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I hope a stage light gets loose and drops on his head.
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Wwaw "the machine"
- Thread starter medium wyzzz
- Start date
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The movie will be god fucking awful but will be a financial hit and propel Bert into Hollywood past Rogan and other comedians. Instead of being the most famous comedian he’ll be the least famous person in Hollywood. “The Machine” is literally Berts biggest story and the sole reason he’s famous. Turn that into a shitty movie with a big budget and throw a couple B list actors in there and you have a fucking hit.
It literally infuriates me to think about. This fat fucking retard doesn’t have a single redeemable thing about him. He’s a fat mess. Alcoholic. Hates his family. Extremely vain. Talks about “the craft” of comedy. Not a single funny joke. Parades his disgusting gut around because the only way people will laugh is if it’s at him. His entire fucking act has been based on complete lies from his Van Wilder party days to his Joe Rogan come up after The Machine. I can only hope to god if this fucking slob blows up 100 rape accusations from his partying days come with it.
It literally infuriates me to think about. This fat fucking retard doesn’t have a single redeemable thing about him. He’s a fat mess. Alcoholic. Hates his family. Extremely vain. Talks about “the craft” of comedy. Not a single funny joke. Parades his disgusting gut around because the only way people will laugh is if it’s at him. His entire fucking act has been based on complete lies from his Van Wilder party days to his Joe Rogan come up after The Machine. I can only hope to god if this fucking slob blows up 100 rape accusations from his partying days come with it.
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Bert has been motherfucked by virtually everybody in the comedy scene.
Jay Mohr slapped Berts fat face in public. Twice.
Ari Shaffir spiked his drink unknowingly to fuck with him.
Opie and Anthony told him to fuck off after his first and only appearance.
Bill Burr cancelled their podcast and friendship because he realized what an unfunny faggot he was.
Bert lied about smoking PCP with Tracy Morgan and watching him fight 9 dudes to which Tracy said “I’ve met you once.”
Even Rogan motherfucks him every year with the Sober October shit. The little HGH midget challenges his fat misshapen friends into a fitness competition for the sole purpose of winning and having his fans go “wow, look at these obese slobs trying to do pushups.”
Louis CK motherfucked him after witnessing his comedy act. They later did a podcast episode which is unbearable to watch.
Bert also claims he lived with Patrice which, to this fucking day, despite listening to hours of Patrice and O&A content, have NEVER heard Patrice mention “oh yeah, i’m living with this tubby fuckin alcoholic mess.”
Jay Mohr slapped Berts fat face in public. Twice.
Ari Shaffir spiked his drink unknowingly to fuck with him.
Opie and Anthony told him to fuck off after his first and only appearance.
Bill Burr cancelled their podcast and friendship because he realized what an unfunny faggot he was.
Bert lied about smoking PCP with Tracy Morgan and watching him fight 9 dudes to which Tracy said “I’ve met you once.”
Even Rogan motherfucks him every year with the Sober October shit. The little HGH midget challenges his fat misshapen friends into a fitness competition for the sole purpose of winning and having his fans go “wow, look at these obese slobs trying to do pushups.”
Louis CK motherfucked him after witnessing his comedy act. They later did a podcast episode which is unbearable to watch.
Bert also claims he lived with Patrice which, to this fucking day, despite listening to hours of Patrice and O&A content, have NEVER heard Patrice mention “oh yeah, i’m living with this tubby fuckin alcoholic mess.”