I've been called sexy

[Stent]

People often mention his hair plugs, but don't forget he clearly has fake teeth too. I'm also fairly sure he's had several botox treatments over the years, much like his secret idol Samantha from Sex and the City.

He looks grotesque with all those enhancements, so imagine the Dorian Gray - esque abomination that hides beneath.

Looks like he's had some Kardashian-sized butt implants but that's Cumia genetics.

Dawn wishes her ass still popped like that.

 

[Harry Powell]

After slipping on his ladies shoes, Andy Espresso admired his reflection in the full length mirror. "I've been called thexyyyyyyy" he lisped seductively to himself, his cratered, booze-sodden face a mask of hideous lust and unbridled depravity. Andy began vamping and prancing about the room with his hands on his hips in an exaggerated, swishy manner. "You all just hate how happy I am and how much FUN I'm having!" he purred. Sashaying his way to the bed, Andy then leaned over and creakily attempted to twerk, swiveling his hips back and forth in an almost spastic manner. He craned his neck to catch a glimpse of his reflection in the mirror. "That's right, you're a puss slayer, aren't you, big boy!" he cooed to himself.

Suddenly Andy heard a loud crack and felt a sharp pain radiate through his neck and shoulders. "Uh oh, hahahaHAholeeeeeshit! OWWWW! Your mother's cunt!" Andy groaned. His vitamin D depleted bones and withered, atrophied muscles finally gave way, and Andy was stuck, unable to move, in a nightgown and high heels, with his ass in the air. His beard would be home at any moment. How would he explain his way out of THIS one?

I love his fixation with FUN

 

[GetOffMyLawn_3]

This is what years of binge drinking does to you

 

[Ha Ha Ha Holeee Shit!]

This is what years of binge drinking does to you

Seriously, I cut back drinking because of him. He’s a cautionary tale.

 

[RoSmokedCrack]

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It looks like he's been sleeping in those dishevelled ill-fitting clothes for daaaays.

Can we also have a good laugh at the fact Nana at 65 is now wearing ripped jeans.