• Reminder: Do not call, text, or mention harrassing someone in real life. Do not encourage it. Do not talk about killing or using violence against anyone, or engaging in any criminal behavior. If it is not an obvious joke even when taken out of context, don't post it. Please report violators.

    DMCA, complaints, and other inquiries:

    [email protected]

Bert Kriescher

RobertMewler

Forum Clout
95,939
I refuse to watch him too. He may not be Jewish but ewwww:

8cb1b2b9802600e72d689f353e3e6f16.png
 

Cuphead

Formerly know as Fat Abbot
Forum Clout
49,488
its not even his story, the tldr is: "i couldnt speak the language, I ran into some russian mobsters on the train and i spilled my spaghetti on the ground by shouting "I'm the machine!". Once the mobsters realized i was retarded they thought I was funny and they made me drink with them for the duration of the trip and we had all kinds of wacky adventures!"

it's really not that funny, maybe it will get a chuckle the first time around but it's not a bit you can replay at all because it's so drawn out and lacks real jokes
They are making a fucking movie based off that bullshit story
 

Punished Dan Mullen

Calamari Ring Leader
Forum Clout
16,411
There's 'comedians' and then there's 'podcast comedians'.

Bert's the worst of the last category. Despite how much he pops up, hysterically laughing at his own comments, I dont think I've ever found his content the least bit amusing.
hes always telling BS story, if you watch the posalin doc he always have to one up others story, if someone said he saw a guy get hit by lightning he would say he saw 3 guys got hit by lighning and it burnt off their tongue etc
 

Smeckler's Powder

Sweet powder eases the pain
Forum Clout
16,790
He says he’s such a fan of the art of comedy, but he has admitted to feeling compelled to tell the machine joke at every gig strictly because the crowd demands it, that it’s become his Dice bit now. He’s said that people recite the bit just the same as the nursery lines. Ok dummy, now do a movie about it to ruin the mental image of what your fans have come to imagine from hearing the bit, ad nauseum.

It's gonna be like "I hope they serve beer in hell"
 

Jims_Maroon_Pants

Joe's Filipino Supervisor
Forum Clout
62,615
I have never watched him do standup I just know him as the faggot who takes off his shirt because that equals funny. What is the machine story he tells? I tried watching it and tapped out in 2 seconds when the crowd clapped and barked like seals as if this classic stand up bit is what they came to see. Clapped and cheered in the right place if you will.
Also the comments make me irrationally angry. "We should send him to ukraine and have this solved right away" unless he means because he would be killed then both the commenter and Bert should kill themselves.


Shirt's off, that means funny!
 

ShutYourCakeHorn

Gassers/Say "Cookie" Alt
Forum Clout
73,476
Bert is so butthurt he isn't the center of attention for 10 minutes in this clip, he's a narcissistic piece of shit, only cares about himself.




I don't listen to this godawful podcast btw, this clip just got recommended to me because i was going down a Norm rabbit hole on YouTube.
 

CorradoSoprano4

Forum Clout
24,603
I still have PTSD and you post this shit???


What the fuck is wrong with you? Have you no sympathy for a fellow brotherman?
These ssscumbags!
 
Top