Airport diva Jim strikes again

[guest]

Why don’t you ask to speak to their manager? Fucking worm!

[URL unfurl="true"]https://twitter.com/jimnorton/status/1598375808296488961?s=46&t=IUT93w6GkVRNsuqiKH9c_Q[/URL]

 

[guest]

Those sccuuummmbags. Jim is just angry he had to wait longer to get groped by a man in a uniform.

 

[Slackjawed Cow]

SSSScumbags

 

[The Greaseman]

Flying to meet with his boyfriend?

 

[Gay Faggot.]

Didn’t Norton take a pro TSA stance at first to protect us against those evil Muslims? Maybe I’m conflating it with something but, he is a faggot worm.

 

[LAZERBEAMZ]

What's the deal with these lines at the DMV?

 

[guest]

Flying to meet with his boyfriend?

 

[Rutherford_b_Blaze]

Always loved when baby boy who lived on unemployment until he was 30 would shit on working people.

 

[Naked_Militiaman]

Didn’t Norton take a pro TSA stance at first to protect us against those evil Muslims? Maybe I’m conflating it with something but, he is a faggot worm.

Was gonna say the same thing…Jim used to defend the TSA all the time on the show and rage-tweet his support when Jesse Ventura and Rand Paul would trash them. He really is a worm.

 

[FingerofGod]

Didn’t Norton take a pro TSA stance at first to protect us against those evil Muslims? Maybe I’m conflating it with something but, he is a faggot worm.

Really bugs me that a few comics went to iraq and came back gung-ho patriots. Comics are the biggest manchildren on the planet, it makes me sick when they try to act tough on issues like muslims when there’s way more to the story than that.

 

[LingerLonger]

Didn’t Norton take a pro TSA stance at first to protect us against those evil Muslims? Maybe I’m conflating it with something but, he is a faggot worm.

Really bugs me that a few comics went to iraq and came back gung-ho patriots. Comics are the biggest manchildren on the planet, it makes me sick when they try to act tough on issues like muslims when there’s way more to the story than that.

After 9/11 literally every radio show and talk show and comic might as well have been Blackwater contractors or DIA employees. On O&A almost any guest or caller that questioned the official 9/11 narrative or the war on terror was treated like a complete retard or waste of life. O&A and Norton would literally foam at the mouth talking up the war and ridiculing anyone who dared question the (((government account))) of the 9/11 attacks.

 

[FingerofGod]

After 9/11 literally every radio show and talk show and comic might as well have been Blackwater contractors or DIA employees. On O&A almost any guest or caller that questioned the official 9/11 narrative or the war on terror was treated like a complete retard or waste of life. O&A and Norton would literally foam at the mouth talking up the war and ridiculing anyone who dared question the (((government account))) of the 9/11 attacks.

They really should never have talked politics. Absolute retards. I think most people would agree at this point that the last 20 years of bullshit wars were a mistake and we’re paying for it now. Why do we have to police the world while our own country gets flooded with immigrants and generally turns to shit? I definitely put some of the blame on the “we need to get revenge on muslims” type of people like the o&a guys were. Especially now that there seems to be way more evidence that america at the very least knew a big terrorist attack on american soil was coming and turned a blind eye.

 

[NigelCumia]

They really are assholes for going home when their shift is over and not working for free to accommodate grateful people like Jim.

 

[LaylaCumiasMoistHotPocket]

Baby James bringing the heat. Really gave em the biz.

 

[Rutherford_b_Blaze]

They really are assholes for going home when their shift is over and not working for free to accommodate grateful people like Jim.

Jim also always hated when sccccccumbag employees would try to keep their jobs by following rules

 

[Naked_Militiaman]

ANY ONE OF YOU COULD’VE CALLED IN

 

[BonnieMcFarlaneMe2]

Always loved when baby boy who lived on unemployment until he was 30 would shit on working people.

I think he drove a forklift for two summers.

 

[guest]

[SIZE=13px]Didn’t Norton take a pro TSA stance at first to protect us against those evil Muslims? Maybe I’m conflating it with something but, he is a faggot worm.[/SIZE]

Really bugs me that a few comics went to iraq and came back gung-ho patriots. Comics are the biggest manchildren on the planet, it makes me sick when they try to act tough on issues like muslims when there’s way more to the story than that.

But let’s get to the other fellow traveler on the Iraq journey, one James “Mommy, why does that man have a cascading neck?” Norton. It was my tour, and like a magnanimous Sunni chieftain I was kind enough to bring Jim along. He came cheap. His dressing room rider included: wood chips instead of a rug, a giant wheel for exercise, and pellet food.

The first few shows went off without a hitch. Then we hit New Year’s Eve. We’re in the tent getting ready for the big show at one of Saddam’s palaces, when the USO representative, Tracy, informs us that, due to possible danger from incoming insurgent fire, the show might have to be canceled.

Of course, I took this news with the grace and low-key humility that I’ve worked tirelessly to display. So everything is fine. Laurie is cool. Ellen is cool. Tracy is cool. I’m cool. But then suddenly I hear a quiet buzzing in the tent.

At first I thought it was one of the giant flying insects that have been flying around this part of the world since the Old Testament. I looked around for a newspaper to put a stop to it, when suddenly we all looked and realized it wasn’t an insect—at least not in the conventional sense. No, it was Jim muttering to himself and walking spastically around the room in circles waiting for someone to notice him and ask what was the problem.

Tracy or Ellen inquired and Jim, with a look of sullen reproach on his idiotic baby face, blurts out, “I’ve been doing comedy for twelve years, and I’ve never missed a New Year’s show.” He sulks dramatically; the rest of us stand in stunned silence.

Let me state the situation one more time. We were in Iraq. In a war zone. There are boys and girls putting their young bodies in harm’s way every day to defend our barely defensible way of life here in the United States. They’re not getting a lot of high-profile celebrity visits. (I know that you knew that from the fact that we were there.) But the celebrities that do visit at least give these brave youngsters the reassurance that people appreciate the sacrificial nature of what they are trying to do.

In the midst of that, this incubated hatchling is strutting around, quacking, feathers ruffling, because people don’t realize that this trip is not about giving brief respite to the nineteen-year-olds seeing the frontline horrors and depravities that will never leave their minds. No, no, no, no, no. That’s important, sure. But more pressing is keeping the torch lit on the unnoticed and immaterial New Year’s record of this ludicrous goblin.

I bet our troops would have doubled their valor and courage if they knew that they were protecting the right of a drone to live in a movie within his own mind—a movie in which twelve December 31s in various New Jersey townships drinking a post-show glass of cream soda while being treated to a perfunctory suck-off by a bewildered blubber bunny trying not to smear her hair glitter matter at all, to anyone.

That’s why we could never win in Iraq, because we’re all under the impression that our way of life is precious. Even a guy like Jim Norton is clinging to his one empty tradition like anyone gives a care. My prayers for his death, as always, went unanswered.

 

[Zeroman]

But let’s get to the other fellow traveler on the Iraq journey, one James “Mommy, why does that man have a cascading neck?” Norton. It was my tour, and like a magnanimous Sunni chieftain I was kind enough to bring Jim along. He came cheap. His dressing room rider included: wood chips instead of a rug, a giant wheel for exercise, and pellet food.

The first few shows went off without a hitch. Then we hit New Year’s Eve. We’re in the tent getting ready for the big show at one of Saddam’s palaces, when the USO representative, Tracy, informs us that, due to possible danger from incoming insurgent fire, the show might have to be canceled.

Of course, I took this news with the grace and low-key humility that I’ve worked tirelessly to display. So everything is fine. Laurie is cool. Ellen is cool. Tracy is cool. I’m cool. But then suddenly I hear a quiet buzzing in the tent.

At first I thought it was one of the giant flying insects that have been flying around this part of the world since the Old Testament. I looked around for a newspaper to put a stop to it, when suddenly we all looked and realized it wasn’t an insect—at least not in the conventional sense. No, it was Jim muttering to himself and walking spastically around the room in circles waiting for someone to notice him and ask what was the problem.

Tracy or Ellen inquired and Jim, with a look of sullen reproach on his idiotic baby face, blurts out, “I’ve been doing comedy for twelve years, and I’ve never missed a New Year’s show.” He sulks dramatically; the rest of us stand in stunned silence.

Let me state the situation one more time. We were in Iraq. In a war zone. There are boys and girls putting their young bodies in harm’s way every day to defend our barely defensible way of life here in the United States. They’re not getting a lot of high-profile celebrity visits. (I know that you knew that from the fact that we were there.) But the celebrities that do visit at least give these brave youngsters the reassurance that people appreciate the sacrificial nature of what they are trying to do.

In the midst of that, this incubated hatchling is strutting around, quacking, feathers ruffling, because people don’t realize that this trip is not about giving brief respite to the nineteen-year-olds seeing the frontline horrors and depravities that will never leave their minds. No, no, no, no, no. That’s important, sure. But more pressing is keeping the torch lit on the unnoticed and immaterial New Year’s record of this ludicrous goblin.

I bet our troops would have doubled their valor and courage if they knew that they were protecting the right of a drone to live in a movie within his own mind—a movie in which twelve December 31s in various New Jersey townships drinking a post-show glass of cream soda while being treated to a perfunctory suck-off by a bewildered blubber bunny trying not to smear her hair glitter matter at all, to anyone.

That’s why we could never win in Iraq, because we’re all under the impression that our way of life is precious. Even a guy like Jim Norton is clinging to his one empty tradition like anyone gives a care. My prayers for his death, as always, went unanswered.

I like that you used “magnanimous”.

 

[guest]

I like that you used “magnanimous”.

It's from CQ's The Coloring Book