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WWAWD Chinese lunch buffet

Torque’sHeadBump

(Voluntarily) torqued boomer
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68,386
Haven’t had Chinese takeout in forever. Sometimes I’ll get a craving for it but then I just remember what the result will be: putrid gas and liquid shit. If I want it after that I’ll just make some version of chicken stir fry on my own. I don’t give a shit if the sauce / gravy isn’t like the restaurant, my colon and sphincter will thank me.
 

TorpidSloth

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22,088
Me and two friends used to go to one near our school every couple of weeks back in the day and have an eating competition. There were only 2 rules. Your plate had to be piled and you had to finish everything on it for it to count. Most I ever managed was 3.

They also jew you on drinks. Like 4 quid for a coke back in the late 90s. And you'd see them pouring it out of a 2 litre bottle. 2 lumps of ice and a shitty slice of lemon.
 

BonnieMcFarlaneMe2

❤️bonnie simp❤️
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100,399
One of Jim Florentines “Meet The Creeps” hidden camera DVD’s had him, Don Jameson, and I think Club Soda Kenny go to one of these buffets and they pulled up there chairs to it and brought their own buckets to take food. I know some people here don’t like Club Soda Kenny but that giant dolt could really make people uncomfortable for laughs.
There was a super fat guy too that I didn’t recognize. “You’re so rude!” That’s up there with taking fishing poles into the Chinese market. Extremely underrated dvds.
 

Chive Turkey

Erock Army Desserter
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42,413
But everyone on the planet wants to be American, not "English". We won and now England is a white minority. Sucks to be you.
download (1).txt.jpg
 

IGotATreeOnMyHouse85

Stand Alone Fruit
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261,523
There was a super fat guy too that I didn’t recognize. “You’re so rude!” That’s up there with taking fishing poles into the Chinese market. Extremely underrated dvds.
There was some good stuff on those - Artie Lange buying gay porn magazines, offering hand lotion outside of the peep booths, Kenny explaining why he needs his gerbil dry cleaned (it’s poop!) the porta potty men’s room attendant, etc. even the “scripted” one they did called cock blocker was good. I think Jim did the drinking in a car on a test drive before Borat did the drinking in a car with an instructor.

Jim said they were made for a pilot for VH1 for a possible hidden camera show (since Jackass was big for MTV) but they said the humor was “too mean”
 

BonnieMcFarlaneMe2

❤️bonnie simp❤️
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100,399
There was some good stuff on those - Artie Lange buying gay porn magazines, offering hand lotion outside of the peep booths, Kenny explaining why he needs his gerbil dry cleaned (it’s poop!) the porta potty men’s room attendant, etc. even the “scripted” one they did called cock blocker was good. I think Jim did the drinking in a car on a test drive before Borat did the drinking in a car with an instructor.

Jim said they were made for a pilot for VH1 for a possible hidden camera show (since Jackass was big for MTV) but they said the humor was “too mean”
I have all these dvd’s. Probably the only person on the planet with Don Jameison’s autograph.
 

BonnieMcFarlaneMe2

❤️bonnie simp❤️
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100,399
I served him once when I was a bartender years ago. I recognized him so he gave me a good tip.
Him and Florentine always came off like good guys. The telemarketers cd’s are one of the few things I can consistently laugh at every 6 months when I listen again. “I cant busines with someone who just sold my pizza.” “Yeah, answer that.”
 

IGotATreeOnMyHouse85

Stand Alone Fruit
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261,523
Him and Florentine always came off like good guys. The telemarketers cd’s are one of the few things I can consistently laugh at every 6 months when I listen again. “I cant busines with someone who just sold my pizza.” “Yeah, answer that.”
Florentine is one of the few that hasn’t been shitting on stern for how he’s changed since he says a big part of his success was Stern putting him on after Jackie left. Crank Yankers was all known people except him at the time and he said he got that thanks to Stern. I don’t know what he was thinking dating Robin but he won’t say anything bad about Stern. I think the only other one to not shit on Stern was Gilbert even after he stopped having him on. Someone would ask Gilbert about it and why he’s not on and he would say “oh, who knows?”
 

BonnieMcFarlaneMe2

❤️bonnie simp❤️
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100,399
Florentine is one of the few that hasn’t been shitting on stern for how he’s changed since he says a big part of his success was Stern putting him on after Jackie left. Crank Yankers was all known people except him at the time and he said he got that thanks to Stern. I don’t know what he was thinking dating Robin but he won’t say anything bad about Stern. I think the only other one to not shit on Stern was Gilbert even after he stopped having him on. Someone would ask Gilbert about it and why he’s not on and he would say “oh, who knows?”
Spitting in the cupcakes didn’t help but he was invited on after that. I think it was the, “oh we have one of those in the White House” joke that really cemented it. On Artie’s podcast there’s a hilarious riff about how Stern doesn’t have comics on anymore. Until recently I didn’t realize that Crank Yankers was an Adam Carolla thing. I used to watch that shit all the time in middle school.
 

IGotATreeOnMyHouse85

Stand Alone Fruit
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261,523
Spitting in the cupcakes didn’t help but he was invited on after that. I think it was the, “oh we have one of those in the White House” joke that really cemented it. On Artie’s podcast there’s a hilarious riff about how Stern doesn’t have comics on anymore. Until recently I didn’t realize that Crank Yankers was an Adam Carolla thing. I used to watch that shit all the time in middle school.
I just found out recently from someone posting old photos from sterns big 60th birthday they did about 10 years ago Gilbert was there so he still got invited to things even though they wouldn’t put him on the show.
 
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