If you were confronted by Pat would he call 911 for clean up?

[Jenna]

If it's a controlled setting, do I get time to MMA train? I'm not a fighter but I played sports in high school, so give me three months of training and I'm walking to the ring with murderous eyes, Ain't It Fun as my entrance music.

 

[guest]

Where’s @Ricci Ryda when you need him..

 

[Sputnik]

Pat was granted a license to kill from Biden personally. I ain’t gonna mess with him.

 

[TorqueWheeler]

I would absolutely beat the fucking shit out of Pat.

 

[LockedHDD__Pot]

Pat was granted a license to kill from Biden personally. I ain’t gonna mess with him.

I was legally obliged to register his hands as lethal weapons

 

[guest]

This guy wrote the blueprint to follow

[MEDIA=youtube]p6Ba2B7icSU[/MEDIA]

 

[Torque Army]

I'm legit psychotic at times but not nearly as retarded as Fatrick. I'd fuck him up given the chance.

 

[DiarrheaDick]

I'd just urinate on his feet and I would imagine he'd just start frantically tweeting a pic of the stream splashing off his dumb hobit feet, saying things like, "stlakers at it again. He has no idea what would happen if he took another step forward!" or "Everday I've been dealing with this. For. Four. Years."

It'd be silly to call 911 to wash his feet. Plus the pity points are more valuable to him than putting the L down for a second to spoon feed me my own teeth.

 

[guest]

How would the brothermen square up in the ring? In an honest controlled setting could you take a 6 ft 220 pound trained fighter?

The 40% has it. Now go get your shine box. That’s a Goodfellas reference, Dan.

 

[Hoolies]

Since we already have fifteen strong contenders, guess I'd take look if Pat's still moving, then either go through his wallet or try to get some of the guys back in it. "Two subpoenas, Cave'. You feeling that second wind coming on?"

 

[JoeCumiawearsDIAPERS]

How would you fare against Danny Ross, assuming he doesn’t pull his “I’LL SUE YOU!” bullshit?

Pretty well I think, although I don’t hate him like I hate Nana and Jim Norton so I’m pretty sure I’d just walk away as he whines about god knows what.

For Nana, I’d try to befriend him first and then when he says HA HA HOLEE SHIT I’d punch him square in his toilet bowl teeth and stare him in the eye as his eyes welled up with water in disbelief. I’d probably say something about Joe Sr. Being disappointed.

As for Norton, I’d convince him I fought MMA and then have him ask me to put him in a hold, which would be the Crippler Crossface a la Chris Benoit or something that made him think I was going to break his neck so he’d beg for his life.

If you’re wondering where Opie fits into all this - I’d probably get crushed under the enormous weight of his cock.

Thats all I got.

 

[Pringle Can Lothario]

Judging by the condition of the hovel and rustbox, I don’t think he knows what cleaning up is.

And he has the gall to write a blog about car maintenance.

 

[UnPRePared]

All he'd have to do is yell "Phil Collins was better!" at one of my concerts, and you'd see my eyes turn green like Bill Bixby.

 

[IGotATreeOnMyHouse85]

I would try to de escalate because it's not a good look to beat up a mentally challenged person

I think that’s why he hasn’t had his ass kicked often, people know he’s a retard.