Pat's review of the dumb Matrix movie

[AwfulManTitTankTop]

Many Saints of Newark really made me realize how it must've felt to see Matrix Reloaded or Phantom Menace on opening night. A followup to something you love so much that you can't even cynically not be excited about it on some level. Then you see it and it fuckin sucks. And they don't leave it alone. They do more and more and more.

David Chase did that awful podcast with Steve Schirrippa and Michael Imperioli and he admitted Ralph killed the horse. The way Hollywood is treating this man, forcing him to do these awful interviews where he addresses every ambiguity in the entire series makes me depressed and ashamed. The ambiguity was part of what made that fucking show so great in the first place. Whoever Did This is my favorite episode in the whole series because so much is accomplished in just one episode. From a writing perspective it's incredible. These faggot audiences want everything spoon fed and explained to them. Fucking nauseating.

 

[Stent]

These faggot audiences want everything spoon fed and explained to them.

But I need to know what every button on Darth Vader's suit does.

 

[AntsBatteryCharge]

So in this time of covid, with omicron spreading like wildfire fat pat chose to go sit with a crowd in a movie theater? Literally shaking rn. He is Literally killing people.

It's on HBO Max right now, but you may still be right.

 

[MonsterSteve]

Of course you did, you tasteless rube. It's pure fucking garbage in every sense but of course this mongoloid enjoys anything that has things/characters that he recognizes in it.



Yeah, that's not why people are disliking, you idiot. You really think people are bashing it because they're so sensitive about the "clever" digs at the audience of the original movies? It's turning off a lot of people because it's absolute shite. The story is sub-fan fiction level, the acting is appalling from most of the cast and even the action scenes are terrible.

I knew this idiot would just gobble it up and try to pretend he's above it all and can appreciate the deeper themes of the movie (it has none).

I fucking hate him.

Even left wing idiots say the movie is quite shitty. He seems to come from the Kevin Smith movie review club, where there are no bad movies, only less good ones. Fucking fat idiots, both of them.

 

[DanMullen'sRetardedNephew]

There's been an update

My only response to it is that he's fat.

 

[Stent]

I always read his tough guy lines in his whiny high-pitched voice since the Josiah tapes.

Yessss, child. IT is Too bad. Lana has earned the righT To Tell you To shuT your fucking mouuuff!

 

[RoTheHo69]

There's been an update

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My only response to it is that he's fat.

Resurections? fucking idiot. What an ass.

 

[Will Tate]

There's been an update

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My only response to it is that he's fat.

If he put half as much effort into developing his craft as a writer as he does into simping for trannies on Twitter he'd have 3 Pulitzers by now.

 

[Meownaw]

There's been an update

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My only response to it is that he's fat.

I actually got chills from that. How embarrassing

 

[AwfulManTitTankTop]

There's been an update

View attachment 16915

My only response to it is that he's fat.

Have either Wachowski ever admitted it's a trans allegory? They didn't even go Troon until years after the original came out. I always heard Neo was Jesus but I'm sure that's alt right propaganda, child.

Rick, nobody who is "red pilled" in the current sense of the word is going to even watch this nostalgia grab horseshit. They know better. Art is subjective and open to interpretation. Just because you think it's about trannies doesn't mean you're right and that anyone who interpreted it differently is wrong. And just because a group of very funny right leaning people hijacked a term from the movie doesn't give the Wachowskis a free pass to make a shit movie with no subtlety whatsoever. Doing so assumes the audience is retarded and can't draw their own conclusions by themselves. You're insulting them. You're telling them they're too stupid to form their opinions on your work and you know how they need to feel. It's the mark of a hack. And its never ok.

 

[Slackjawed Cow]

Im sure pat is going to simp heavily over the blue haired one.

 

[HotDogJoe]

I just fucking knew he'd take this angle. He's so goddam predictable.

So because "Lana" has "earned the right" to never be subtle again, that means "she" has earned the right to make a terrible movie, does it?

Put all the crazy identity politics aside for a second - the movie is just objectively shit. The story is completely non-sensical (as were those of the original two sequels), the aesthetic is absolute garbage, all the supporting cast are terrible and forgettable and even the action/fight scenes are shit. Nothing about it is good, yet you've got retards like pig defending it because they can't separate the fact that it was made by a tranny who was talking back the meaning of the red pill (faaawk yeah!!!).

I fucking hate this cunt.

 

[guest]

I tried to watch the new Matrix movie last night. I got about 30-40 minutes in before I gave up. The "special effects" are trash, the plot makes no sense, and it's clear this movie is just generally bad. I liked the original Matrix but this and the sequels are sooooo awful.

 

[HotDogJoe]

the plot makes no sense

What you didn't think the original 3 Matrix movies actually being something that Thomas Anderson actually designed as a game series but actually also did happen but he had no memory of them happening in reality, just enough to make a whole game series detailing every part of them is a good, solid and believable plot?

*dolphin shriek*

 

[Meownaw]

I just fucking knew he'd take this angle. He's so goddam predictable.

So because "Lana" has "earned the right" to never be subtle again, that means "she" has earned the right to make a terrible movie, does it?

Put all the crazy identity politics aside for a second - the movie is just objectively shit. The story is completely non-sensical (as were those of the original two sequels), the aesthetic is absolute garbage, all the supporting cast are terrible and forgettable and even the action/fight scenes are shit. Nothing about it is good, yet you've got retards like pig defending it because they can't separate the fact that it was made by a tranny who was talking back the meaning of the red pill (faaawk yeah!!!).

I fucking hate this cunt.

The argument these people are making doesn't even work because how do these people justify the shit they pumped out after the first Matrix? Are you telling me they were making shit movies ironically for this many years just for the chance to reveal the master plan on Marix 4? Get the fuck out of here.

 

[JumboYumYums]

Does anyone seriously believe the first Matrix was an allegory for becoming a tranny? It looks like everyone's retconned it to be that way but prior to the Wachowski's trooning out there was no mention of it.

 

[O-BLOCK NIGGA!]

Trannies create the concept of The Red Pill, then cry when it's not used the way they wanted it to be, because its concept cuts a little too close to home now, so they (((shut it down))). Also; here's Keanu Reeves. And Patrick is fat.

The End.