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Peoples court video

JoeCumiawearsDIAPERS

DMANIAC
Forum Clout
50,462
Seriously. I've never seen a better physical embodiment of the words "buffoon" or "dolt."

He's not retarded. He almost looks like a regular guy but you just look at him and hear "duh-huh-huh". You know that if he ever had to vacuum his floors he would end up Chevy Chase-ishly wrapping the cord around himself, his pants would fall down and he'd tumble down the stairs.

Layla would walk by and see her stupid father unconscious face down on the floor again with his bare ass exposed. It used to upset her and make her cry but she's used to it now. Just yesterday he licked a pole outside and got his tongue stuck for 3 hours before she found him. His pants had fallen down 20 minutes into the ordeal.

She just steps over him, walks upstairs, sits on her bed and stares blankly at the wall until it's time for mashed plantains and then she can go to bed.Hopefully she can dream that she lives somewhere else and has a different family. A family that doesn't embarrass her. A family that buys her skin care products and gets her to school on time so she doesn't have to be singled out by her teacher for being late, resulting in all the cute boys looking at her and noticing her horrible, pocked up face and laughing at her behind her back.

She wakes up at 10am the next day, a school day, to the smell of burning plantains. She hears her father's stupid voice call "Layla, you're late! Hurry up and eat your breakfast! No bacon, egg and cheese on a roll! I made your favorite! Plantains!" Layla rolls out of bed in the same clothes she wore yesterday and walks downstairs, staring blankly. Layla hates plantains. Layla hates her father. Layla hates her life.

Layla goes to school late in her dirty clothes. Dad doesn't do laundry. He says he can't because Joe Brandon is fucking him on his hydro and water bills and the USA is in distress. Layla hates her father. Layla hates America. Layla hates her life.

I truly believe Joe Cumia will die by slipping on a banana peel and falling off the side of a mountain.
 

bumbum8

It died on the vine
Forum Clout
4,505
Seriously. I've never seen a better physical embodiment of the words "buffoon" or "dolt."

He's not retarded. He almost looks like a regular guy but you just look at him and hear "duh-huh-huh". You know that if he ever had to vacuum his floors he would end up Chevy Chase-ishly wrapping the cord around himself, his pants would fall down and he'd tumble down the stairs.

Layla would walk by and see her stupid father unconscious face down on the floor again with his bare ass exposed. It used to upset her and make her cry but she's used to it now. Just yesterday he licked a pole outside and got his tongue stuck for 3 hours before she found him. His pants had fallen down 20 minutes into the ordeal.

She just steps over him, walks upstairs, sits on her bed and stares blankly at the wall until it's time for mashed plantains and then she can go to bed.Hopefully she can dream that she lives somewhere else and has a different family. A family that doesn't embarrass her. A family that buys her skin care products and gets her to school on time so she doesn't have to be singled out by her teacher for being late, resulting in all the cute boys looking at her and noticing her horrible, pocked up face and laughing at her behind her back.

She wakes up at 10am the next day, a school day, to the smell of burning plantains. She hears her father's stupid voice call "Layla, you're late! Hurry up and eat your breakfast! No bacon, egg and cheese on a roll! I made your favorite! Plantains!" Layla rolls out of bed in the same clothes she wore yesterday and walks downstairs, staring blankly. Layla hates plantains. Layla hates her father. Layla hates her life.

Layla goes to school late in her dirty clothes. Dad doesn't do laundry. He says he can't because Joe Brandon is fucking him on his hydro and water bills and the USA is in distress. Layla hates her father. Layla hates America. Layla hates her life.
I'm now sure part of the reason Layla's skin is so fucked up is because her dad is feeding her slop fried in "healthy" seed oils and isn't doing any laundry so she has to sit in hers, Carol's, and Joe's dead skin cells all over her face.

Poor girl probably has bacne like a motherfucker too.
 
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17,182
Someone tell me if I'm wrong but iirc this was another Blue Oyster Cult situation where before we got a hold of it he swore he came off looking good and really made the club owner look like an asshole, and seemingly forgot the dressing down Judge Juggs gave him before ruling for him on a technicality, no?

I would have sworn he didn't have shit to say about her until after he realized we have the video.
 

stillreal2medammit

Fuck you Steve
Forum Clout
430
Seriously. I've never seen a better physical embodiment of the words "buffoon" or "dolt."

He's not retarded. He almost looks like a regular guy but you just look at him and hear "duh-huh-huh". You know that if he ever had to vacuum his floors he would end up Chevy Chase-ishly wrapping the cord around himself, his pants would fall down and he'd tumble down the stairs.

Layla would walk by and see her stupid father unconscious face down on the floor again with his bare ass exposed. It used to upset her and make her cry but she's used to it now. Just yesterday he licked a pole outside and got his tongue stuck for 3 hours before she found him. His pants had fallen down 20 minutes into the ordeal.

She just steps over him, walks upstairs, sits on her bed and stares blankly at the wall until it's time for mashed plantains and then she can go to bed.Hopefully she can dream that she lives somewhere else and has a different family. A family that doesn't embarrass her. A family that buys her skin care products and gets her to school on time so she doesn't have to be singled out by her teacher for being late, resulting in all the cute boys looking at her and noticing her horrible, pocked up face and laughing at her behind her back.

She wakes up at 10am the next day, a school day, to the smell of burning plantains. She hears her father's stupid voice call "Layla, you're late! Hurry up and eat your breakfast! No bacon, egg and cheese on a roll! I made your favorite! Plantains!" Layla rolls out of bed in the same clothes she wore yesterday and walks downstairs, staring blankly. Layla hates plantains. Layla hates her father. Layla hates her life.

Layla goes to school late in her dirty clothes. Dad doesn't do laundry. He says he can't because Joe Brandon is fucking him on his hydro and water bills and the USA is in distress. Layla hates her father. Layla hates America. Layla hates her life.

Everything you wrote here was more original than anything artistic or creative that fucking dildo joe could and has ever created.
 

TheGhostOfAbeVigoda

The Backbone of America
Forum Clout
117,309
Someone tell me if I'm wrong but iirc this was another Blue Oyster Cult situation where before we got a hold of it he swore he came off looking good and really made the club owner look like an asshole, and seemingly forgot the dressing down Judge Juggs gave him before ruling for him on a technicality, no?

I would have sworn he didn't have shit to say about her until after he realized we have the video.
I remember there was a clip of him calling in to Anthony's show right after it. He did think he came across looking good, but he also knew the judge thought he was a scumbag and gave him shit. He referred to her as Judge Mulignan, which got a ho-lee shit out of lil bro.
 
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5,690
Someone tell me if I'm wrong but iirc this was another Blue Oyster Cult situation where before we got a hold of it he swore he came off looking good and really made the club owner look like an asshole, and seemingly forgot the dressing down Judge Juggs gave him before ruling for him on a technicality, no?

I would have sworn he didn't have shit to say about her until after he realized we have the video.
Yeah I remember him posting on Facebook weeks before the taping about how he was going on tv to teach this libtard a lesson. Posted pictures of himself and the crypt keeper on their way to the taping, and then took a victory lap for being a legal genius who can be a racist, that can enter in to contracts, and win a settlement and get the girl.

It was only after the airing, Reddit abuse, Bennington beat down, that he posted pictures of the libtard Judge’s MILFy beefers on Facebook trying to disparage her.
 

upanddown

Forum Clout
2,824
This needs to be somehow immortalized in the annals of television history.

Everything about this is utterly hilarious.

My ribs, man.
 

Hudson Margera-Hughes

Heyyyy, HELLHOLE ADLsters...
Forum Clout
4,503
Someone tell me if I'm wrong but iirc this was another Blue Oyster Cult situation where before we got a hold of it he swore he came off looking good and really made the club owner look like an asshole, and seemingly forgot the dressing down Judge Juggs gave him before ruling for him on a technicality, no?

I would have sworn he didn't have shit to say about her until after he realized we have the video.
Judge Beach Juggs rules!
 

Hudson Margera-Hughes

Heyyyy, HELLHOLE ADLsters...
Forum Clout
4,503
UUUUUU2 cover band. 😝
I think what pissed him off more than anything else was Judge Juggs mocking him with "I hope you're not wannabe Bono? Because you don't look anything like him... Moooo" "[Shitty nervous laughter] No, no... I cosplay as the Edge. I'm the stupid nigger faggot that pouts in the corner. It's not my party, I can cry if I want to."
"Card carrying, I see."

That was the equivalent of cow-tipping to the Bovine.
 
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