Patrick is "by every measure" a complete failure

BudDickman

Here he is asking himself what success means to him:



What does success mean to you: Publishing two books per year, doing four or five stand-up shows per month, and earning enough doing both that I don't have to do anything else.
"Publishing two books per year"
He hasn't published a book in several years. It is unlikely he will ever publish another book.

"doing four or five stand-up shows per month"
He hasn't done stand up in years.

"earning enough doing both that I don't have to do anything else"
He's an Airbnb host. That has to be his main source of income, unless he's still making money selling insurance.

You're a failure, Pat. You suck.
 

Slackjawed Cow

I laugh at them because they're all the same.
Here he is asking himself what success means to him:




"Publishing two books per year"
He hasn't published a book in several years. It is unlikely he will ever publish another book.

"doing four or five stand-up shows per month"
He hasn't done stand up in years.

"earning enough doing both that I don't have to do anything else"
He's an Airbnb host. That has to be his main source of income, unless he's still making money selling insurance.

You're a failure, Pat. You suck.

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DrTorqueCarlisi

Life of my story
"Publishing two books per year"
-By my calculations, that puts him about seven books behind schedule. Currently with no editor or publisher. Nice work ethic, stupit.

"doing four or five stand up shows per month"
-So, at least 300 less than estimated, just since we've been aware of him. Zero upcoming prospects. Nice comedy career, stupit!

"earning enough doing both that I don't have to do anything else"
-Got his mommy-in-law and dinosaur-painting-club frat buddies to pay many of the debts he owed his atalkers. Currently suing the city he lives in and its police force in a pathetic attempt to get out of the hole. Nice retirement plan, stupit!


Also:

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How many times has he tweeted about Elon? Swore he was making money on Elon's dropping stock? This MF even made a Powerpoint calling the billionaire an idiot for wanting to colonize Mars, and then shared the presentation live with eight of his nerd friends. Fuck this obese zilch.
 
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Asking himself the workout and bench press questions are amongst the funniest things he's ever done. I wouldn't ask Chris Hemsworth what his workout routine is never mind Pat.
He's so removed from reality that he thinks "Hey, you look like you work out. What's your routine?" is something one man would say to another, outside of 18th and 8th in Manhattan
 

JoeBrotheChildSpitGuzzler

I Am Racist Man Leader of the Digital Ku Klux Klan
"400 miles a year" Wow, sounds impressive huh? well that averages out to like 7 3/4 miles a week, so if that's 3 runs a week he's doing 2.5 miles a run. Even if it's 2 thats less than 4 miles a run. How is he training to run half marathons when he isn't coming anywhere near running that distance in any given run? I used to run regularly and I got up to running 7-8 miles a go and that was just by regularly doing it and gradually increasing my distance. So either he's lying about the distance (or running at all), which is what I think, or he's just autistically running the same distance and making no progress.
 
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