Let's get Patrick a job!

[guest]

 

[bovinebrain]

A lot of people are saying Nigel Igger is looking for a job as well. That’s just what I’ve heard.

 

[Gay Faggot.]

He already knows the menu. For “Date you can start?” you should put, tonight when I come in.

 

[Kim_Jong_Poon_]

Customer: I think you got my order wrong, sir. I ordered a margarita and this is a rum and coke.

: No chiilllld. You've never ordered a margarita a day in your life because you're not allllllllowed to order a margarita. I'm sorry you're so stupid, hush now.

 

[NoBacon]

A lot of people are saying Nigel Igger is looking for a job as well. That’s just what I’ve heard.

If by “a job” you mean “someone’s bike” then yeah Nige is all over it

 

[TheRevAlJolson]

Kind of a funny bit: apply for a bunch of retail jobs in his area so keeps getting calls from Walmart, target, Kohls etc

 

[Mr-Wrinkle-Paws]

They will throw it in the trash once they see the name, they know what a fucking bum he is

 

[Meownaw]

Imagine if someone from here got the job and Pat would be left wondering if the new guy at hooligans is one of his cyber stalkers.

 

[Udders]

Imagine if someone from here got the job and Pat would be left wondering if the new guy at hooligans is one of his cyber stalkers.

Thats an incredible bit, especially since we're all in Milwaukee.

 

[fusciasomething]

Even if I were looking for a simping limp dick loser I wouldn't hire Pat. I'm in construction and the mexican dudes who work for me would cave his fat skull in and it would create a headache for me. In the real world Rick would get murdered by the "allies" he always talks about, they don't need or want the advice of a useless fat fuck.

 

[Easily_Remembered]

We should get him a job at Papa John's, since Papa John is a staunch Republica- er, I mean an alt-Right Nazi incel cyberstalker.

Pat could never work in a service industry. Not only is he a fat effeminate pussy who's afraid of manual labor, but he would also refuse service to anyone who he perceived to be a Conservative.

 

[FranksWirecutters]

I'm ok with him being the worthless eater he is. When the cull the herd he'll be on the chopping block.

 

[wbgreen]

Service industry is a non-starter. 8 hours standing up is too much to ask of Fatrick's ankles.

 

[Snake]

A lot of people are saying Nigel Igger is looking for a job as well. That’s just what I’ve heard.

I highly recommend the baby child back ribs, child.

 

[Stent]

Gotta start at the beginning. First a CV.

Personal statement: I am the best at everything.
Education: None
Skills: being ignored by own 46k Twitter following, taking selfies of face, correcting the record online
Experience: None
Last job: None
Hobbies: Pop culture pedophilia
Date available: 2 weeks notice (4 if clipping toe nails causes injury)
References: I was at a black gay wedding anniversary

 

[Dummy Gaynuts]

Kind of a funny bit: apply for a bunch of retail jobs in his area so keeps getting calls from Walmart, target, Kohls etc

bold to assume anyone would reach out to him for an interview

 

[RobertMewler]

If someone whipped up a resume using his real work history and sent it to local recruiters the bit would fail because no one's looking for a useless, lazy sack of shit. Too bad too because otherwise it'd have potential.

 

[guest]

I worked in a couple of pubs as a student. Fun times. Hard work on your feet for 12 hour shifts but got laid a bunch and had some good times. One thing's for sure. The staff in any pub kind of universally look down on the hardcore regulars. Even if they're cool (which Fat is not), even if they tip well (which Fat does not), they're still, at the end of the day, loser drunks who don't have anything better to do.

Fat is laughed at by the people who "serve" him and he wouldn't last half of one shift without quitting or having a heart attack.

 

[NoBacon]

bold to assume anyone would reach out to him for an interview

Still be funny to be cunty to them in applications, like it’s beneath him and research for another best selling novel

 

[James Heffner]

A lot of people are saying Nigel Igger is looking for a job as well. That’s just what I’ve heard.

i heard josiah munoz lost his job at huff post.. he may also be interested in this opportunity