BREAKING: Oghenechovwe is in some deep shit in Los Angeles

[MySecondFatterAccount]

looks like the Mr Rogers puppet

 

[fricklefrackle]

Come on, this niggas way older than 39, right?

Has to be

 

[EllenTorquehorn]

I can’t comprehend preferring that to just killing myself.

Neither can they about half the time.

 

[JoeBrotheChildSpitGuzzler]

He’s never coming back.

Your lips to Mel's cock

 

[Jenna]

Oh shit I found a PDF of Destiny Delayed. The writing is definitely clunky in that ESL way but it's still more readable than Patrick's "use the thesaurus 3 times every sentence to sound smart".

I'm sure some of you are curious about the plot. It's about a magic machine that measures and extracts your destiny with a variety of multicolored gasses.

The story also opens with a 7-year-old girl getting spanked for no reason whatsoever:

 

[NoBacon]

If he really believes his nonsense about racism and imperialism is to blame and not his own illegal visa actions, why does he even want to come here so desperately?

He knows it’s bullshit and it’s a great place to be and just won’t take accountability. Those people never do and by those people I mean niggers.

 

[TorqueWheeler]

Oh shit I found a PDF of Destiny Delayed. The writing is definitely clunky in that ESL way but it's still more readable than Patrick's "use the thesaurus 3 times every sentence to sound smart".

I'm sure some of you are curious about the plot. It's about a magic machine that measures and extracts your destiny with a variety of multicolored gasses.

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The story also opens with a 7-year-old girl getting spanked for no reason whatsoever:

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I’m just happy my daughters only need to call me daddy without specifying which daddy I am.

 

[Jenna]

Is this legit an allegory about fucking kids? No wonder the SFWA gives him so much support.

 

[fricklefrackle]

I can’t comprehend preferring that to just killing myself.

 

[MySecondFatterAccount]

 

[Jenna]

I’m just happy my daughters only need to call me daddy without specifying which daddy I am.

Hey bro you mind if I "extract destiny" from your daughters? It's not technically illegal yet so you have nothing to worry about.

That's the plot of this story so far. There's two friends, one of them has a 7-year-old daughter, the other goes to work at a shady company that takes "destiny" from children. The one guy convinces the other guy it makes sense financially to let your 7-year-old daughter have her "destiny extracted".

 

[Dummy Gaynuts]

This guy takes a loud strong piss in the womens restroom and then rubs his flaccid tranny cock to the thought later

 

[Jenna]

Oh silly wife. This vague mysterious company doesn't want the destiny of a middle-aged housewife! They want the 7-year-old, that's how it is, it has to be hers.

 

[TorqueWheeler]

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Hey bro you mind if I "extract destiny" from your daughters? It's not technically illegal yet so you have nothing to worry about.

That's the plot of this story so far. There's two friends, one of them has a 7-year-old daughter, the other goes to work at a shady company that takes "destiny" from children. The one guy convinces the other guy it makes sense financially to let your 7-year-old daughter have her "destiny extracted".

Sounds totally legit. Have at it!

 

[Meownaw]

Election results are in. Couldnt tell ya if its good news or bad new to be honest witcha.

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Would you say it's infact a "tough one"?

 

[Jenna]

Oh shit the dad who sold his 7-year-old daughter just set off a destiny bomb at the bank HQ that ripped the destiny from everyone in a ten mile radius!

I know Mukoro would get his revenge but I never expected terrorism to be the solution. Lot of innocent bystanders in that 10 mile radius getting their destines stolen.

 

[captain_kamala]

Sounds like he had a miserable time here. Why would he want to come back?

 

[Meownaw]

International laws are just like amazon sales. You'll see when it all works out for him.

Silly me for thinking this experience would humble him not make him an even bigger NIGGER! Sorry Bam.

 

[Mr-Wrinkle-Paws]

Ooga have a brother? this is that monster that beat teacher up

 

[Jenna]

Okay all done. I give it 1 and a half stars, easily better than everything Patrick has ever written. Even with the weird "selling your daughter" allegory.

Ironically enough, it needs an editor. Donald is not a native English speaker, however I can see why people might enjoy that it's "authentic". But on the other hand, it would be extremely easy to polish the grammar, stop saying "destiny" every third word, things like that.

He's got an imagination at least, even if it does read like a shitty Black Mirror spec script. Plus the elevator pitch about an evil bank that steals people's destinies is simple and easy-to-understand. Compared to "In The Black", which is about... spy satellites going mysteriously quiet and there's an alien ship and there's a human ship and there's a billionaire who eats at Space Chilis and all three of them get pulled into a crazy conspiracy about these spy satellites.

The stuff with using children and how the bank doesn't want the destiny of a "middle-aged housewife" does bother me though, it really feels like some weird winkwink to the pedo members of the SFWA. Or maybe to how fucking kids is kinda acceptable in Africa if you have enough money? You could have at least put an 18+ limit on the destiny machine and have his 18-year-old daughter sell her destiny. The core story doesn't change, and there could have been some "I'm selling my destiny so I can afford college" in there.

But then I think, well these people taking destinies from children are clearly the "bad guys", but then the end (spoiler alert) the dad sets off the destiny bomb, the cops show up and kill him:

But then the destinies he stole get inherited by his daughter so she now has hundreds of destinies and is some sort of Jean Grey superhero:

And that's how the story ends. Is this a happy ending? Is she evil now? It's like good for her she got her destiny back, but now she's continuing the cycle by stealing hundreds of other peoples.

I dunno. I'm not going to say "destiny" again for like four years, I am very tired of that word.