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Last night I wrote and had a couple drinks with my honey

BudDickman

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41,272
... at a Brady Street bar called The Garage. Great spot. Love it. Things got weird.

A guest entered. Middle age dude, mid 50's, well dressed, a little short, pistol holster over his right hip. Cordial at first. Smiling.

Sat down, ordered a drink. Talked to a couple of us for a bit. But within ten minutes, he was talking loudly to my bartender buddy.

Apparently he'd been there the night before and had a run in with the bouncer who said he looked homeless.

As he relayed the story, he took money out of his wallet and started waving it aroundn demanding "Does a homeless guy have $500?"

Then, he took a shoe off and held it up to announce to the whole bar that they were Italian leather and cost $300. Khrushchev move.

At this point, he exits, leaving an uneaten burger behind, and we all laugh about him. But then, twenty minutes later, he comes back.

Apparently he was just outside harassing one of the waitresses serving the sidewalk tables, telling her about the Toyota he drives.

Back inside, he waits until my bartender buddy has to go run some dishes to the kitchen and steps behind the bar to harass customers.

When asked to get out from behind the bar, he argues where "behind the bar" technically starts. Then, he really lost it.

Burger still uneaten, he lays a $50 bill on top of his food, then proceeds to empty an entire bottle of ketchup and mustard on it.

Then he tells the bartender to keep the tip. There's no bouncer that night, and I've fucking had it with him. So words get exchanged.

I make it abundantly clear that he needs to leave and never show his face again. Leprechaun runs his mouth all the way to the door.

Moral of the story. Successful folk don't need to wave their shoes to prove themselves, and peolpe who abuse waitstaff are trash.
 

BudDickman

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41,272
Apparently he'd been there the night before and had a run in with the bouncer who said he looked homeless.
....
Apparently he was just outside harassing one of the waitresses serving the sidewalk tables, telling her about the Toyota he drives.
"Apparently ..." is his way of providing exposition as the omnipotent narrator of his made up story while still pretending to be part of it. Did his "bartender buddy" tell him all this? Also, how the fuck was the guy outside for 20 minutes harassing a waitress, who has to be going in and out of the restaurant constantly?
 

Clint Ruin

I'm sorry, who are you?
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50,834
You left out the capper

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