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Niki not being on the boat is definitive proof they are separated and/or in process of divorce

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Patrick has taken myriad boat selfies over the years and they have ALL included Niki. This is the first time he has taken boat pictures and Niki is nowhere to be found. He takes these pictures to show how perfect and enviable his life is.

Why would he take a day trip on a "$2 million dollar boat" and not include his beautiful wife?
 
TorqueWheeler

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Required reminder that the boat Pat was on cost nowhere close to $2,000,000 and for reference here's one that costs less than that.

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That 1.2GPA really does explain his complete inability to tell even a remotely plausible lie. Probably why he's so fat and ugly too.
 
Jenna

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Her manbaby husband fed the trolls long enough to find one who is really into swatting lolcows. She took the healthy cat and drove off into the sunset in the Mustang.

Who needs a wife when you have 70-something empty nester friends? Nothing better than spending the day on the lake, hearing Larry & Wendy talk about their adult children.
 
TheGhostOfAbeVigoda

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Jenna said:
Her manbaby husband fed the trolls long enough to find one who is really into swatting lolcows. She took the healthy cat and drove off into the sunset in the Mustang.

Who needs a wife when you have 70-something empty nester friends? Nothing better than spending the day on the lake, hearing Larry & Wendy talk about their adult children.
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Pat's desperately trying to befriend elderly people he perceives as rich so he can get written into the will. "To Patrick, the fat idiot son I never had, I bequeath my sailboat that I paid $3500 for in 1997."
 
FurBurger

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I think that's why Nikki wasn't home for the (alleged) swatting, why he was in the rental apartment when it happened, why the rental had loose boxes blocking the doorway during his big fat TV interview, and why he had to take a train to his last con.

I think Nikki's booted him to the other half of the hovel while she gets her shit out. I think she left to go to her mother's to get her head together and made him move his stuff to the other half, and he figured he'd call in a fake swatting to her half while she was out. Obviously that backfired, and they came and double-handcuffed pork boy.

Meanwhile, Nikki's decided to leave him before Quasi's hammer descends as it might get her out of paying for Pat's hubris, and demanded to use Susan to help her move her shit. Pat, being an Alpha Male, whimpered and said yes, before catching the train to Fat Camp (or whatever the con is called)

The last photo he posted of her (that I saw on here) was of her walking in front, instead of the usual two-person widescreen selfie; this leads me to believe he wasn't there at the time of the photo, and just stole it from her private social media and posted it to stop the pests winning.
 
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FurBurger said:
I think that's why Nikki wasn't home for the (alleged) swatting, why he was in the rental apartment when it happened, why the rental had loose boxes blocking the doorway during his big fat TV interview, and why he had to take a train to his last con.

I think Nikki's booted him to the other half of the hovel while she gets her shit out. I think she left to go to her mother's to get her head together and made him move his stuff to the other half, and he figured he'd call in a fake swatting to her half while she was out. Obviously that backfired, and they came and double-handcuffed pork boy.

Meanwhile, Nikki's decided to leave him before Quasi's hammer descends as it might get her out of paying for Pat's hubris, and demanded to use Susan to help her move her shit. Pat, being an Alpha Male, whimpered and said yes, before catching the train to Fat Camp (or whatever the con is called)

The last photo he posted of her (that I saw on here) was of her walking in front, instead of the usual two-person widescreen selfie; this leads me to believe he wasn't there at the time of the photo, and just stole it from her private social media and posted it to stop the pests winning.
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He also pointed out that she was "right next to me" and laughing as he wasted a half hour texting me, she's gone is my guess.
 
IGotATreeOnMyHouse85

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covidcumia said:
He also pointed out that she was "right next to me" and laughing as he wasted a half hour texting me, she's gone is my guess.
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He’s been mentioning her randomly more often on twitter, he rarely ever did that until recently which makes me think she’s long gone. The “right next to me laughing” is what he wishes she was doing, she never found his nonsense funny and I’m guessing her mom said enough and took her retarded daughter away from the retarded fat man.
 
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