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The Hilarity of Ant Trying To Be a Baller in NYC

CuckQueen

On the Joe Cumia retirement plan.
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3,395
Ant always valued his salary as a justification of his worth and sole way to attract women, but that dumb, poor nigger lived in NYC. The Metropolitan Opera has a donation circle for yearly gifts of a million dollars or more. Ant was a wop minnow in the ocean. How did he expect to impress anyone but genetic freaks and retards?
 

Gay Faggot.

When the frying pan hits just right.
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78,028
He didn’t. The fanciest person cumia ever dated was the child of those Clinton staffers or whatever it was. Bottom rung. Lord knows if he actually had money he could date rich children since they’re child molesters too. Retard wop.
 
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JoeBrotheChildSpitGuzzler

Grand Cyclops of the Digital Ku Klux Klan
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48,727
yup. Ant gravitated towards losers weirdos and hangers on because he wanted to feel like a big shot. But since his life was basically doing the show, going home and drinking he never had any connection to anyone IRL, so he had to settle for Danny, Erock and the Amber Alert Crew. Or gambling at the Borgata with the other low life guineas. So despite having all this money, he's still just trashy. He knows if he steps out of his bubble of people who are impressed by an in ground pool and a dinosaur prop, he'd realize he's not nearly as big a deal as he thinks he is.

But who am I telling? Basically the reason the sub turned on him and savaged Joe was because he still saw himself as above the fans, who were the only ones who ever really gave a shit. At least Opie is so narcissistic he can ignore the fans without antagonizing them.
 

Snake

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48,434
yup. Ant gravitated towards losers weirdos and hangers on because he wanted to feel like a big shot. But since his life was basically doing the show, going home and drinking he never had any connection to anyone IRL, so he had to settle for Danny, Erock and the Amber Alert Crew. Or gambling at the Borgata with the other low life guineas. So despite having all this money, he's still just trashy. He knows if he steps out of his bubble of people who are impressed by an in ground pool and a dinosaur prop, he'd realize he's not nearly as big a deal as he thinks he is.

But who am I telling? Basically the reason the sub turned on him and savaged Joe was because he still saw himself as above the fans, who were the only ones who ever really gave a shit. At least Opie is so narcissistic he can ignore the fans without antagonizing them.
Vurry guuuud.
 
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53,392
Ant gravitated towards losers weirdos and hangers on because he wanted to feel like a big shot.
Nana liked to think he's the alpha wolf of his little pack, the main cog without whom the other gears can't turn. He was the big shot hosting karaoke night at his tacky mansion and throwing money around at the casino, while his envious "pals" giggled and tittered and acted awe-stricken over being in the presence of a big-time radio shock jock. He even chose his home based on his fanciful notions, making sure it had plenty of "guest bedrooms" where his wacky pals could "crash" after another fabulous all-night party.

Past tense, because then Nana discovered his one true love...tweeting. Once he started tweeting he didn't need his collection of low-life scumbag buddies anymore, as he could reach more "followers" (who hadn't yet heard his various sad bleatings ten million times already) without doing anything but sitting there alone in the dark with "Barnaby Jones" reruns flickering quietly in the background. No more picking up tabs, no more skeptical glances after being caught eye-fucking someone's eleven year old daughter, just him and his very important thoughts, 24/7/365.
 
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