Embarrassing Stories Thread

[sShenaniganz]

I didn't see this thread make it over from the old forum yet and I just had this pop in my head in the shower.

About 4 years ago when I was seeing this girl who didn't drive so I would always pick her up whenever we would hang out. I thought it would make me look cool/mysterious if I had Frank Ocean playing everytime she would get in my car.

I made sure to have Blonde playing before she got in my car. She never said anything until one day, probably after 3 or 4 times of me doing this, she says "You really like Frank Ocean huh?" with this cacophony of disgust and confusion on her face.

I immediately turned it off and never played it again. What a stupid faggot I am.

 

[Gay Faggot.]

I didn't see this thread make it over from the old forum yet and I just had this pop in my head in the shower.

About 4 years ago when I was seeing this girl who didn't drive so I would always pick her up whenever we would hang out. I thought it would make me look cool/mysterious if I had Frank Ocean playing everytime she would get in my car.

I made sure to have Blonde playing before she got in my car. She never said anything until one day, probably after 3 or 4 times of me doing this, she says "You really like Frank Ocean huh?" with this cacophony of disgust and confusion on her face.

I immediately turned it off and never played it again. What a stupid faggots I am.

Every ounce of my body wants to call you a faggot douche but I did the same thing when I was a teenager. Play some music so people think you’re a bad ass or cool. It would be real Tomlinson shit but, we’re not 41 years old doing it.

 

[sShenaniganz]

Every ounce of my body wants to call you a faggot douche

Right there with you

 

[CuntFucker]

nice... a very contrived Norton-esq move... I wonder how many times Jimmy put on Sabbath in a misguided attempt at impressing people...

 

[CuntFucker]

I tried cutting my own hair when I was 16 years old and fucked it up half way, so I tried salvaging the situation by cutting it all off... and the same night went on a cinema date with a girl from school looking like a cancer victim... everyone was looking and the she laughed quite a bit at me...






...but I still got the girl in the end...

 

[sShenaniganz]

nice... a very contrived Norton-esq move... I wonder how many times Jimmy put on Sabbath in a misguided attempt at impressing people...

This really is the equivalent of the Worm holding up the booxbox blasting Sabbath. What a cool dude.

 

[Coonskin]

That Norton gif is peak embarrassment

 

[HatRemovalService]

I saw Stevie Wonder at a guitar center once and he was a good 30 feet away so I yelled “Stevie!!!” then waved like a retard forgetting the dude is blind

 

[Jim-sucks-shit]

I used to be a fan of the Opie and Anthony show and I've spent the last 2 1/2 years or so harassing some sci-fi writing nobody with a bunch of fucking faggots online.

 

[Gay Faggot.]

I used to be a fan of the Opie and Anthony show and I've spent the last 2 1/2 years or so harassing some sci-fi writing nobody with a bunch of fucking faggots online.

I hear these faggots share embarrassing stories about themselves like teenage girls. What kind of fruits do that shit?

 

[Cyberatorquer]

I saw Stevie Wonder at a guitar center once and he was a good 30 feet away so I yelled “Stevie!!!” then waved like a retard forgetting the dude is blind

it's a nice bit, can make people chuckle.

 

[TokenX]

When I was 19 I went to a peep booth in some shitty part of town when I was drunk. I expected a hot girl but I got some fat girl who just stripped and winked her asshole for me while I jerked off. I couldn't get a boner so I stopped her halfway and just said "sorry" and paid her and left.

 

[ThePepsiColaRapist]

I met Willie Nelson at a Best Buy. Shook his hand, told him how much Redheaded Stranger had impacted a young kid whose primary musical interest at the time had been punk and metal. It was pretty cool.
Got out to the parking lot and saw his tour bus; it was a Willie Nelson Tribute band bus. He just stood there and let me think he was Willie. It was embarrassing, hurtful, and enraging.

 

[guest]

I met Willie Nelson at a Best Buy. Shook his hand, told him how much Redheaded Stranger had impacted a young kid whose primary musical interest at the time had been punk and metal. It was pretty cool.
Got out to the parking lot and saw his tour bus; it was a Willie Nelson Tribute band bus. He just stood there and let me think he was Willie. It was embarrassing, hurtful, and enraging.

Lol! You facking nimrod!

J/k, I can't stop laughing as I imagine the guy looking like this...

 

[JoshFromMichigan]

I met Willie Nelson at a Best Buy. Shook his hand, told him how much Redheaded Stranger had impacted a young kid whose primary musical interest at the time had been punk and metal. It was pretty cool.
Got out to the parking lot and saw his tour bus; it was a Willie Nelson Tribute band bus. He just stood there and let me think he was Willie. It was embarrassing, hurtful, and enraging.

 

[Snake]

Went to see a movie with a girl and got blown and jerked off, and accidentally dropped my coat in my fresly laid load on the floor. We had a loff.

 

[aRTie02150]

I tried farting into a traffic cone to make a super loud noise and ended up pooing my pants.

I also woke up in my underwear in the hallway of a church that I apparently broke into when drunk. Woke up to a father or whatever asking me to leave, politely too.

There are so many more I can't think of ATM.

 

[Coonskin]

I had a shitty day but had plans to go out with this girl I've seen a couple of times. We're hanging out at my place just talking and smoking. She was very sweet and cute, but she starts talking about co-worker drama from her shift and I couldn't even feign the slightest bit of interest. Her story just kept going on and on and I just start getting into my head. A couple of sentences in I'm staring at nothing. She asked me what was wrong and I tell her that "I feel like I could be doing something more productive with my time" and immediately drove her home. Felt like such a douche that I couldn't come up with a decent excuse and just made her feel like a boring piece of shit.

 

[ThePepsiColaRapist]

I'm not even sure if this is embarrassing, but I ate an entire pineapple the other night. I was carving it up and just kept eating one chunk after another. Before I knew it, there wasn't enough left to justify saving, so I polished it off.
I regret nothing.

 

[Gay Faggot.]

I had a shitty day but had plans to go out with this girl I've seen a couple of times. We're hanging out at my place just talking and smoking. She was very sweet and cute, but she starts talking about co-worker drama from her shift and I couldn't even feign the slightest bit of interest. Her story just kept going on and on and I just start getting into my head. A couple of sentences in I'm staring at nothing. She asked me what was wrong and I tell her that "I feel like I could be doing something more productive with my time" and immediately drove her home. Felt like such a douche that I couldn't come up with a decent excuse and just made her feel like a boring piece of shit.

You did the right thing. She has to learn at some point no one gives a fuck. The real question is: Was she very hot and very horny?