How about married guys with cats while their wives are away on business trips?

[guest]

 

[HunterSTomlinson]

Casanova Pat wants to cheat on Niki so bad but no one will have him.

 

[guest]

Look at the eyes of that cat. It has seen some fucked up shit. Poor poor thing.

 

[MunchausenByProxy]

“Another business trip to the Bronx?”

“Yeah Pat, the content creator business is really booming there”

 

[EraGodless]

Casanova Pat wants to cheat on Niki so bad but no one will have him.

A man is only as faithful as his options-- Chris Rock.

And Pat has zero options.

 

[guest]

He fucks the cat, doesn’t he?

 

[HunterSTomlinson]

He fucks the cat, doesn’t he?

It’s called “pussy,” child.

 

[SmellenShoehorn]

Casanova Pat wants to cheat on Niki so bad but no one will have him.

Half-casanova

 

[DominusOdium]

"Business trips"

What the fuck business trips does the world's worst seo specialist need to go on? Is there something about not being terribly good at pagerank optimization that can't be done from home?

No, Pat. She's conducting business on a flanelled dyke named Rhonda in a room at the Holiday Inn Express Milwaukee and you don't care because you can do horrible things to your cat in between ruining Star Trek models while she's gone.

 

[AntsBatteryCharge]

Tries to flirt, likes cat costumes, tucks the cat under his blanky with him.

Sources close to the Tomlinsons, who spoke on condition of anonymity, forwarded this gif and claimed it was security cam footage from the half-household.

 

[MonsterSteve]

Only lazy slobs own cats. If he owned a dog he would need to walk it a couple times per day and actually spend time playing with it. Fat fuck.

 

[Mr-Wrinkle-Paws]

Niki hates letting the cat under the covers because it won't leave her crotch alone looking for that dead carp it smells

 

[TheGhostOfAbeVigoda]

If your three year old cat looks sick and decrepit, you should take it to the vet or rehome it to someone who can afford to.

 

[peckafacce]

It’s called “pussy,” child.

It's his wifes cat isn't it? When he claims he was ready access to his wifes pussy, this is what he's talking about

 

[guest]

I've got a $500 bounty for whoever can steal that cat and bring it to me, so I can take stupid Christmas pictures with it in matching outfits and mail them to Patrick.

 

[EraGodless]

Niki hates letting the cat under the covers because it won't leave her crotch alone looking for that dead carp it smells

"What did the blind cat say when he passed by Nikki Robinson? Got damn, yo pussy stank"-- Mewler the Cat

 

[guest]

We have owned several cats over a period of 15 years. None of the cats have ever tried to come under the covers of the bed. He's a sick individual.

 

[Mr-Wrinkle-Paws]

We have owned several cats over a period of 15 years. None of the cats have ever tried to come under the covers of the bed. He's a sick individual.

Pat powders his balls with catnip

 

[Stetten's Long Thumbers]

Casanova Pat wants to cheat on Niki so bad but no one will have him.

Meanwhile she's getting the fuck of her life by a black monster whole munching the shit out of some whores carpet