- Forum Clout
- 3,020
It's my belief that all podcasts are one of the following:
1. You might think you know history, but you really don't. You think the jews built the pyramids? Well, aren't you dumb. Guess you've never heard about the Younger Dryas period of Earth's history when a comet wiped out an ancient, advanced species that existed well before us on Earth. Jews couldn't lug all the stones that built the pyramids, but ancient Sumerian tablets lead us to believe that an alien species genetically modified neanderthals to create homo-sapiens. And why? To harvest gold you fucking idiot. Gold they could take back to their home planet to put in there atmosphere to terraform because of... climate change. Look at the symmetry on these Egyptian vases. You think Egyptians could make a vase this symmetrical? THIS SYMMETRICAL? Don't even get me started about how the Catholic Church robbed earth of its esoteric mysteries when it burned the Library of Alexandria.
2. First you get the money, then you get the power, then you get the woman. I bet you guys think you're a bunch of pussy hounds. But guess what? You're not. A high quality man wouldn't settle for low quality women, let alone disperse their own seed in their hand. But guess what? There is a podcast for you that will turn you into the Top G and get those T levels through the roof.
3. I made money on bitcoin because I used to buy drugs on silk road, but then it got shut down. Now I have millions and I hack life. You guys think there are seven days in a week? Why? People 2,000 years ago thought there were seven days in a week. I live like there are fourteen days in a week. And guess what? I get twice as much done.
4. Coffee is for closers. The ole' Grant Cardone and Gary V rabbit hole. You don't look forward to Monday's? Well, you should quit. If you are a real hustler, you dread Fridays. I hate Fridays, because I love work. And because I love work, I'm going to sell my business and exit with a 3X multiplier. You think my valuation is high? You're high. It's all about increasing revenue while decreasing costs boys.
5. Civilians will never understand. What's your comedic process? Where do you get your material from? Guess what, you better be bombing on stage for at least three years. How else are you going to get any better? I'm great at comedy because I worked the road and did all the shit gigs at Chinese restaurants. That's how you learn how to win over a crowd.
6. Who's on your Mount Rushmore? You know what's fun? Listening to people debate who is the all time GOAT. Is it Jordan? Is it LeBron? Let's discuss over the course of what amounts to thirty six hours of podcasts. Do we think the black twink Caleb Williams will turn the Bears around? What's the over / under Angel Reese does anal?
7. Murder, She Wrote. More like murder she listened to. She listened to nothing but murder stories... then complained about how she has anxiety and needs to see a therapist to deal with PTSD from a past trauma. Ladies love two things in this world: 1) Abortions and 2) Listening to two lesbians chit chat about a grizzly rape & murder over a morning cup of coffee. And how about that Ted Bunny? What a hunk.
8. Politics. Gay & self-explanatory.
9. Aliens probed my butt. Aliens are real, just check the gimble footage of the USS Nimitz. Oh, you don't think they are? Well, why the fuck would COMMANDER FRAVOR lie?!?!?!? Is Bob Lazar legit? Maybe. But you know what's not legit? String Theory. Now, let's check in with resident gay Eric Weinstein on the lack of developments in String Theory and learn about how sexy geometry is.
10. Jocktober 2.0. We're not creative enough to have a podcast of our own, so we're going to make fun of everyone else's podcast as our podcast. Because not trying is funny. And we're most certainly not trying.
Anyone got a cool, new pod they are listening to?
1. You might think you know history, but you really don't. You think the jews built the pyramids? Well, aren't you dumb. Guess you've never heard about the Younger Dryas period of Earth's history when a comet wiped out an ancient, advanced species that existed well before us on Earth. Jews couldn't lug all the stones that built the pyramids, but ancient Sumerian tablets lead us to believe that an alien species genetically modified neanderthals to create homo-sapiens. And why? To harvest gold you fucking idiot. Gold they could take back to their home planet to put in there atmosphere to terraform because of... climate change. Look at the symmetry on these Egyptian vases. You think Egyptians could make a vase this symmetrical? THIS SYMMETRICAL? Don't even get me started about how the Catholic Church robbed earth of its esoteric mysteries when it burned the Library of Alexandria.
2. First you get the money, then you get the power, then you get the woman. I bet you guys think you're a bunch of pussy hounds. But guess what? You're not. A high quality man wouldn't settle for low quality women, let alone disperse their own seed in their hand. But guess what? There is a podcast for you that will turn you into the Top G and get those T levels through the roof.
3. I made money on bitcoin because I used to buy drugs on silk road, but then it got shut down. Now I have millions and I hack life. You guys think there are seven days in a week? Why? People 2,000 years ago thought there were seven days in a week. I live like there are fourteen days in a week. And guess what? I get twice as much done.
4. Coffee is for closers. The ole' Grant Cardone and Gary V rabbit hole. You don't look forward to Monday's? Well, you should quit. If you are a real hustler, you dread Fridays. I hate Fridays, because I love work. And because I love work, I'm going to sell my business and exit with a 3X multiplier. You think my valuation is high? You're high. It's all about increasing revenue while decreasing costs boys.
5. Civilians will never understand. What's your comedic process? Where do you get your material from? Guess what, you better be bombing on stage for at least three years. How else are you going to get any better? I'm great at comedy because I worked the road and did all the shit gigs at Chinese restaurants. That's how you learn how to win over a crowd.
6. Who's on your Mount Rushmore? You know what's fun? Listening to people debate who is the all time GOAT. Is it Jordan? Is it LeBron? Let's discuss over the course of what amounts to thirty six hours of podcasts. Do we think the black twink Caleb Williams will turn the Bears around? What's the over / under Angel Reese does anal?
7. Murder, She Wrote. More like murder she listened to. She listened to nothing but murder stories... then complained about how she has anxiety and needs to see a therapist to deal with PTSD from a past trauma. Ladies love two things in this world: 1) Abortions and 2) Listening to two lesbians chit chat about a grizzly rape & murder over a morning cup of coffee. And how about that Ted Bunny? What a hunk.
8. Politics. Gay & self-explanatory.
9. Aliens probed my butt. Aliens are real, just check the gimble footage of the USS Nimitz. Oh, you don't think they are? Well, why the fuck would COMMANDER FRAVOR lie?!?!?!? Is Bob Lazar legit? Maybe. But you know what's not legit? String Theory. Now, let's check in with resident gay Eric Weinstein on the lack of developments in String Theory and learn about how sexy geometry is.
10. Jocktober 2.0. We're not creative enough to have a podcast of our own, so we're going to make fun of everyone else's podcast as our podcast. Because not trying is funny. And we're most certainly not trying.
Anyone got a cool, new pod they are listening to?
why not talk about Gregory Hines for two hours for years?
