Where we at with situations that almost got out of control in your life?

[aRTie02150]

I remember when I was about 10 I was riding my bike down a very steep hill in the city. I lost control and flew off the bike at probably close to 30 mph. I remember getting fucked up bad and was far from home. This Central American dude saw the whole thing gave me a ride home and threw my bike in the back. When we got into my neighborhood he decided to park a block away and walk with me to my house. Well someone must have thought this man was the one who hurt me and a couple dudes came running at him to see what happened. Dude could barely speak English and right away got pushed up against a wall. I just stood there still half unconscious as they were hassling the poor wettie. Eventually my dad came running out like a madman about to attack the guy. Thankfully my dad speaks Spanish and was able to listen to the man before getting decked.

I'm assuming that guy never did a nice thing again.

 

[guest]

I rear ended some guy in my car when I was blacked out drunk. I somehow convinced him to not call the police. Woke up the next morning with a fucked up car and the guy's phone number. Really coulda ruined my life there.

 

[captain_kamala]

i got robbed by gypsies at a starbucks in madrid spain! i had my purse hanging on the hook under the table. well i had all my money and stuff on me so they just got the purse itself but it was a louis vuitton

 

[FranksWirecutters]

I almost had a fake reporter interview me about a lawsuit. Would have had to kill myself if I did something that stupid.

 

[Stent]

I used to drive like a stupid asshole. I was passing a line of cars at about 110mph when an old guy ahead of me decided to do a u-turn. It was two lanes on my side and a single lane on the other, so I'm flying down the middle lane when the old guy pulls into the middle lane and just stops because the old fuck wants to turn around in traffic where it's actually illegal to do so. No ABS brakes or any of that shit so I have to be careful not to lock up the brakes and slide. I'm going to hit him no matter how much I slow down. I throw on the indicator and pull into the lane full of cars without even having time to look. Thankfully I don't hit anyone or cause an accident. I go around him and then pull into the middle lane again before I've scrubbed enough speed to be at the same as the traffic. In the rear-view I can see the old guy sitting in the middle of the lane at a complete stop with his indicator on to turn around not realizing how close we all came to burning to death. I'm not waiting around for someone to call the cops on me so I speed out of there. At the time I thought the old guy was an irresponsible fuckwit.

(This is all very much a fictional story for entertainment purposes only and not an admission of guilt or that it even happened)

 

[guest]

I remember when I was about 10 I was riding my bike down a very steep hill in the city. I lost control and flew off the bike at probably close to 30 mph. I remember getting fucked up bad and was far from home. This Central American dude saw the whole thing gave me a ride home and threw my bike in the back. When we got into my neighborhood he decided to park a block away and walk with me to my house. Well someone must have thought this man was the one who hurt me and a couple dudes came running at him to see what happened. Dude could barely speak English and right away got pushed up against a wall. I just stood there still half unconscious as they were hassling the poor wettie. Eventually my dad came running out like a madman about to attack the guy. Thankfully my dad speaks Spanish and was able to listen to the man before getting decked.

I'm assuming that guy never did a nice thing again.

Nor should he have, you miscreant.

 

[Ed Patterson]

i got robbed by gypsies at a starbucks in madrid spain! i had my purse hanging on the hook under the table. well i had all my money and stuff on me so they just got the purse itself but it was a louis vuitton

My rape had no effect on your life.

sniff

 

[captain_kamala]

My rape had no effect on your life.

sniff

yeah not really
thanks for not killing me

 

[LockedHDD__Pot]

yeah not really
thanks for not killing me

I like ur attitude, it would work well in my libertarian utopia.

 

[fenrir]

One night, when I was in college, I was driving home from a party, as fucked up and stoned as I've ever been. I started to make a left turn at an intersection but my depth of perception must have been off because I mistook the concrete island for the curb on the opposite side of the road and turned into the oncoming lane. It was 3 AM so thankfully there were no cars on the road; that is until I see a pair of headlights coming straight for me.

Nonplussed, I thought, "That guy's fucked up", as I kept speeding towards him. He starts honking at me and flashing his lights, but I'm slow to panic as he gets closer and closer. Finally, as his headlights start to fill my windshield, he swerves away, screaming at me.

"Wow, what an asshole," I thought. It was probably another mile before I realized that I was on the wrong side of the road.

I won a game of chicken and didn't even know it.

 

[satanssockpuppet]

A long time ago I was doing a shitload of coke. At around noon I drove my work van over to my dealer's place, bought his last gram and gave him some cash to get me more when he reloaded later that day. So after work, maybe 5:30 or so, I called him to see if he'd reloaded. He said yeah and I said I'd be right over, but he said wait an hour, as he'd just gotten home. So an hour later I drive over and there are all these people milling around in the street. I drive by his house and I see that the door had been kicked. In that hour span the cops raided him, trashed his place and dragged him away. I hightailed it the fuck out of there and stopped with the coke shortly thereafter.

 

[RedGlareRecipient]

I stuck my dick in crazy and then married it. Kinda. It’s actually one of those “Maybe there is a God” moments when the officiant put the wrong date on the licensing thing so it didn’t actually count as legal, but goddamn was it close.

 

[Uncle Floyd]

Nonplussed, I thought, "That guy's fucked up"

 

[LockedHDD__Pot]

 

[TheUserRedditBanned]

One night, when I was in college, I was driving home from a party, as fucked up and stoned as I've ever been. I started to make a left turn at an intersection but my depth of perception must have been off because I mistook the concrete island for the curb on the opposite side of the road and turned into the oncoming lane. It was 3 AM so thankfully there were no cars on the road; that is until I see a pair of headlights coming straight for me.

Nonplussed, I thought, "That guy's fucked up", as I kept speeding towards him. He starts honking at me and flashing his lights, but I'm slow to panic as he gets closer and closer. Finally, as his headlights start to fill my windshield, he swerves away, screaming at me.

"Wow, what an asshole," I thought. It was probably another mile before I realized that I was on the wrong side of the road.

I won a game of chicken and didn't even know it.

Reminds me of that Westchester mom killed herself and some family and 3 strangers driving drunk the wrong way down the Taconic:

Wrong-Way Taconic Driver Smoked Pot, Drank Vodka: Cops

A Long Island mother was drunk and high on marijuana when she collided with an SUV, killing herself and seven others.

www.nbcnewyork.com

As I recall, her family spent a ton of time and money trying to "clear her name," when the truth was pretty undeniable.

 

[Joe_Cumia_Eats_HUMAN_SHIT]

Reminds me of that Westchester mom killed herself and some family and 3 strangers driving drunk the wrong way down the Taconic:

Wrong-Way Taconic Driver Smoked Pot, Drank Vodka: Cops

A Long Island mother was drunk and high on marijuana when she collided with an SUV, killing herself and seven others.

www.nbcnewyork.com

As I recall, her family spent a ton of time and money trying to "clear her name," when the truth was pretty undeniable.

Lol I don't remember that being in the documentary. They tried to say she had some sort of brain aneurysm

 

[DiarrheaDick]

Reminds me of that Westchester mom killed herself and some family and 3 strangers driving drunk the wrong way down the Taconic:

Wrong-Way Taconic Driver Smoked Pot, Drank Vodka: Cops

A Long Island mother was drunk and high on marijuana when she collided with an SUV, killing herself and seven others.

www.nbcnewyork.com

As I recall, her family spent a ton of time and money trying to "clear her name," when the truth was pretty undeniable.

It was mostly her husband. He's either a complete asshole or a clueless idiot for sticking his neck out so far for her. There was a broken bottle of vodka in the front seat and she had undigested vodka in her stomach among all the other evidence that she was intoxicated.

 

[Malibu Pat]

My father was legitimate crazy. In and out of nut houses. When I was 12, I got my first period. I went to go tell my mom, and my looney father over heard. He was also a convicted felon, so he wasn’t allowed to have a gun. Well somehow get got one and tried to shoot me in the pussy. He thought the period blood was some dude named Frank from the nuthouse trying to take him back

 

[fenrir]

 

[potatopeeler63]

i was in some shithole mexican town. the hooker asked if i wanted to give her a baby. i said yea, no condom sex, duh
we raw dogged 3x in the next week amazing. 3 weeks later ( had left) she was blowing up my number that she was pregnant.
it was on my mexican sim. crushed that bitch and never heard from her again
i have some aztec warrior running around mexico city probably.

patrick and i are similiar in that sense. but i have a job and in shape so im better than him.