I cannot believe this is a 42 year old man deconstructing Star Wars

[FurBurger]

Fatrick writes:

2) I am the slowest reader in the entire world. Maybe because I'm very deliberate when I read. But my TBR pile is an atrocity.

Trust me, your entire written output is worse.

 

[Will Tate]

Sci Fi died after the fifties, I believe that.

I can watch Forbidden Planet and the original Day The Earth Stood Still, Thing From Another World, and even 60's Star Trek, but Star Wars was the death blow to all of it. ALL OF IT. Any brain and heart that original science fiction had, whether cheesy schlock that amused or deep allegory that challenged your thoughts, left the building and was replaced by bright colors and explosions, with quippy one liners added later.

If Isaac Asimov was still alive, he would kick Pat right in his little dick.

It was always just Flash Gordon fan-fiction with the serial numbers filed off, nothing more, nothing less. The only veneer of legitimacy it ever had was Joseph Campbell telling Lucas, "Yeah, this is a pretty decent example of the Hero's Journey, nice job, stupid."

 

[UnPRePared]

It was always just Flash Gordon fan-fiction with the serial numbers filed off, nothing more, nothing less. The only veneer of legitimacy it ever had was Joseph Campbell telling Lucas, "Yeah, this is a pretty decent example of the Hero's Journey, nice job, stupid."

It's only a good example of the hero's journey because Lucas ripped off Kurosawa's Hidden Fortress and painted science fiction and lasers all over it.

He couldn't even fucking hide how much he ripped that movie off.

 

[JoeBrotheChildSpitGuzzler]

A bunch of the big toy companies at the time passed on it before it landed at Kenner--Mattell, Hasbro, Parker Brothers, Mego. Poor marketing wasn't the problem, it was Kenner not being able to get any of the action figures on the market until months after the movie came out, so they sold cardboard certificates instead that you could use to mail away and get four figures when they came out the following Christmas. I am not proud that I know this.

I seem to remember that George Lucas retained the rights to the merchandise for the Star Wars series.. and he ended up making far more on that than he ever did on the movies themselves. I also remember the fact about the cardboard certs, and read the books based on the series, so i'm a fag as well.

 

[Easily_Remembered]

A bunch of the big toy companies at the time passed on it before it landed at Kenner--Mattell, Hasbro, Parker Brothers, Mego. Poor marketing wasn't the problem, it was Kenner not being able to get any of the action figures on the market until months after the movie came out, so they sold cardboard certificates instead that you could use to mail away and get four figures when they came out the following Christmas. I am not proud that I know this.

The Early Bird kit. It's still crazy how that gamble paid off.

It's only a good example of the hero's journey because Lucas ripped off Kurosawa's Hidden Fortress and painted science fiction and lasers all over it.

He couldn't even fucking hide how much he ripped that movie off.

He ripped it off so much in his earlier versions of it that he was beginning to look into simply getting the rights to remake it, as it was so blatant. R2 D2 and C-3PO are still the most blatant evidence of this thievery.

 

[guest]

I
saw that trailer (Moonfall) at a preview last month and it made me viscerally angry. I just BROODED, man.

It looks worse then "2012". Unbelievable...

 

[Will Tate]

I seem to remember that George Lucas retained the rights to the merchandise for the Star Wars series.. and he ended up making far more on that than he ever did on the movies themselves. I also remember the fact about the cardboard certs, and read the books based on the series, so i'm a fag as well.

Yeah he retained all the merchandising rights overall, but ironically with the Kenner deal specifically he really got screwed because they were the only company willing to deal with him. I don't remember the exact numbers, but I think Lucas only got a small fraction of the Kenner sales, he was only able to renegotiate years later because Kenner didn't live up to a clause that they had to make $10K in sales per year or cut Lucasfilm a check for that amount or else they'd lose the rights. By the time Hasbro bought Kenner there'd been a good few years with no product, let alone $10K/year's worth, so they had to go into negotiations with their assholes pre-lubed.

Biggest takeaway here is Pa's ever-expanding waistline.

The Early Bird kit. It's still crazy how that gamble paid off.


He ripped it off so much in his earlier versions of it that he was beginning to look into simply getting the rights to remake it, as it was so blatant. R2 D2 and C-3PO are still the most blatant evidence of this thievery.

It still laugh at how early concept art of C-3PO is just that robot from Metropolis.

 

[JoeBrotheChildSpitGuzzler]

Yeah he retained all the merchandising rights overall, but ironically with the Kenner deal specifically he really got screwed because they were the only company willing to deal with him. I don't remember the exact numbers, but I think Lucas only got a small fraction of the Kenner sales, he was only able to renegotiate years later because Kenner didn't live up to a clause that they had to make $10K in sales per year or cut Lucasfilm a check for that amount or else they'd lose the rights. By the time Hasbro bought Kenner there'd been a good few years with no product, let alone $10K/year's worth, so they had to go into negotiations with their assholes pre-lubed.

Biggest takeaway here is Pa's ever-expanding waistline.


It still laugh at how early concept art of C-3PO is just that robot from Metropolis.

Yea, that makes sense. Almost like Large Jewcus cares more about keeping the money machine running than the actually content

 

[Dummy Gaynuts]

I am so disinterested in sci-fi stuff that trying to read those four tweets that he made bored me.

And I actually had to Google who Boba Fett was. At least his suit looks cool.

Its the only reason Boba Fett is even popular: he was a cool looking action figure for children

 

[Clint Ruin]

Sci Fi died after the fifties, I believe that.

I can watch Forbidden Planet and the original Day The Earth Stood Still, Thing From Another World, and even 60's Star Trek, but Star Wars was the death blow to all of it. ALL OF IT. Any brain and heart that original science fiction had, whether cheesy schlock that amused or deep allegory that challenged your thoughts, left the building and was replaced by bright colors and explosions, with quippy one liners added later.

If Isaac Asimov was still alive, he would kick Pat right in his little dick.

I know it's hack to say at this point, but Black Mirror had some pretty compelling scifi. They had what 99.9% of scifi "authors" lack now, the ability to pose ethical and existential questions framed through theoretical technology and the implications that technology brought to the table. Otherwise, it's all now "the space marines fight the space wizards in space Rome".

 

[Slackjawed Cow]

They made these movies to sell toys to man babies holding on to their childhood. Kids these days dont collect action figures, its all people pats age. The thing is that they are trying to appeal to the woke crowd and they dont buy the toys. Pat doesnt collect anything from these movies/shows merchandise. He may buy a shirt or some chopsticks but he doesnt have a shelf of figuires. Those are the customers disney is trying to bank on. I used to love star wars as a kid but Im glad they ruined all these franchises with all this forced inclusion and rewriting the canon. Those weirdos can have it. Let these corporations take the financial hit by pandering to people that dont buy the merch. Im just enjoying watching it burn.

 

[FurBurger]

Sci Fi died after the fifties, I believe that.

I can watch Forbidden Planet and the original Day The Earth Stood Still, Thing From Another World, and even 60's Star Trek, but Star Wars was the death blow to all of it. ALL OF IT. Any brain and heart that original science fiction had, whether cheesy schlock that amused or deep allegory that challenged your thoughts, left the building and was replaced by bright colors and explosions, with quippy one liners added later.

If Isaac Asimov was still alive, he would kick Pat right in his little dick.

Star Trek The Next Generation had some decent episodes that "challenged your thoughts"; even The Orville - if you can get past Seth Macfarlane's breathtakingly punchable face - has had a couple of them. The Martian (the book) has heart and brains; the author tried to keep it pretty scientifically accurate and even wrote software to figure out the necessary orbits for the rescue attempt.

And while I didn't like William Gibson's last book, he still writes proper literature - genuine works of art, written with thought, research, and skill.

There's still good stuff out there, just avoid the Michael Bay/Roland Emmerich/Ridley Scott (fuck him for what he did to The Martian/Alien) stuff and you'll be right.

 

[Clint Ruin]

Ridley Scott (fuck him for what he did to The Martian/Alien)

Ridley Scott is this weird case where he does terrible shit most of the time, and then once in a while he accidently makes something great. There's like a twenty percent chance that when he does something, he strikes gold, but the remaining 80% is doddering and incompetent.

 

[JoeBrotheChildSpitGuzzler]

I'd have to agree on the Orville. It's a better star trek than a star trek show has been since DS9 basically. Even MacFarlane's cuckishness can't ruin it

 

[FurBurger]

Ridley Scott is this weird case where he does terrible shit most of the time, and then once in a while he accidently makes something great. There's like a twenty percent chance that when he does something, he strikes gold, but the remaining 80% is doddering and incompetent.

Looking at his IMDB listing, I think that 20% stat is exactly right.

 

[Harry Powell]

I'd have to agree on the Orville. It's a better star trek than a star trek show has been since DS9 basically. Even MacFarlane's cuckishness can't ruin it

Cant believe they didn’t hire Patso

imagine how unbearable he’d be in the writers room