WWAWD expiration dates?

[Brooke Shields]

share what you know is safe to eat DESPITE what the ""expiration date"" is

• I have no idea why hot sauce says to refrigerate after opening, but that's basic shit
• ranch is completely fine after being left out for 2 weeks at least
• milk is only ever bad if you can smell or taste that it's bad, so like ~2 weeks past label but it's fine since you can definitely tell if it's bad
• bread slices, if it gets mold on it just remove the moldy slices, the other ones are fine but you should obviously inspect it before making your next ham and cheese sandwich
• i've left taco meat on my stove for like 6 days (covered by pan lid) and nothing bad happened after eating it
• chicken is fine even after it gets slimy, you just need to cook it longer
• red meat the same, it looks more dead and bad but it's already dead rotting flesh, just cook it more
• eggs literally don't go bad, even the smelly rotten eggs can be eaten
• lettuce is good to eat even after it gets kinda brown and slimy, it's a different texture kinda so i can see how one wouldn't want to eat it
• tuna can stay out on your counter for weeks (the longest i've gone is 24ish days, it doesn't even smell bad

The bad

• ice tea mix put into a pitcher with water will go bad in less than week, mold will grow on the top
• non-heavily-processed cheese will get mold after like 3-4 days not refrigerated
• garlic goes bad in 5 weeks even after refrigerated
• ice cream will get freezer burn in 3 weeks
• your Brita filter and knockoffs need to be changed every 2 months, you can definitely taste the fluoride if not

 

[BonnieMcFarlaneMe2]

share what you know is safe to eat DESPITE what the ""expiration date"" is

• I have no idea why hot sauce says to refrigerate after opening, but that's basic shit
• ranch is completely fine after being left out for 2 weeks at least
• milk is only ever bad if you can smell or taste that it's bad, so like ~2 weeks past label but it's fine since you can definitely tell if it's bad
• bread slices, if it gets mold on it just remove the moldy slices, the other ones are fine but you should obviously inspect it before making your next ham and cheese sandwich
• i've left taco meat on my stove for like 6 days (covered by pan lid) and nothing bad happened after eating it
• chicken is fine even after it gets slimy, you just need to cook it longer
• red meat the same, it looks more dead and bad but it's already dead rotting flesh, just cook it more
• eggs literally don't go bad, even the smelly rotten eggs can be eaten
• lettuce is good to eat even after it gets kinda brown and slimy, it's a different texture kinda so i can see how one wouldn't want to eat it
• tuna can stay out on your counter for weeks (the longest i've gone is 24ish days, it doesn't even smell bad

The bad

• ice tea mix put into a pitcher with water will go bad in less than week, mold will grow on the top
• non-heavily-processed cheese will get mold after like 3-4 days not refrigerated
• garlic goes bad in 5 weeks even after refrigerated
• ice cream will get freezer burn in 3 weeks
• your Brita filter and knockoffs need to be changed every 2 months, you can definitely taste the fluoride if not

I was about to browbeat you for saying canned tuna can be left unrefridgerated until I realized that you meant tuna out of the can. I think I might be retarded.

 

[Kim_Jong_Poon_]

• i've left taco meat on my stove for like 6 days (covered by pan lid) and nothing bad happened after eating it

 

[BonnieMcFarlaneMe2]

View attachment 110529

Afterwards, I bet his toilet bowl looked like a chocolate hellhole.

 

[Jenna]

Fish you want to eat as soon as possible. It's the most disappointing thing in the world to eat a salmon you left in the fridge for 4 days.

 

[BonnieMcFarlaneMe2]

Fish you want to eat as soon as possible. It's the most disappointing thing in the world to eat a salmon you left in the fridge for 4 days.

You ever try to reheat a fish fry? Not PFG at all.

 

[Meownaw]

This thread triggers me.

 

[fusciasomething]

Your life sounds odd.

 

[Jenna]

You ever try to reheat a fish fry? Not PFG at all.

Of all the wacky reddit-tier workplace memes, "not reheating fish in the microwave" is the most accurate by far. Or at least second to "don't fucking steal my yogurt".

 

[BonnieMcFarlaneMe2]

@Jack_Horner , comment?

 

[bovinebrain]

bread slices, if it gets mold on it just remove the moldy slices, the other ones are fine but you should obviously inspect it before making your next ham and cheese sandwich

Eating a slice from a loaf of moldy bread is a bad idea. The mold you see is the tip of the iceberg, the invisible roots have penetrated deep into the rest of the loaf and are just as bad as eating the moldy piece. Same goes for soft cheeses - you can’t just cut away the bad parts, the whole thing is rooted in mold. That said, most species of mold on food are pretty harmless so you’ll be fine 99% of the time.

 

[Slackjawed Cow]

Hot sauce seems to be fine long after expiration date.

 

[Brooke Shields]

That said, most species of mold on food are pretty harmless so you’ll be fine 99% of the time.

Hey can you not shit up my helpful thread with bloviating paragraphs about how I'm 99% right?

 

[BonnieMcFarlaneMe2]

Hot sauce seems to be fine long after expiration date.

I accidentally ate siracha a year after being expired and it was fine.

 

[DMAN]

• milk is only ever bad if you can smell or taste that it's bad, so like ~2 weeks past label but it's fine since you can definitely tell if it's bad

Milk is almost the only thing I religiously follow the expiration date because it's never wrong. Sometimes the milk stinks a day before expiration.

• bread slices, if it gets mold on it just remove the moldy slices, the other ones are fine but you should obviously inspect it before making your next ham and cheese sandwich

I just dump the whole loaf if I find any mold. It also starts to smell like alcohol after a while and "sweats."

• i've left taco meat on my stove for like 6 days (covered by pan lid) and nothing bad happened after eating it

This is absolutely disgusting. On the rare night where I leave taco meat out after passing out, the smell of the dry taco meat is so disgusting... How did you even eat that shit? It literally turns into hard little mouse turds.

• chicken is fine even after it gets slimy, you just need to cook it longer
• red meat the same, it looks more dead and bad but it's already dead rotting flesh, just cook it more

I don't fool with meat or chicken. If it looks even slightly off, even if still within expiration, I just throw it out. I want to enjoy the meal.

• eggs literally don't go bad, even the smelly rotten eggs can be eaten

I used to eat a shitload of eggs, lately I just keep buying cartons and never touching them for weeks. A few months ago I cracked open an egg not knowing it was months old. It looked perfectly fine on the outside, but the inside was completely black and gooey. I was shocked. I had to clean my pan again, and from now on I break my eggs into a measuring cup or something first to ensure it's not a black goo egg.

• lettuce is good to eat even after it gets kinda brown and slimy, it's a different texture kinda so i can see how one wouldn't want to eat it

This is disgusting, I've gone to grab a head of lettuce from my crisper after having not 'checked in on it' in a while and found it completely liquify into brown sludge. Actually looked kinda like the aforementioned black egg yolk.

• tuna can stay out on your counter for weeks (the longest i've gone is 24ish days, it doesn't even smell bad

This puzzles me... Are you talking about a whole ass tuna fish just sitting on your counter? I used to work at a fish market and if you left tuna or salmon out, or didn't turn on the cooler, it would get awful really fast. I'm starting to question your living conditions, but then again I should have done that when you left taco meat out for a full week.

• non-heavily-processed cheese will get mold after like 3-4 days not refrigerated

This is fucking me up. There are people who deliberately eat moldy cheese, and you added cheese to the no fly list after saying old taco meat and tuna is fine. I am becoming a doubter of yours.

• garlic goes bad in 5 weeks even after refrigerated

I have been using the same giant jar of minced garlic for about a year and a half and have detected nothing strange.

What's in that taco meat??? Yeah!
Is it full of little chihuahua feet? Yeah!
Burritos made from rodents in the street? Yeah!
Do they just slap some sauce on it and heat? Yeah! Take it to the bridge!

Oh my god!!! Uh-Huh! Chalupas are such a delicious snack. Uh-Huh!
I like to buy and eat 'um by the sack. Uh-Huh!
But when their meat's alive, does it say "quack?" Uh-Huh! Take it to the chorus!

Is it beef? Or armadillo?
Is it beef? Cajun or black crow?
Is it beef? Or sliced hyena? From Argentina?
Is it beef? Or kangaroo skin?
Is it beef? Or is it penguin?
Is it beef? Or wild wombat?
Is it beef? Or rabid bobcat?

What's in that taco meat??? Yeah!
Is it full of little chihuahua feet? Yeah!
Burritos made from rodents in the street? Yeah!
Do they just slap some sauce on it and heat? Yeah! Take it to the bridge!

Oh my god!!! Uh-Huh! Chalupas are such a delicious snack. Uh-Huh!
I like to buy and eat 'um by the sack. Uh-Huh!
But when their meat's alive, does it say "quack?" Uh-Huh! Take it to the chorus!

Is it beef? Or armadillo?
Is it beef? Cajun or black crow?
Is it beef? Or sliced hyena? From Argentina?
Is it beef? Or kangaroo skin?
Is it beef? Or is it penguin?
Is it beef? Or wild wombat?
Is it beef? Or rabid bobcat?

 

[Meownaw]

Milk is almost the only thing I religiously follow the expiration date because it's never wrong. Sometimes the milk stinks a day before expiration.



I just dump the whole loaf if I find any mold. It also starts to smell like alcohol after a while and "sweats."



This is absolutely disgusting. On the rare night where I leave taco meat out after passing out, the smell of the dry taco meat is so disgusting... How did you even eat that shit? It literally turns into hard little mouse turds.


I don't fool with meat or chicken. If it looks even slightly off, even if still within expiration, I just throw it out. I want to enjoy the meal.



I used to eat a shitload of eggs, lately I just keep buying cartons and never touching them for weeks. A few months ago I cracked open an egg not knowing it was months old. It looked perfectly fine on the outside, but the inside was completely black and gooey. I was shocked. I had to clean my pan again, and from now on I break my eggs into a measuring cup or something first to ensure it's not a black goo egg.


This is disgusting, I've gone to grab a head of lettuce from my crisper after having not 'checked in on it' in a while and found it completely liquify into brown sludge. Actually looked kinda like the aforementioned black egg yolk.



This puzzles me... Are you talking about a whole ass tuna fish just sitting on your counter? I used to work at a fish market and if you left tuna or salmon out, or didn't turn on the cooler, it would get awful really fast. I'm starting to question your living conditions, but then again I should have done that when you left taco meat out for a full week.



This is fucking me up. There are people who deliberately eat moldy cheese, and you added cheese to the no fly list after saying old taco meat and tuna is fine. I am becoming a doubter of yours.



I have been using the same giant jar of minced garlic for about a year and a half and have detected nothing strange.

What's in that taco meat??? Yeah!
Is it full of little chihuahua feet? Yeah!
Burritos made from rodents in the street? Yeah!
Do they just slap some sauce on it and heat? Yeah! Take it to the bridge!

Oh my god!!! Uh-Huh! Chalupas are such a delicious snack. Uh-Huh!
I like to buy and eat 'um by the sack. Uh-Huh!
But when their meat's alive, does it say "quack?" Uh-Huh! Take it to the chorus!

Is it beef? Or armadillo?
Is it beef? Cajun or black crow?
Is it beef? Or sliced hyena? From Argentina?
Is it beef? Or kangaroo skin?
Is it beef? Or is it penguin?
Is it beef? Or wild wombat?
Is it beef? Or rabid bobcat?

What's in that taco meat??? Yeah!
Is it full of little chihuahua feet? Yeah!
Burritos made from rodents in the street? Yeah!
Do they just slap some sauce on it and heat? Yeah! Take it to the bridge!

Oh my god!!! Uh-Huh! Chalupas are such a delicious snack. Uh-Huh!
I like to buy and eat 'um by the sack. Uh-Huh!
But when their meat's alive, does it say "quack?" Uh-Huh! Take it to the chorus!

Is it beef? Or armadillo?
Is it beef? Cajun or black crow?
Is it beef? Or sliced hyena? From Argentina?
Is it beef? Or kangaroo skin?
Is it beef? Or is it penguin?
Is it beef? Or wild wombat?
Is it beef? Or rabid bobcat?

Fuck you for getting that song stuck in my head again.

 

[BonnieMcFarlaneMe2]

Milk is almost the only thing I religiously follow the expiration date because it's never wrong. Sometimes the milk stinks a day before expiration.



I just dump the whole loaf if I find any mold. It also starts to smell like alcohol after a while and "sweats."



This is absolutely disgusting. On the rare night where I leave taco meat out after passing out, the smell of the dry taco meat is so disgusting... How did you even eat that shit? It literally turns into hard little mouse turds.


I don't fool with meat or chicken. If it looks even slightly off, even if still within expiration, I just throw it out. I want to enjoy the meal.



I used to eat a shitload of eggs, lately I just keep buying cartons and never touching them for weeks. A few months ago I cracked open an egg not knowing it was months old. It looked perfectly fine on the outside, but the inside was completely black and gooey. I was shocked. I had to clean my pan again, and from now on I break my eggs into a measuring cup or something first to ensure it's not a black goo egg.


This is disgusting, I've gone to grab a head of lettuce from my crisper after having not 'checked in on it' in a while and found it completely liquify into brown sludge. Actually looked kinda like the aforementioned black egg yolk.



This puzzles me... Are you talking about a whole ass tuna fish just sitting on your counter? I used to work at a fish market and if you left tuna or salmon out, or didn't turn on the cooler, it would get awful really fast. I'm starting to question your living conditions, but then again I should have done that when you left taco meat out for a full week.



This is fucking me up. There are people who deliberately eat moldy cheese, and you added cheese to the no fly list after saying old taco meat and tuna is fine. I am becoming a doubter of yours.



I have been using the same giant jar of minced garlic for about a year and a half and have detected nothing strange.

What's in that taco meat??? Yeah!
Is it full of little chihuahua feet? Yeah!
Burritos made from rodents in the street? Yeah!
Do they just slap some sauce on it and heat? Yeah! Take it to the bridge!

Oh my god!!! Uh-Huh! Chalupas are such a delicious snack. Uh-Huh!
I like to buy and eat 'um by the sack. Uh-Huh!
But when their meat's alive, does it say "quack?" Uh-Huh! Take it to the chorus!

Is it beef? Or armadillo?
Is it beef? Cajun or black crow?
Is it beef? Or sliced hyena? From Argentina?
Is it beef? Or kangaroo skin?
Is it beef? Or is it penguin?
Is it beef? Or wild wombat?
Is it beef? Or rabid bobcat?

What's in that taco meat??? Yeah!
Is it full of little chihuahua feet? Yeah!
Burritos made from rodents in the street? Yeah!
Do they just slap some sauce on it and heat? Yeah! Take it to the bridge!

Oh my god!!! Uh-Huh! Chalupas are such a delicious snack. Uh-Huh!
I like to buy and eat 'um by the sack. Uh-Huh!
But when their meat's alive, does it say "quack?" Uh-Huh! Take it to the chorus!

Is it beef? Or armadillo?
Is it beef? Cajun or black crow?
Is it beef? Or sliced hyena? From Argentina?
Is it beef? Or kangaroo skin?
Is it beef? Or is it penguin?
Is it beef? Or wild wombat?
Is it beef? Or rabid bobcat?

My ex used to pass out drunk with Taco Bell all the time. Once she ate a three day old burrito from her living room. Surprisingly enough she was skinny because she used to throw up a lot of her food. She was a psycho but sometimes I miss her.

 

[Brooke Shields]

Milk is almost the only thing I religiously follow the expiration date because it's never wrong. Sometimes the milk stinks a day before expiration.

If milk's expiration date is never wrong then why does it still drink pretty good after 1 week let alone 1 day?

I just dump the whole loaf if I find any mold. It also starts to smell like alcohol after a while and "sweats."

I buy $1.29 honey-wheat bread, obviously you're going to get different sweating results if you're buying yours from the 99 cent store

This is absolutely disgusting. On the rare night where I leave taco meat out after passing out, the smell of the dry taco meat is so disgusting... How did you even eat that shit? It literally turns into hard little mouse turds.

You just need to add some more water and let it simmer and mix it, it's fine

I don't fool with meat or chicken. If it looks even slightly off, even if still within expiration, I just throw it out. I want to enjoy the meal.

those ones were jokes, but not really

I used to eat a shitload of eggs, lately I just keep buying cartons and never touching them for weeks. A few months ago I cracked open an egg not knowing it was months old. It looked perfectly fine on the outside, but the inside was completely black and gooey. I was shocked. I had to clean my pan again, and from now on I break my eggs into a measuring cup or something first to ensure it's not a black goo egg.

my egg thing was a joke too
you're provably worse than me now

this is disgusting, I've gone to grab a head of lettuce from my crisper after having not 'checked in on it' in a while and found it completely liquify into brown sludge. Actually looked kinda like the aforementioned black egg yolk.

also a joke, wet soggy lettuce sounds disgusting

This puzzles me... Are you talking about a whole ass tuna fish just sitting on your counter? I used to work at a fish market and if you left tuna or salmon out, or didn't turn on the cooler, it would get awful really fast. I'm starting to question your living conditions, but then again I should have done that when you left taco meat out for a full week.

I meant canned tuna.
also was a joke but I wouldn't be against testing this

This is fucking me up. There are people who deliberately eat moldy cheese, and you added cheese to the no fly list after saying old taco meat and tuna is fine. I am becoming a doubter of yours.

So you're pro moldy cheese but bread is a step too far now? Prude

I have been using the same giant jar of minced garlic for about a year and a half and have detected nothing strange.

Yeah minced shit is different than cloves, they turn to giant minced things that i can't cut finely

 

[Former Prez Gerald Ford]

Expiration date is a Jewish invention to try to starve you out in the coming Race War. Don’t believe the enemy propaganda! Mold is good for you look at penicillin and blue cheese. Blue cheese is fuckin delicious.

 

[DMAN]

If milk's expiration date is never wrong then why does it still drink pretty good after 1 week let alone 1 day?

It doesn't, like I just said mine barely survives the expiration date.

I don't like how you wait for us to reply with total sincerity to tell us it was a joke. There would have been a tip off: I forgot to laugh.