Jenna Ortegathread

[guest]

Happy Wednesday and Merry Christmas, Jencels! I'll get to episode 5 next week when I have more time.

I'd like to wish Patrick S Tomlinson a Merry First Viewing of Wednesday, and a Happy New Year!

Short but sweet. Just like Jenna

 

[RapistWithHIV]

How do you fellas make ogling women so gay.

 

[guest]

Jencels

Suck it, Mullen.

 

[guest]

How do you fellas make ogling women so gay.

There’s an art to it.

 

[Queefer Sutherland]

 

[Jenna]

Happy Wednesday onaforums!

After Christmas break, we're back to Wednesday S01E05. Nothing can really live up to the dance (until season 2!) but there's still plenty of murder and mystery to round out the back half of the first season. In this one, we finally get to spend some time with her parents, Gomez and Morticia!

HELL YEAH!
THEY WILL NOT REPLACE US!
THIS PROPERLY REPRESENTS THE DIVERSITY OF 1960S TELEVISION!

Nah fuck that, you get the oft-discussed Catherine Zeta-Jones and Luis Guzman. Even then most are okay with Catherine because her pussy causes throat cancer and this one scene from the 90s:

As this episode shows, the Wednesday/Gomez relationship is your standard "Daddy's little Demon" while Wednesday & Morticia are far more complicated. We start with a bit from Nevermore's past, seen from the POV of Headmistress Weems when she was just a student. Walking through the quad after a Rave'N back in the day, she sees a young man plummet to his death. Looking up, all she can see is... Gomez Addams holding a sword! But Gomez gets away with the crime, because white lives don't matter.

But first let's get to the other kids. Wednesday's roommate Enid hasn't "wolfed out" yet, so there's a weird plotline where her mother wants to send her to werewolf conversion camp but it's treated like gay conversion camp. Enid decides not to go and her dad was proud of her. Some furry on tiktok called these scenes "rlly unserious" and I have to agree.

Bianca meanwhile has stopped being evil since last episode and her face turn means meeting her evil mother. Her evil mother's looks... I mean siren sound is failing so she needs to recruit Bianca and her supple young siren sound to continue evil siren business. If not she'll expose Bianca's big secret... that she used her powers to trick everyone and get into Nevermore! Again I don't know if this is supposed to be an affirmative action thing.

Eugene is in the hospital after last week's attack (and has two moms because Netflix) and Xavier's daddy is too cool to show up. Okay back to Wednesday:

So the Addams Family meets with Weems and it's clear Weems still harbors a grudge while Morticia is past it. They all agree to go to family therapy, which turns into Wednesday demanding answers as to the accused murder. Gomez claims the townie, Garrett Gates was psychotic and attacked him, and Gomez only acted in self-defense. Meanwhile the sheriff finds a suicide note from the coroner saying they faked the case to protect Gomez and killed themselves out of guilt. Gomez gets arrested.

Finally Morticia tells Wednesday the truth: she too was involved in a love triangle between a townie and Nevermore student. Garrett came to Nevermore to kill Gomez, Morticia stabbed him, and Gomez took the blame because chivalry. They dig up Garrett's body and find ample evidence that he didn't die of a stab wound, he died from nightshade poisoning. A convenient flashback shows Garrett, on instructions from his father, meant to kill all the Nevermore students but got intercepted by Gomez. The poison exploded in his pocket, absorbing into his skin, turning him insane, and eventually killing him. With this new informantion, Gomez is released from prison and makes out with his wife.

There's also a tender mother/daughter moment where Morticia says she has powers like Wednesday. Morticia is a Dove, meaning she lives positively and thus gets positive visions. Wednesday however is a Raven, she lives negativity and gets negative visions. Morticia says someone from her past will help her unlock her powers, and Wednesday goes oh shit I've been seeing this pilgrim chick that looks like me. Then because the episode needs a minor cliffhanger, someone writes "FIRE WILL RAIN" on the Nevermore lawn in... you guessed it... fire.

Next week, it's Wednesday's birthday! She goes on her first date and everyone becomes more suspicious as she looks into Garrett Gates' family.

 

[guest]

You’re a funny fucking dude, i’ll give you that. God bless

 

[HotDogJoe]

There’s an art to it.

A craft even, baby boy

 

[Pat the Simp]

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The best thing about Wednesday being a hit is all the shit being generated by the internet meme machine. Me on the left!

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But without further ado, episode 4! The Rave'N episode! The one episode, more than any others, that spreads via word-of-mouth disease. Oh you gotta watch the Wednesday dance! You gotta make your own Tiktok version! There are a ton of lonely 30-something women, where the highlight of their life was seeing the Harry Potter Yule Ball, this episode is what they've waiting for.

Okay so there's two cute boys. The first is Xavier, a tall glass of brooding artist.

Wednesday and Xavier sit next to each other in Ricci class! Wednesday notices bite marks and investigates his art studio, where she finds pictures of the evil monster terrorizing the woods, making Xavier her #1 suspect. Xavier catches her in the act, and to save face she invites him to the Rave'N, which he graciously accepts!

But then she runs into the other boy, Tyler:

Quick shoutout to the youtube shipping community for most of these pictures! Anyway, she confesses to Tyler she's going to the Rave'N with Xavier and Tyler gets all bitchy and emotional about it, but Wednesday feels bad. Then Xavier catches her snooping for evidence again, deduces she never wanted to go to the Rave'N and was just investigating him, and breaks off their date! Two cute boys mad at Wednesday, zero Rave'N dates, oh no! Wednesday plans to investigate the monster with her platonic friend Eugene, who has a crush on her roommate.

Oh yeah her roommate has a subplot where she goes with a bully black kid who is trying to be a better person and they bond over NHL hockey and Kung Fu movies. She DOESN'T go with the guy who stood her up last episode. Back to Jenna...

She opens the door expecting Eugene only to find... Tyler? In a nice suit? Saying he got the nice note she sent? Turns out Thing asked out Tyler on Wednesday's behalf, got her a dress and everything! Blah blah blah, let's get to the dance!



It's gotten so popular because it's such an enigma. Is this someone who has never danced in their life flailing about aimlessly? Is she such a good dancer she can reinvent dancing, aggressively dancing at her partner instead of with him? Has she called on some supernatural demon to possess and distort her body in order to "dance"? The little tap-tap-pop-up at 0:25 is my favorite.

Then, uh, the black kid's bully friends Carrie the entire party but use red paint and not pig blood, Wednesday gets a vision that Eugene is hurt and rushes to save him. We'll get to all that next week, this week let's stay on the dance floor!

Tik tok is so gay.

 

[aRTie02150]

Tik tok is so gay.

It really is poison.

I've been forced to to watch so many stupid fucking videos because of it.

 

[ShutYourCakeHorn]

This faggot has fled the forum like the coward he is while Jenna is the future of this place and Hollywood, Jennachads just can't stop winning!

 

[Queefer Sutherland]

 

[Jenna]

Calling it now, Jenna pops the biggest SNL rating of the season. I checked wiki and Martin/Short currently have the lead with 5.06 million, Jenna with a decently popular band behind her can top that.

 

[Jenna]

Holy shit what a champ, she shows less pain than the host! Smug little bitch takes a second bite of their hottest sauce for funsies. The only thing that broke her was the concept of peas in guacamole.

 

[BakersfieldChimp]

@Jenna you see this, brothaman?

 

[Jenna]

Next year, Ortegaheads.

LEADING Actress in a Comedy Series 2023. And the Emmy.