Morgan Spurlock has died...

[Professor Rape]

..laughing from seeing rich vos, who will be at the comedy mothership june 28.

Wait

Wait no, hes really dead, sorry

 

[Kinderman]

I heard that he was actually an alcoholic, and he was drinking the whole time they made Supersize Me. So when the doctor said “wow you have an alcoholic’s liver” he lied and said it was just from some Big Macs.

 

[DMAN]

Do you understand I'm here with the Salvation Army taking care of things? Do you understand there's NOWHERE in the city you can go without getting a ticket now? Because I'm with the police sergeant, and he TOLD me so? I got the COMPLETE police department looking for YOU. The entire police department is looking for you guys. Right as we speak. Wherever you park, you get ticketed. Wherever you walk, you get ticketed. Special Police Operations Lieutenant Winslow. Ya heh me? I got it under control. I got a hat. D'ya understand what I'm saying? ......I got a hat. He says ya getting a ticket now. I got the hat now. YOU don't have the hat. I'm with the Salvation Army. I'm with the lieutenant, and I got the hat. I'm on with Tom Kennedy. We're talking about HATS... We're saying "I'm ovah Here now" This is how friendly we are. I'm over here, and we talk like that. Then he's going "I don't see Opie & Anthony walking around with the hat on." Tom Kennedy says to me -- "We give YOU the hat... Not O&A." But the thing is -- Is that HE don't got the hat EITHER. I GOT THE HAT ON!!! Right now, I am down at Ground Zero, with the lieutenant, and the whole Kennedy clan is here. I'm a police General Officer. I drive around in a Lincoln, OLD SCHOOL. I oughta arrest you, and put you in jail, and sentence you to Judge Kennedy. WHERE IS BLOOMBERG??? I'm seeing sodas down here. I'm seeing opened bottles ah watuh out here. I wanna see GOOD STUFF!!! Where is That Bloomberg?

 

[Not bad]

Most people don't seem to get how a Vos roll works. The title isn't supposed to be a lie, only shameless promotion clickbait.

Title: Putin is reportedly dead
Post: set on catching Ris Vos at...

 

[HR@PaneraBread]

again?

 

[Professor Rape]

Most people don't seem to get how a Vos roll works. The title isn't supposed to be a lie, only shameless promotion clickbait.

Title: Putin is reportedly dead
Post: set on catching Ris Vos at...

how is that different from what i did lol

 

[The Talking Dead]

I heard that he was actually an alcoholic, and he was drinking the whole time they made Supersize Me. So when the doctor said “wow you have an alcoholic’s liver” he lied and said it was just from some Big Macs.

I’m surprised Mcds never tried to sue the annoying cunt if that’s the case. Anyway he’s dead now so needless to say, they had the last laugh.

 

[Not bad]

how is that different from what i did lol

Well my example draws people in with dramatic news that turns out to be a complete misdirection for the sake of plugging Rich Vos's shitty gig. You go from dramtic to something extremely trivial.

If I wrote "Putin has died... laughing", he's still dead, and the gig is no longer the noteworthy piece of information in the thread.

 

[Professor Rape]

I’m surprised Mcds never tried to sue the annoying cunt if that’s the case. Anyway he’s dead now so needless to say, they had the last laugh.

View attachment 207347

I just don't understand how "I gained weight by eating lots of calories" was meant to be some shocking development. Were people just retarded back then and didn't know about total daily calories and how you shouldnt go over? Because you also had the subway guy where the whole shtick was "eat these and you'll lose weight!"

 

[Not bad]

When did this happen?