try to put him in the odd drill, he'd just level his own line. He'd get some Most Valuable Retard award at the end of the season. I see Gorgeous Gordon around sometimes. He's always still wearing his highschool football jacket. The last time I saw him he was standing on a hill on the side of the road trying to yank a shitty little crab apple off a tree, just giving it everything he had, and just as I was driving by he got it and stumbled backwards directly in front of my truck. I lost my shit on him. "NEXT TIME I'M NOT SLAMMIMG MY BRAKES, GORDON! NEXT TIME I'M RUNNING YOU THE FUCK OVER, RETARD! YOU CAN'T EVEN EAT THOSE FUCKING THINGS, THEY TASTE LIKE SHIT! STAY OUTTA THE FUCKING ROAD, RETARD!"

There's some sickening, disgusting shit that my school did too. At lunch time, you could go to the tard class and buy candy that the retards had handled, likely drooled on and stuffed into baggies with their booger fingers. And people would actually buy that shit every day. If anyone ever offered me any of that I'd be like "I'm not going to eat something that a fucking retard touched. Enjoy your extra sticky gummy whales." And they'd be like "Lighten up, Abe."